Sir Leeds

Hi @emma-starr,
<p style=”text-align: left;”>Okay, I can kind of see your theme now. Hmm…alright, these are just my thoughts, so take them or leave them, but I think that if your goal is to portray healing over the course of a year, you could experiment with the narrator struggling with an actual physical ailment that either gets better over the…[Read more]

Hi @emma-starr,

There are some good lines here. I especially enjoyed:

“It isn’t so heavy

When it’s quiet.”

And “The limp leaves are still dripping

In the after-silence.”

It seems like this poem is trying to show mood changes through the seasons. Is that right? If so, you seem to be doing well at showing instead of telling and engaging the…[Read more]

Thanks @kb-writer ! This is great feedback!

1) I’m split on keeping the wording as it is because I think it stands out a bit more and makes the reader think a bit more concretely about some of the horrors of martyrdom than otherwise, but I also don’t want to come across the wrong way. I really appreciate your input on this.

2) Yeah, I hear you.…[Read more]

@emma-star

I agree with Katherine. Most great poetry I’ve seen tends to walk a fine tightrope, with extreme ambiguity on one side and extreme straightforwardness on the other. And to me, this piece is leaning towards too much straightforwardness.

Here’s something else to consider: what kind of poetry does Story Embers normally publish? I don’t…[Read more]

@wordsmith , @brandon-miller

I have 221 words to contribute

#poetlife

By the way, I get that the ideas of NaNoWriMo and word wars work wonders for motivating certain writers to action, but I have to admit that I’m not one of them (maybe my genre of choice doesn’t help with that. I don’t know).

Anyway, I just wanted to offer some encouragement…[Read more]

@brandon-miller , @wordsmith

I’m looking at 549 words.

#poetlife

@brandon-miller

My final word count for this week is 117.

#poetlife

<p style=”text-align: left;”>Hi @emma-starr</p>
1) Haha no, you don’t sound like a “tree hugger” to me.

2) The “vibe” I get from this poem is one of “being in the moment”. It kind of reminds me of Frost’s “Passing Through the Woods on a Snowy Evening” in what it’s trying to capture.

3) I wouldn’t say it sounds choppy or disconnected to me. My…[Read more]

Hey @scribbles I usually start with an anthology of some kind and read until I find what I like. Then I research the authors of my favorites and find their work. My favorites lately have been U. S. Poet Laureates, so it’s been easy to find book collections of their work.

@raemarie

Either way works for me. You could post something in one of the critique sections here and tag me in it or you could email me at mr.cainonleeds@gmail.com

Hey @raemarie

I’d be willing to help out. It’s been a little while since one of my pieces has gotten published too, but I’d be happy to help in whatever way I can. How would you like to share what you’re working on?

Hey @corkybookworm,

Sounds like you’ve put a lot of thought into your stories. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to balance a short story and with fantasy. There’s the detail that it takes to build an imaginary world and immerse the reader in it and then there’s the brevity of the short story. Best of wishes to you with both of your…[Read more]

Hi @corkybookworm ! Pleased to “meet” you. That takes a lot of time and commitment to track down and respond to all of the intros.

Seems like you already have two great projects underway. What are they both about?

I’m kind of in a writing rut right now. I have ideas but I’m struggling with how to bring them to life.

Example: I’ve had a poem…[Read more]

Hey @inkling-for-christ , I agree with Daeus and Josiah. Dystopian can be a genre all its own, but oftentimes it mixes with other genres, like sci-fi. 1984, Brave New World, That Hideous Strength, Hunger Games, The Matrix, etc. follow that blend. The only other genre I think I’ve seen blended with dystopian is Western/sci-fi in Book of Eli.

In…[Read more]

I’d tend to agree with you @daeus-lamb

I’ve gotten a few poems published through magazines or literary journals and thought to myself afterwards, “I wonder if anyone actually reads these besides those who contribute to them.” And the thought of taking a book of poems to a publisher without any big awards to my name sounds like a waste of time to…[Read more]

<p style=”text-align: left;”>Thanks for the feedback @quinn-ofallon !</p>
Do you think “Grandma’s House” or “Grandma’s Ghost” would make for better titles? If not, do you have any other ideas for me?

And I can see what you mean about the first part being kind of bland. What do you think about cutting the first line and the Lazarus line out…[Read more]