Fantasy Writers

Character Castle 2.0

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  • #124894
    Jasmine
    @jasmine

    Sorry I haven’t been on a lot lately. Life is pretty busy\distracting lately.

     

    I’m gonna try doing first person with Gwendolyn (I’ve almost never done this before so forgive me if it turns out terrible).

     

    Gwendolyn

    As soon as the dragon set me down on the ground I scrambled out of reach. I stood and eyed it cautiously for a moment but my eyes where soon drawn to the new room. I had been placed in a giant cavern along with the rest of the group. It looked like everyone was here and accounted for so that was good. I turned in a circle slowly, taking in the huge space. There where three walls and where the fourth one would have gone was a narrow bridge. I thought I could see a stairway  begin on the other side and looking up I saw it spiral upwards for what seemed like eternity. I was glad to be out of the cave and on the move again but I wasn’t sure how everyone was going to make it up. I glanced around for Riure and spotted Gavril helping her across the bridge. The way Gavril acted it seemed to be a very far drop.  I had always had a good head with heights but I wasn’t sure about everyone else. Hopefully Liorah wasn’t afraid. I had no idea how she would make it up with a bad leg and fear of heights.

    I was about to head over the bridge when Dancrow walked over with his hands in his pockets, “hey, you alright?” He aasked.

    The first thing that I thought to say was snap that I was fine and didn’t need help.

    Be nice, be nice, be nice. Remember your manners Gwen.

    I smiled “I’m fine.” I said even as my own mind refused to believe that I was the one who needed help. I had always been the strong one, the one helping others and now that I was the weak one my mind refused to believe it. Why?

    I changed the subject, “where are you from?” I asked, a tiny spark of hope that I might recognize the place he named.

    I AM afraid. I'm glad that I am. That tells me I need to be brave. ~W.M.

    #124910
    Rusted Knight
    @rusted-knight

    Allen watched as Riure was led forward by Gavril across the bridge. Flitting by, he checked for traps. This was too good a chance to for the castle to pass up. Then he began to feel light headed. Racing back to safety, Allen began to fall and knew no more.

     

    “You don’t look like a fool.”

    Allen looked at the blacksmith. He felt like he was missing something. The sword felt familiar but it was brand new. Brushing aside the Deja vu, Allen looked at the blacksmith.

    “How much do I owe you?”

    I’ve got Allen figured out now so I’m gonna replace him with this guy.

    Name. Klein Larson,
    Serial number 32468754, Rank, Gunnery Sergeant.
    Job. Spotter, Ruby team, USMC Special Space Company, Marine Raider Regiment, MARSOC, United States Armed Forces.
    Background. Abandoned after birth, orphan, observed for Project Kelpie, adopted by SpecOp recruiter, trained and bioengineered as super soldier. MOS 0328
    Appearance. Tall, square build, bones toughened by artificial gravity, all five senses boosted, reaction time shortened, amber eyes formerly gray, black hair,
    Equipment. Mk. 13 Heavy Infantry Armor “Arges”. M24 Battle Rifle with breaching shotgun. Hand grenades. Combat knife. First aid kit. Basic rations.
    Likes. His “family” (fellow orphans, adoptive family, squad members), bird watching/catching, winning.
    Dislikes. Losing, the unknown.
    Reason. He fights to protect those he loves. After seeing how weak he was, Klein volunteered for the experimental Project Kelpie and becoming a super soldier. Thanks to that training and strengthening, he fights to keep OGHA* forces out of the Solar System and away from not only his “family” but the family of his family.

    *(Outer Galactic Hostile Aliens)

    The Devil saw me with my head down and got excited. Then I said Amen

    #124911
    Rusted Knight
    @rusted-knight

    Klein looked at the file. The debriefing was over. The target was the observation base on 10 Hygiea. Enemy forces were two dozen general infantry and possibly a squad of elite spiders. Destroying the base would remove part of their intelligence network.

    “Feeling good”

    It was Springer, Ruby leader.

    “Yeah, just worried ’bout the spiders. Too little is known about their numbers. If we go down there and run into one of their strike teams, we might not make it back.”

    “Look, leave that to me. You help Fusco spot ’em and take them out before they can react.”

    “Aye aye skipper.”

     

    The suit hissed closed. The HUD lit up and Klein felt a tingle as the neurotransmitter synchronized with the machine. Stepping free of the hanger unit, Klein pick up his gun. Fusco was loading his rifle across from him. Looking down the hanger deck, Klein focused on the far bulkhead. In a flash, the rangefinder in his helmet jotted its findings on the HUD. Terminated the action, he focused the scope on the handle, reading the warnings and operational use of the hatch.

    The comm line flashed in the HUD. Klein opened the channel.

    “Ruby Team, this is Ruby Actual. Comm check over.”

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Two, over.”

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Three.”

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Four.”

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five.” said Klein.

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Six, over.”

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Seven, over.”

    “Ruby Team, this is Ruby Actual. Comm check over. Proceed to landing craft.”

    Sliding his gun over his shoulder, Klein let it magnetize as he walked. Beside him, smaller Armored Marines began boarding as well. Lopez liked those suits. They lacked the armor that the Arges Armors had but he claimed that he could move faster in them. It made sense too. The Arges was meant for stormtroopers and heavy weapons units. It centered on armor and survivability over agility.

    Klein liked the Arges. It was bulkier than the standard Spartio but its bulk allowed for more hardpoints to store arms and ammo. Best to be overprepared than to wish to have had. Plus unlike usual Marines said, the suit wasn’t that heavy. Lopez was the close quarter expert and if he wanted to have that half second in a fight, it was his right to have it.

    Then Klein began to feel bad. Chills swept over him. He hadn’t felt this bad since the augmentations. Then he was free falling in the dark. Or it would have been dark to a normal human. Klein’s eyes saw spiral stairs climbing up a vertical tunnel. Rolling flat, he guided his fall toward the edge of the tunnel. With a burst from his jetpack, He shot into an opening. Snapping his hands into action, Klein broke his forward movement on the ground and slowed to a stop.

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five. Are you there. This is Ruby Five. Please respond.”

    The Devil saw me with my head down and got excited. Then I said Amen

    #124913
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    Aha! I can post again!! Sry for the long absence; I couldn’t get logged in for whatever reason. I’ve been reading everything!

    ———————-

    Something brushed against her hand, and Riure realized it was an arm. She rested her hand atop it, curling her fingers around the cuff of his… shirt? Tunic? Robe? Whatever he was wearing. Adrenaline began to pound in her ears.

    “Don’t worry, you can’t possibly be slower than Liorah,” the prince whispered secratively. “She’s horrified of heights. It was almost impossible to get her across the bridge, and there’s no earthly way I’ll get her onto the stairs. It’ll take prayer and a medium-sized miracle to get her up there.”

    Riure stifled a giggle, getting the distinct feeling that Prince Gavril was trying to take her mind off the danger of what was about to happen. This probably wouldn’t qualify as safe for anyone, whether or not they were handicapped. Which meant…

    “I’d appreciate it if you have a prayer to spare. I’m afraid mine won’t be enough this time-” he stopped himself abruptly, then stammered, “I’m sorry, I don’t– I don’t know if you–”

    They had gotten attention. Most of the conversation had fallen silent. Riure’s stomach did a triple flip and ended in the splits. “I am Redeemed, if that is what you mean. I don’t resent other people of different religions, just the lies that led to those.” She laughed. “And I’ve been praying throughout this whole ordeal, whatever it is.”

    The prince came to a halt, and Riure realized they must be at the bridge. Don’t think, don’t think, don’t think, she told herself. Trust. Trust Kening, trust Adanyi, trust Prince Gavril, trust trust trust.

    “The chasm is about three steps across, four for you. I’ll go ahead and walk backward. Just hold my hands, and I’ll make sure nothing happens.”

    Her hair brushed her shoulders as Riure felt her head nod. She gritted her teeth. If I fall, I probably won’t die, since this is a dream. And if I do, it’s good, because then I get to be in Kening’s presence, and see Adanyi’s face for the first time. See him smile.

    That was the key. That was how she would stay calm. Focus on the longing for the smile.

    Hands grasped hers, warm and reassuring. Help me, Kening. They began to pull.

    Riure took a step, feeling the edge of the chasm through her boot. What a long way down it must be. Were there spikes at the bottom? Snakes? Lava? Or would she just fall for an eternity, screams never ceasing? Would she hit the ground and splatter into a mere pulp of what once was Riure? And then I’d see the smile. Oh, how I want to see the smile!

    Their progress was slow, and once or twice Riure was pulled sharply away as she took a slightly sideways step. Riure decided that Prince Gavril was pretty brave, walking backwards across something this shaky and letting her hold his hands so tight. If she fell, there was a good chance he’d come with her.

    Oh! She loosened her grip slightly, though it took every ounce of her small courage. I mustn’t take him with me. The smile, the smile, the smile. Trust, trust, trust.

    Air brushed her cheek, and Riure smiled slightly. Master Ziess was flying alongside her, keeping her from falling. Maybe this wasn’t so bad after all.

    “Good job, one more step,” the prince coaxed. Riure’s heart leapt; she was going to make it!

    And then the bridge creaked. It was going to break – she was going to fall – someone take care of Sadiq – a jerk. Riure gasped as she flew forward, her feet barely staying on the ground as Prince Gavril yanked her off the bridge. She kept her balance, and stood there for a moment gasping, covered in sweat and shaking from the draining adrenaline. How much longer could she keep doing stuff like this before she had a heart-attack and died?

    “Here’s the banister,” Prince Gavril said, guiding her hand to it. It was smooth and cold, but seemed sturdy. “You’re about two steps away from the cliff, so don’t go far.” He sounded like the last bit of the bridge had given him a scare. “Well done, you did that perfectly.”

    Riure forced the most nervous laugh in her whole career. “Not hardly. Thank you so much. There’s no way I would have made it across by myself!” Now for Sadiq.

    As if in answer to her thoughts, the bridge rattled and banged as Sadiq bounded across, then pressed her nose into her mistress’ leg as if to say, Look at me; I did it so fast! Riure laughed and curled her hand into Sadiq’s ruff, keeping the other on the banister. How long before everyone else came? Was she first in line? Hopefully not.

    Something roared, and heat seared Riure’s face. She gave a yelp and stumbled backwards, but the prince pulled her to the side before she could fall. A cool stone pillar – apparently what the stairs wound around – met her hands, and she leaned against it, panting.

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five. Are you there? This is Ruby Five. Please respond.”

    What in VaSerBo?! “Master Ziess?” Riure called timidly. “Prince Gavril? Ehud? What’s going on?”

    ———————-


    @this-is-not-an-alien
    @rusted-knight @rose-colored-fancy @jasmine @mischievous-thwapling @wingiby-iggiby

    Making something beautiful in a broken world can be harrowing work. And it can’t be done alone.
    ~AP

    #124917
    Rose
    @rose-colored-fancy

    Aha! I can post again!! Sry for the long absence; I couldn’t get logged in for whatever reason. I’ve been reading everything!

    I had the exact same thing! I’m glad it’s working again!


    @wingiby-iggiby


    @this-is-not-an-alien

    do people like characters because they want to be like that character, or because they are like that character?

    Hmm, fascinating question! I think both and neither, let me elaborate!

    Like Cathy said, (IDK if y’all saw that post, it isn’t showing up, for some reason?) people like characters that are interesting, not necessarily perfect.

    In my opinion, relatability is subjective, and often overrated. I have loved characters that are totally different from me in every way, but I think what makes them relatable, likable, and interesting is their motivations, not their actions. This goes mainly for Fantasy and Sci-fi, but for other genres too. I mean, I don’t think any of us have found out we are a long-lost princess/prince or have defeated dragons and evil empires, or been in a war, but most of us have found out something about our heritage/family we didn’t know, we’ve overcome things we struggled with and gone through hard situations. You can relate to the motivations and feelings, even if not to the events.

    (I don’t even know if that rant was relevant, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot)

    As for likable characters, I always feel as though the characters are my friends, more than that I ‘become’ the character I’m reading about, so I can either approve or disapprove of their actions. I also admire some characters because they’re awesome XD

    Also, I can excuse a lot of dumb decisions in a character if I understand why they’re acting as they are.  If a character spontaneously punches someone that mocked her, I’ll think the character is dumb, but if I know that the character was bullied in the past and still feels like a failure because she never stood up for herself, and reacted out of a deep memory that caused her pain, I’ll sympathize and understand.

    And, as Cathy said, characters that have deep flaws, motivations, and conflicting actions are fascinating, even if they do frankly awful things.

    On that note, there’s a clear difference between a character doing bad things because of their personality/motivations and a character doing bad things because they’re excused in the story. An example of this I distinctly remember was the book series “Gladiator” by Simon Scarrow. (I didn’t finish them, and I do not recommend them. XD) The books weren’t objectively ‘bad’ as far as I can remember, but I remember how the character’s obsessive and merciless search for vengeance was justified and written as though it was supposed to be satisfying. It wasn’t. I wasn’t rooting for the protagonist (I don’t even remember his name XD) Because I didn’t agree with any of his actions, and especially not with how he was portrayed, as though he was doing the right thing. I can’t exactly explain the difference, but it’s definitely there.

    I think a factor is a balance, if all your hero/good characters agree on a point, and all the villain/bad characters disagree, you’ll assume the point is correct. But if a character is believing and acting out of a lie and other ‘hero’ characters disagree with them, you’ll immediately get the feeling that the character might be wrong. I think this is mostly a pitfall with non-Christian authors, but it’s just something I’ve noticed.

    So characters who aren’t too perfect are more likely to be liked I think, and characters who do things out of character a little sometimes like the tough girl who cries at least once in the story or the emotional kid who doesn’t cry at a horrible event or the bubbly character who turns serious under a crisis and all that.

    And I totally agree with that, Cathy!

    And another thing I’ve found out is that I like characters who have at least one scene where they have their metaphorical emotional armor off. It makes you sympathize with them more.

    *Three rants and two tangents later*

    So…. that’s my opinion. XD

    Also, I LOVED the Mysterious Benedict Society! The characters are so so so interesting! My favorites are ‘The Great Kate Weathermachine’, and Constance Contraire. (Her insult-poetry makes me laugh) And I don’t know if you read The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey, but the depiction of the Netherlands was SOOO accurate. Especially the ‘why aren’t you in school??’ scenes. I’m not kidding, Dutch people do that. SO. MUCH.

     

    He doesn’t have the traditional Schnauzer cut; his ears aren’t cropped, so he’s a LOT cuter than most.

    I love Schnauzers! The owners of the stable where I ride have a ton of dogs (Like, I’m not kidding, they have like eight dogs), including regular schnauzers and Giant Schnauzers, who literally look like domesticated teddy-bears. They’re so adorable!


    @jasmine

    I’m gonna try doing first person with Gwendolyn (I’ve almost never done this before so forgive me if it turns out terrible).

    You did a great job!


    @rusted-knight

    Your new character sounds really interesting. I can’t wait to see how he interacts with the others!


    @joelle-stone

    WOW! That post was amazing! I was actually scared when she was walking across the bridge, you wrote that SO well!

    Have you ever heard the song ‘Set The World On Fire’ by Britt Nicole? I heard it today and I was just constantly thinking of Riure. I often think of my characters in terms of songs that describe them or that just sort of ‘work’ with them, and that one made me think of her 😉

    "I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right." ~The Book Thief

    #124918
    Rose
    @rose-colored-fancy

    Liorah

    I kept a firm hold on the stone pillar, pointedly ignoring the gaping cavern behind me. Don’t think about it, don’t think about it, don’t think about it. It wasn’t working. I tugged at my shirt, pulling out a corner. It was a Lehabim custom to tie a blue-and-white tassel on each corner of our garments. It was the mark of our faith, a symbol of how Elohim was always with us. I rubbed the tassel, counting the knots. One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. It felt like a prayer, even if I couldn’t articulate it. I barely noticed Gavril leading Riure over the bridge. It was like him, always thinking of others. If I hadn’t been afraid of heights, would I have helped? I hoped so. Maybe. I wasn’t Gavril.

    Gavril placed Riure’s hand on the banister, saying something to her. I noticed how Gavril let out a long breath and raked his hand through his hair. Apparently, he wasn’t entirely immune to heights either. One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. 

    Ehud darted down the stairs and embraced Riure.

    “Wow, you were incredible!” Rosario yanked Ehud back, as they were on the point of disappearing over the edge. They were so close! One, two, three, four, five. 

    Ehud turned to Gavril and waved awkwardly as an introduction.
    “Hi, I’m Ehud! That was really brave I’ve never walked backward on something so thin before…well…” Ehud paused. Rosario stared at Gavril, unsmiling and barely blinking. Gavril stiffened but didn’t say anything.

    “This is Rosy, she’s my best friend ever! She’s been keeping us organized since she got here, you just missed the big monsters and the mirrors and the nightmares,” Ehud said, the words flowing from him without a pause “Hey, you’re really tall, Liorah’s really tall too, you do look like siblings…only way different. She’s real cool, you shoulda seen her grill Kiark, er…and she’s real nice too.”

    I froze, surprised. Ehud thought I was nice? Even after meeting Gavril? That was… unusual.

    “What’s your favorite color? My favorite’s pink! I’m hungry. Rosy says we have to save rations and all that when we get outta here I’m gonna eat a whole steak and a gallon of ice cream…if I can find those…” Ehud trailed off.

    Gavril took a deep breath, apparently out of sympathy. Ehud hadn’t paused in the entire speech. Gavril hesitated, then answered each question systematically.

    “It’s nice to meet you, Ehud and– Rosy?” He said, giving her a questioning look.

    “Rosario.” She snapped.

    Gavril nodded, understanding. I smiled. The name ‘Rosy’ was vastly incongruent.

    “I’m Gavril, but you already know that. And I’m glad I missed the beasts and nightmares. It sounds less than pleasant.” He paused, hesitating. “And I like red.”

    I smiled. I didn’t think it was a question Gavril thought about. One, two, three, four, five. My heart rate was slowly returning to normal, though my breaths still felt tight.

    “Rosario, I believe I saw a room up there. I’m going to see if I can find anything, I’ll be back within a few minutes. If not, you’ll know there’s a trap up there,” Gavril said, casually, as though he wasn’t about to risk his life.

    I swallowed and was about to call him back, but he was already halfway up the stairs. I could feel the stairs tremble as he bounded up them, not in the least bothered by the height.

    One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. The woolen threads twined beneath my fingers, wrapped around each other, interspersed with knots.

    There was a long silence, then the footsteps came again. I let out a quivering breath. He was coming back, so he was alright.

    “Okay, there’s a room up there. It’s made of stone, attached to the wall, so it should hold all of us. It’s big, about the size of this one. Completely empty, except for a door at the other end. It’s closed, so we need to figure out how to open that, but it seems safe.” Gavril said, slightly breathless from running up and down the stairs.

    As soon as he had finished, an explosion of noise erupted from somewhere beside me. I spun around, eyes wide, and pressed my back against the stone pillar.

    Someone, at least, it looked like a person, had catapulted into the cave. He was wearing armor, of some sort. He scrambled to his feet. I heard the distinctive sound of Gavril’s sword sliding out of the scabbard, but the sound paused, as though he had only drawn it out halfway.

    “Master Ziess?” Riure called timidly. “Prince Gavril? Ehud? What’s going on?”

    “It’s alright, someone new has arrived,” Gavril said, his voice tight.

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five. Are you there? This is Ruby Five. Please respond.”

    Yes, it was definitely a man. He sounded anxious, not aggressive, despite his entrance. Gavril’s sword hissed back into its scabbard.

    “You’ve got to admit, that was an impressive entrance,” I said, trying to hide my surprise. “Greetings, what’s-your-name. Welcome to the place we’re all going to die,” I said, sarcasm thick in my voice.

    “Li’ah, stop being so morbid,” Gavril said,

    “Morbid? Me? Why would I ever?! I mean, we’re trapped in a cave, the only way out is up, where we’ll probably all fall to our deaths, and if we don’t, who knows what ‘lord castle’ has waiting for us. How dare I be less than enthused by our futures?” I snapped.

    Gavril rolled his eyes, for the millionth time.

    “I’m Gavril, this highly cheerful and enthusiastic person is my sister, Liorah. All of us ended up here some way or another, and we’re trying to find our way out. And right now,” he raised his voice, addressing the others on the other side of the chasm as well. “That means we’re heading up to the room up there. It seems safe.”

    “Come on, Princess,” Gavril said, gently pushing me up the stairs ahead of him. I closed my eyes, not allowing myself to think of the height. I gripped the rail until my knuckles turned white. My fingers ran over the tassels. One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. 

    “Good job, you’re doing great,” Gavril said, right behind me.

    I was limping again, my leg getting worse with every step. My footsteps sounded irregular on the steel stairs below me.

    “Okay, we’re here, well done,” Gavril said, as we stepped onto the stone. The room was large and empty, as he had said. Except for the door on the other side. I was too exhausted to bother about it and plopped down in a corner.

    “Well, that was awful,” I said, matter-of-factly.

    "I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right." ~The Book Thief

    #124945
    Wingiby Iggiby
    @wingiby-iggiby

    Ok, so I wasn’t the only one who couldn’t log in on here! Phew!


    @joelle-stone

    Ha ha, yeah. What with all the forest fires last summer, I learned not to take the security of the mountains for granted. We had so much smoke that my favorite mountains (and the ones closest to us) completely disappeared, leaving… flatness. It was honestly pretty scary. XD

    Whoa! That sounds creepy! I’ve never experienced anything like that; that’s a TON of smoke! Once, in our old neighborhood, we made so much smoke burning wet leaves that it blocked out the road, but we didn’t realize it, so the fire department came and us kids got to have a tour of the firetruck while my dad put the fire out with our hose, which took forever, LOL

    And your dog sounds cool, as does your (hopefully) new property. 🙂 We have a creek that we play in in the summer; my older sib’s dog really loves it. 😀

    Ha ha, thank you! 😀 And yeah, there is totally something about creeks that dogs love. . . . maybe it’s the getting covered in muck part, LOL . . . and the eating dead fish part.


    @jasmine

    You did awesome with the first person narrative! I really like it 😀


    @rusted-knight

    Klein sounds super cool!!! Can’t wait to see him in action 😉


    @rose-colored-fancy
      @this-is-not-an-alien (I didn’t see your post, Cathy, but Rose was mentioning what you said 😉 )

    Like Cathy said, (IDK if y’all saw that post, it isn’t showing up, for some reason?) people like characters that are interesting, not necessarily perfect.

    I totally agree with Cathy and you!!! (and no, I don’t see her post 🙁 But I know what Ehud and Rosario did from reading your post)

    In my opinion, relatability is subjective, and often overrated. I have loved characters that are totally different from me in every way, but I think what makes them relatable, likable, and interesting is their motivations, not their actions. This goes mainly for Fantasy and Sci-fi, but for other genres too. I mean, I don’t think any of us have found out we are a long-lost princess/prince or have defeated dragons and evil empires, or been in a war, but most of us have found out something about our heritage/family we didn’t know, we’ve overcome things we struggled with and gone through hard situations. You can relate to the motivations and feelings, even if not to the events.

    (I don’t even know if that rant was relevant, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot)

    YES!!!! And it was totally relevant, actually. We like characters when we can relate (in at least some small way) to them!

    As for likable characters, I always feel as though the characters are my friends, more than that I ‘become’ the character I’m reading about, so I can either approve or disapprove of their actions. I also admire some characters because they’re awesome XD

    SAME! EXACTLY! It’s like when you’re watching a movie and shout at the character to “look up for Pete’s sake, LOOK UP!” or “I told you so” or “what? I would totally not do that!”

    Also, I can excuse a lot of dumb decisions in a character if I understand why they’re acting as they are.  If a character spontaneously punches someone that mocked her, I’ll think the character is dumb, but if I know that the character was bullied in the past and still feels like a failure because she never stood up for herself, and reacted out of a deep memory that caused her pain, I’ll sympathize and understand.

    Totally (and great example, btw)! A lot of the articles on here talk about that, and its something I have to keep in mind as I write. 😉

    And, as Cathy said, characters that have deep flaws, motivations, and conflicting actions are fascinating, even if they do frankly awful things.

    Yes! It makes you want to learn more about them so that you can better understand why they did this terrible thing, instead of making you want to stop reading.

    On that note, there’s a clear difference between a character doing bad things because of their personality/motivations and a character doing bad things because they’re excused in the story. An example of this I distinctly remember was the book series “Gladiator” by Simon Scarrow. (I didn’t finish them, and I do not recommend them. XD) The books weren’t objectively ‘bad’ as far as I can remember, but I remember how the character’s obsessive and merciless search for vengeance was justified and written as though it was supposed to be satisfying. It wasn’t. I wasn’t rooting for the protagonist (I don’t even remember his name XD) Because I didn’t agree with any of his actions, and especially not with how he was portrayed, as though he was doing the right thing. I can’t exactly explain the difference, but it’s definitely there.

    I’ve never heard of that series, but, IF YOU’RE DOING BAD THINGS THEY ARE BAD! That’s a very unrealistic perception portrayed in that book. Evil cannot be portrayed as good; if anything, the book should show how his wrong decisions caused pain and more trouble, and then reconciliation — he realizes he’s wrong and there’s a better way.

    I think a factor is a balance, if all your hero/good characters agree on a point, and all the villain/bad characters disagree, you’ll assume the point is correct. But if a character is believing and acting out of a lie and other ‘hero’ characters disagree with them, you’ll immediately get the feeling that the character might be wrong. I think this is mostly a pitfall with non-Christian authors, but it’s just something I’ve noticed.

    That is a really interesting observation (how do you notice this stuff???)! It brought this scenario to my mind: in Star Wars (have you seen it?), Anakin doesn’t agree with everything the Jedi Order believes (such as their take on love), but the other Jedi seem quite fine with it and try to correct him. It makes you think Anakin was wrong . . . or was he actually right, on some points at least?

    So characters who aren’t too perfect are more likely to be liked I think, and characters who do things out of character a little sometimes like the tough girl who cries at least once in the story or the emotional kid who doesn’t cry at a horrible event or the bubbly character who turns serious under a crisis and all that.

    Ooooo, YES!!!!! I completely agree, Cathy!

    And another thing I’ve found out is that I like characters who have at least one scene where they have their metaphorical emotional armor off. It makes you sympathize with them more.

    Yes! Like they let someone else they are really close to know how they really feel!

    Also, I LOVED the Mysterious Benedict Society! The characters are so so so interesting! My favorites are ‘The Great Kate Weathermachine’, and Constance Contraire. (Her insult-poetry makes me laugh) And I don’t know if you read The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey, but the depiction of the Netherlands was SOOO accurate. Especially the ‘why aren’t you in school??’ scenes. I’m not kidding, Dutch people do that. SO. MUCH.

    Oh, I read that a long time ago, y’all! I don’t remember much, but I do remember that I was TOTALLY hooked (and that the characters were some of the most colorful I’ve ever read of)! And are you saying that you skip school? 😛

    I love Schnauzers! The owners of the stable where I ride have a ton of dogs (Like, I’m not kidding, they have like eight dogs), including regular schnauzers and Giant Schnauzers, who literally look like domesticated teddy-bears. They’re so adorable!

    AWWWW!  That is so cute!!! I love Schnauzers, they are literally some of the best dogs!!!!!!

    "Whatever man loves dominates them. I loved wrong, for I loved myself. You don't know how sorry I am."

    #124951
    Wingiby Iggiby
    @wingiby-iggiby

    DANCROW CART 

    “I’m fine,” she said. Her voice was slightly tense, and I deducted that she was either just wary or didn’t like the idea of my help. Personally, I didn’t exactly feel comfortable setting an arm anyway. Then she changed the subject.

    “Where are you from?”

    I ran a hand through my hair. “Well, I’m from Karodvia (say: Kah-road-vee-ah). Specifically, I live in Fancho.” I stared at her keenly, watching her eyes to see if she recognized it. At that moment, however, there was a huge blast of air that blew my hair back from my face, and a man landed with a heavy thud on the platform. My eyes widened in awe even as my hand immediately whipped out my gun. He was like a walking arsenal, and the first thing out of my mouth was: “that’s awesome!” There’s nothing like that in Karodvia, and we’re one of the most advanced countries in the world.

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five. Are you there? This is Ruby Five. Please respond.” He said.

    Are there really other worlds besides Indrach?

    Then my eyes wandered to the staircase, and I realized that I had probably better get moving. The others were already there! I turned to the girl. “Come on. We don’t want to be left behind.”

    Then I darted past the man, still gripping my revolver. I wasn’t sure if he was an enemy or not, and no chances were I taking.

    “Greetings, what’s-your-name. Welcome to the place we’re all going to die,” Miss Snoot — still couldn’t grasp her name — said sardonically as I came to stop just before the bridge. Gavril attempted to reason with her, and I just suppressed a laugh. But then I looked down.

    It was so deep. Very deep. I was tempted to find something to throw down into it just to hear how long it took to hear if it hit the bottom — if there was a bottom, that is. But this was no time for play. Taking a deep breath, I put a timid foot on the bridge. It wobbled, but not too bad. And besides, the others were watching, especially the girls — I darted across before I could argue otherwise. But when I looked back at the drop, my heart fell down into it. Then Gavril came back down the steps, and I realized he had gone up to the room above. With a weak chuckle, I turned to hear what he had to say.

    “I’m Gavril, this highly cheerful and enthusiastic person is my sister, Liorah. All of us ended up here some way or another, and we’re trying to find our way out. And right now. That means we’re heading up to the room up there. It seems safe,” he proclaimed.

    “‘Seems safe;’ wonderful. I am eternally comforted,” I said dryly. But I had to admire his courage in checking it out.

    I ascended the staircase behind them, the metal railings cold beneath my clammy grasp. Between the steps was emptiness, and I had to watch my feet to keep from getting one stuck between them. Soon, however, after a few agonizing minutes — I had to glue my eyes to Miss Snoots’ back (she moved rather slow, but I couldn’t blame her what with the bad leg and all) because I couldn’t look down again — we were in the room.

    I let out a sigh of relief. The room was dark and black; like a prison cell. I had thought about prison cells for a while, because they were where I could end up — or worse. But I always pushed that thought out of my mind so that I could continue on. Like right now.

    I wanted to sit down in a corner, but there were others who probably needed the extra support of two walls against their backs more than I did. So I sat down on the floor off to the side, watching the others intently, trying to learn all I could. But as I adjusted myself, my hand brushed something hard and square. I picked it up.

    What the?

    It was a small black block. Iknar Wai! One of our two small, compact radios, the ones that we stole from a Verg bunker! I stared in shock. How? I shook my head. This was too much, and I sat for a second, trying to understand. Then, I realized what I had. I could try contacting my friends! I didn’t even consider the fact that the signal was probably more than blocked — but just before I was about to press the button to speak, I did stop.

    If it worked, I could give away their identity. But I could let my family know I was safe! But they could be captured. But I need help!

    I threw my head back with an exasperated moan and knocked it on the wall. I let out a small yelp of pain. But the blow cleared my mind. I would not call. I couldn’t be that dumb and brave-less. But . . . did the radio actually work? I wanted to know, and I wanted music. Suddenly, all I wanted was to hear the familiar sound of my favorite music. I needed that comfort, and ever since the Vergs took all of our radios, televisions, and whatnot, we had only been able to listen in secret to an old player mother hid. Us and our neighbors would gather round to listen, huddled over it and listening just as intently for any sign of danger.

    I needed music.

    So I turned the knob to channel 3 —

    *”And I said, “Hey pretty lady, won’t you give me a sign?”

    “I’d give anything to make you mine all mine”

    “I’ll do your biddin’ and be at your beck and call”

    I leapt to my feet and nearly dropped the radio as it blared the rapid song at top decibel. I frantically turned the volume down, but I could hardly contain my ecstasy and waved it around as it continued to play. “It works! It works! Ecray Was!! YES!” 

    I didn’t care that they probably thought I was loony, but I did keep my voice at a medium. This was a connection to the world I apparently had left behind; the only thing familiar to me.

    It was to be my new comfort — I knew it.

    ***************************************************************************************************

    *Sold (The Grundy County Auction Incident) It’s a real song, and really fun, LOL

    "Whatever man loves dominates them. I loved wrong, for I loved myself. You don't know how sorry I am."

    #124960
    Rusted Knight
    @rusted-knight

    “Master Ziess? Prince Gavril? Ehud? What’s going on?”

    Klein froze. He wasn’t alone. It was a rookie mistake. Turning his head, he saw them. They looked human but Klein remembered the spider he had killed on Mars. Outside of his robotic extras, he looked human too.

    There were a half dozen or so. They were split up on two sides of a bridge. None of them looked like spiders. If they were aliens, he could take them all out without a problem. But none of them looked surprised by him. It was an anomaly. For now, he shouldn’t hide his allegiance. Opening his shoulder pad, Klein displayed the American flag.

    None seemed to recognize it. Slowly, Klein reached for his rifle. These guys were probably enemy. Then from across the bridge, a radio blared.

    ”And I said, “Hey pretty lady, won’t you give me a sign?”
    “I’d give anything to make you mine all mine”
    “I’ll do your biddin’ and be at your beck and call”

    Klein recognized the voice from a few old songs he listened to back at the orphanage. It was still the early to decide who these people were. They might be descendants from one of the warp drive accidents of the last century. His own appearance here was probably linked to wormhole disturbance of the enemy. If so the Donald Trump and the rest of the fleet must have discovered an enemy fleet and were in battle.

    Deactivating the polarization of the HUD, Klein let his face show. It might not be much but it might gain a little trust.

    “Does anyone know were I am.”

     

    Just to help the visualization, Klein’s armor looks like this

    The Devil saw me with my head down and got excited. Then I said Amen

    #124966
    Cathy
    @this-is-not-an-alien

    Whoa’k, posts disappeared XD. Just gonna re-post and–hey Klein sounds neat! That should be interesting cos Ehud loves tech… a lot.

    In movies, I always love the brash one! Like Mater in Cars!

    AHH MATER! I love him! “Like tuh-mater but without the tuh” Have you seen Cars 2? In that one he gets tangled in with a buncha spies it’s awesome!
    Heheh *–awkward pause–*

    *plops down onto bed, sighs, then picks up computer and begins to write. . . .* So, after a busy day, I sit down to type on the forum. I went to the orthodontist this morning, and had my guitar lesson in the afternoon . . . then this evening I spilled honey-mustard on a. the floor b. the wall c. the refrigerator d. myself, including inside my ear (don’t ask)

    Oh you poor thing! I once dyed pudding green so, lol, no matter how many stupid things you do someone will always have done something stupider at some point XD. (…how did you get mustard in your ear?)
    You take guitar lessons, that’s so cool!!! I always wanted to learn to play a guitar but I don’t have a) the time b) the money c) the patience and dedication. It is an acoustic or a bass or an electric?

    do people like characters because they want to be like that character, or because they are like that character? What do you and @everbody-else think?

    I think there’s about three different types of characters people (basically me) fall in love with. There’s the people you love because they’re fascinating and have intense wants/needs. Like I remember the first time I read Inkheart I fell in love with this character called Dustfinger who was frankly an awful guy. But he was a) luringly mysterious and knew more about what was going on in the plot that we did for a while b) he wanted to get home so bad you just had to pity him even after he *ack no spoilers! Although it’s not really a spoiler it happened pretty early in the story but…anywayXD* and c) he was a coward but he was constantly reaching for a better way of life etc and his struggle gave him a lot of dimension especially against all his other unsavory traits and d) he was wronged and bullied and any injustice instantly makes you sympathetic.
    Or like the Phantom in the Phantom of the Opera who was like the only actual character in the musical (:
    Even though the whole plot centered on him manipulating a young and susceptible singer/ballet dancer with the grief of her father’s death, you still kinda want him to succeed or something because he’s a) intriguingly mysterious b) wants desperately to be loved resulting in a sort of co-dependency between him and Christine and c) he had been wronged early on and sorta “excused” his controlling/murderous/manipulative behavior
    So there’s characters like that who you love because they’re struggling and dynamic and characters you love because they are layered. Like one of the first child-characters I really enjoyed reading about was Meggy from Inkheart because she had realistically conflicting

    personality traits; she was emotionally mature, but still gullible because she didn’t have adult experience. So even though she’s suspicious and obstinate she’s also very trusting and sweet. Her strong rigid emotions conflict with her adolescent confidence and fairytale idealism. She had dimension and character growth. So I mean it is a you are that character but also it reveals new things about yourself whether you want to be like the character or not.
    So I guess characters I can see have more than one side and struggle with conflicting traits are really likeable and interesting to me. And then there’s just the characters I love because.
    Like Leo Valdez in Percy Jackson who’s my absolute favorite. He’s cocky and insecure and funny and he struggled to feel like he mattered to the group and that was a struggle that made you like him and he was also really funny. I probably like him because I’m like him.
    And Kate from the Mysterious Benedict Society, she was happy-go-lucky, energetic, and impulsive and I loved her and all the characters in that book. They all had quirks and good and bad traits. So characters who aren’t too perfect are more likely to be liked I think, and characters who do things out of character a little sometimes like the tough girl who cries at least once in the story or the emotional kid who doesn’t cry at a horrible event or the bubbly character who turns serious under a crisis and all that.
    So that’s about a billion words to say one thing 😛

    “Here’s the banister,” The new guy said to Riure, the one that didn’t look like coal. “You’re about two steps away from the cliff, so don’t go far. Well done, you did that perfectly.”
    Ehud cocked his head onto his shoulder staring at them. He’d completely forgotten about that. He was so used to climbing himself it had never occurred to him how hard it would be for a blind girl and a bunch of people who didn’t live on the Flying Islands. After a couple seconds Ehud managed to disentangle himself from Rosario’s grip, promising to be good, not run along the staircase etc etc. She gave him a withering look as a threat and released him excessively close to the banister so Ehud took the hint and meekly pressed his hand along it as he bounded down to them.
    “Wow you were incredible!” Ehud exclaimed squeezing Riure with a hug that nearly sent them both of the edge. In a second his hood jolted him back and he grinned up sheepishly. The moment Rosario opened her hand Ehud was in front of Liorah’s brother.
    “Hi, I’m Ehud!” he said, waving a little awkwardly “That was really brave I’ve never walked backwards on something so thin before…well…” Ehud tilted to the side and rubbed his hair trying to confirm with his memory whether or not that statement was true. In the end he shrugged and stuffed his hands back in his pockets. Rosario hung behind him like a protective shadow skipping over the man and assessing.
    “This is Rosy, she’s my best friend ever! She’s been keeping us organized since she got here, you just missed the big monsters and the mirrors and the nightmares. Hey you’re really tall, Liorah’s really tall too, you do look like siblings…only way different. She’s real cool, you shoulda seen her grill Kiark, er…and she’s real nice too. What’s your favorite color? My favorite’s pink! I’m hungry. Rosy says we have to save rations and all that when we get outta here I’m gonna eat a whole steak and a gallon of ice cream…if I can find those…”

    Don't let the voices in your head drive you insane;only some of them can drive; most are underage

    #124984
    Jasmine
    @jasmine

     

    I’m gonna try doing first person with Gwendolyn (I’ve almost never done this before so forgive me if it turns out terrible). You did a great job!

    You did awesome with the first person narrative! I really like it

    Wow, thank you guys! It was really fun to write.

     

     

    GWENDOLYN

    “Well, I’m from Karodvia. Specifically, I live in Fancho.” Replied Dancrow. My hopes of knowing where he was from vanished. Was everyone here from a different world? Probably.

    A blast of hot air made me jump and a huge, iron man (haha sorry I couldn’t think of a different way to describe Klein’s armor In Gwendolyn mind) landed in front of me. Dancrow snatched something from his hip and pointed it at the newbie as I whipped my sword from my scabbard and held it out in front of myself. “that’s awesome!” Dancrow exclaimed.

    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five. Are you there? This is Ruby Five. Please respond.” the newbie Ruby Five said.

    Dancrow turned to me “Come on. We don’t want to be left behind.” He ran past me and headed for the bridge.

    “Does anyone know were I am.” asked Ruby Five.

    I lowered my sword. It looked like we had another member to the try-and-find-a-way-out-of-magic-castle club.

    “Welcome to Lord castle.” I said, ” where all your nightmares come true. We’re just trying to find a way out. Your welcome to join us.”

    I sheathed my sword and headed over the bridge.

     

     

     

    I AM afraid. I'm glad that I am. That tells me I need to be brave. ~W.M.

    #125011
    Rose
    @rose-colored-fancy

    @wingiby-iggiby

    I’ve never heard of that series, but, IF YOU’RE DOING BAD THINGS THEY ARE BAD! That’s a very unrealistic perception portrayed in that book. Evil cannot be portrayed as good; if anything, the book should show how his wrong decisions caused pain and more trouble, and then reconciliation — he realizes he’s wrong and there’s a better way.

    I totally agree! I think what contributes to that phenomenon is when characters don’t have realistic consequences and reactions to their actions. As far as I can remember (I read it almost two years ago) he didn’t have any consequences for the stuff he did. I think that’s what makes it seem ‘good’ because he seems to get satisfaction (of some sort) from his vengeance.

    That is a really interesting observation (how do you notice this stuff???)!

    Over-analysis, of absolutely everything XD Writing has ruined books and movies for me. I’m constantly thinking stuff like ‘that was an excellent use of the catalyst’ or ‘oh, they changed X to give the protagonist more agency’ or ‘The sword clearly represents unforgiveness. Without a doubt.’ It’s kind of fun, though it annoys my family when I start analyzing the movie out loud XD

    It brought this scenario to my mind: in Star Wars (have you seen it?), Anakin doesn’t agree with everything the Jedi Order believes (such as their take on love), but the other Jedi seem quite fine with it and try to correct him. It makes you think Anakin was wrong . . . or was he actually right, on some points at least?

    Well, I haven’t seen it, but I think that the conflict between the heroes kind of forces you to make up your own mind on things since it messes with the black-and-whiteness. Personally, I love it when the heroes still have conflict, since it makes them individuals instead of a uniform group. Like, they can have different opinions and still have the same goal. Especially if their opinions tie back to their backstories and personalities! It seems to be pretty common that the heroes agree on everything, and that’s throwing away an opportunity for character development!

    Oh, I read that a long time ago, y’all! I don’t remember much, but I do remember that I was TOTALLY hooked (and that the characters were some of the most colorful I’ve ever read of)! And are you saying that you skip school?

    Yes, those characters are SO good! I loved them all, especially since they were so vastly different! And no, I don’t. XD As I mentioned before, I’m homeschooled, so my school times are irregular sometimes.

    *Sold (The Grundy County Auction Incident) It’s a real song, and really fun, LOL

    Okay, I had to check it out, and it is really fun, but it’s going to be stuck in my head from now until eternity XD

    Liorah

    I sighed. My leg was throbbing so badly I had to grit my teeth. It would heal quickly, but right now, it hurt so badly that it was the only thing I could think about. I leaned back against the corner, nestling myself in the dark. Gavril stood by the door, reluctant to step away from the light.

    “I’m going to help Riure, stay here,” he said, briefly, before heading down the stairs again. His footsteps sounded slow and heavy. After all, this was his third time back and forth, and it was a long way.

    Dancrow thunked down against a wall, then scrabbled at the ground, before picking up a small black box. I glanced at it before dismissing it. Just a black box. Dancrow cradled it, turning it over and over, then thumped his head against the wall. I raised an eyebrow. That was one way of coping with frustration.

    He turned a dial and the loudest music I’d ever heard blasted out of it. I clapped my hands over my ears. It was loud and fast, a singing voice over some sort of plucked instrument I wasn’t familiar with. It sounded faintly like an oud, but not quite. How did that music get in the box?

    Dancrow quickly turned it down to a moderate volume, but he was grinning.

    “It works! It works! Ecray Was!! YES!”

    I frowned, puzzled, then shrugged it off.

    “Good for you. Nice music. How’d it get in there?” I asked. I didn’t intend to be sarcastic, but I was tired and it came out that way. I sighed. What did it matter, after all? He already had a bad opinion of me, so he wouldn’t care.

    Gavril

    Liorah settled in a corner and I hovered near the entrance. I didn’t want to venture into the dark if I didn’t need to. Liorah sighed, stretching her wounded leg out in front of her. Fresh red spots had appeared on the bandage, the recently healed wounds torn open again. There was nothing I could do about it. She closed her eyes, leaning back against the wall. She looked tired, almost fragile, her face drawn in lines of pain. There was nothing I could do about that either, after all, she wasn’t fragile and she was fully capable of taking care of herself.

    If it had been Keturah, for example, I would have had to comfort her or something of that sort. Keturah was a noble’s daughter and a friend of mine. My thoughts drifted toward her. The way she smiled, the way she drew a wrinkle between her eyebrows when concentrating, they kept nudging into my mind at the most inopportune moments. I shook my head, forcing myself to focus on the present situation.

    “I’m going to help Riure, stay here,” I said, turning and heading down the stairs again. Exhaustion dragged at me, making each step even heavier than usual.

    Before long, I was downstairs. Ehud, Rosario, Riure, and two others were at the bottom, hesitating whether to go up. Gwen was just about to cross the bridge.

    And the armored figure was on the other side of the chasm, drawing something that looked like a weapon. Gwen held a bare sword, but I didn’t think she’d get through the armor.

    “Does anyone know where I am?” The armored figure asked. He let his helmet slide back, revealing his face, but he didn’t put away his weapon.

    “Welcome to Lord castle.” Gwen said, ”where all your nightmares come true. We’re just trying to find a way out. You’re welcome to join us.” She lightly stepped over the bridge, having little trouble with it.

    “Go on, I’ll manage here. It might be dangerous.” I said, quietly. “Ehud, Rosario, help Riure, please, and be careful.” While I was speaking, I had unwrapped my sling from where it hung on my belt. Before I’d finished talking, it was loaded and I could loose within a second or two.

    “You know, I understand the sentiment, but I’d appreciate it if you put away that weapon. Besides,” I offered a half-smile, “I can shoot before you can.” I gestured toward my sling but made no aggressive motions. I didn’t actually know if I could shoot first, but he probably couldn’t recognize my weapon and would err on the side of caution. Hopefully. My tone was relaxed and controlled. It was the same voice I used while trying to calm a panicked horse. I needed to get him to put away those weapons before someone (Likely Liorah)’s actions were interpreted as dangerous.

    A thought occurred to me and I said,

    “Are you in the military?” It seemed likely, judging by the armor and the weapons. If he was, at least we’d have something in common. Uncle had let me start taking over the cavalry drills two years ago. Even though I’d mastered everything we practiced, it was a lot harder to earn the respect of the warriors. There hadn’t been a war since the one ten years ago, and I had only faint, haunting memories of that. I stubbornly refused to remember them. I’d pushed them into the same place as my father’s death. That was over.

    If there ever was another war, I would have to lead them, and I prayed every day that wouldn’t happen.

    I decided to assume he was and continued, in a matter-of-fact tone.

    “Here are the basics: The castle is aware of us, to some degree at least, and is malicious. There was a recent attack, by some sort of beasts. I wasn’t here, so I can’t give you information on those, but at least two people are seriously injured. My sister, and Gwen,” I gestured toward her. “The castle seems to possess healing properties, or it might be the alteration of time, but the wounds are healing at approximately twice the usual rate. We have a limited food and water supply. There is no distinguishable link between any of us, and we all seem to be from different worlds and time periods, as far as I can tell.” I paused.

    “Liorah and I are Lehabim, from Yerasht. We live in the 70th year after the Great Treaty, but I don’t think that says anything to you.” I wanted to give some information, in hopes he would give some too.

     

    "I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right." ~The Book Thief

    #125055
    Rusted Knight
    @rusted-knight

    “Welcome to Lord castle where all your nightmares come true. We’re just trying to find a way out. You’re welcome to join us.” said a woman satirically.

    Turning, she bounded across a wooden bridge. Crossing from the other side was a man crouching slightly.

    “You know, I understand the sentiment, but I’d appreciate it if you put away that weapon. Besides, I can shoot before you can.”

    Klein looked at the sling. A crude weapon but the projectile might be more sophisticated. Israeli commandos still used slings to lob grenades with rather great accuracy. In a pinch he could always snap the armor plate shut over his visor. But why cause a problem that could be avoided.

    Laughing Klein spoke. “The first one better knock me out.”

    He released his rifle. These people were just as confused as him.

    “Are you in the military?”

    Klein remembered the drill. It had been pounded into him for weeks.

    “Klein Larson, Gunnery Sergeant, 32468754.”

    “Here are the basics: The castle is aware of us, to some degree at least, and is malicious. There was a recent attack, by some sort of beasts. I wasn’t here, so I can’t give you information on those, but at least two people are seriously injured. My sister, and Gwen. The castle seems to possess healing properties, or it might be the alteration of time, but the wounds are healing at approximately twice the usual rate. We have a limited food and water supply. There is no distinguishable link between any of us, and we all seem to be from different worlds and time periods, as far as I can tell.” The man paused, contemplating something. “Liorah and I are Lehabim, from Yerasht. We live in the 70th year after the Great Treaty, but I don’t think that says anything to you.”

    And he was right. Klein had heard of a warp capable vessel, the Castel that had gone missing in the asteroid belt decades ago. Lord Castle could be a twisted form of the ship’s name, passed on to the next generation. Animals were known the mutated without the pull of gravity and lack of food could also be explained this way but the rest could not.

    For now he should help escape. Stepping onto the bridge, Klein felt it sag and the ropes go taunt. No good. The armor was too heavy. Oh well. Backing away, Klein looked at the chasm. A little wide but he could do it. Taking a running start, he jumped. A short burst from the rocket booster got him across.

    “Well now. Lets break out of prison.”

    The Devil saw me with my head down and got excited. Then I said Amen

    #125087
    Cathy
    @this-is-not-an-alien

    , I LOVED the Mysterious Benedict Society! The characters are so so so interesting! My favorites are ‘The Great Kate Weathermachine’, and Constance Contraire. (Her insult-poetry makes me laugh) And I don’t know if you read The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey, but the depiction of the Netherlands was SOOO accurate. Especially the ‘why aren’t you in school??’ scenes. I’m not kidding, Dutch people do that. SO. MUCH.

    Constance Contraire’s poetry lol, it was awesome! I read the first three books but it’s been years since I’ve read them I just remember it was one of my absolute favorites! Ooh, how do you say “why aren’t you in school?” in Dutch? Your new pic’s really interesting btw it looks like it could’ve been from ancient Egypt or Greece!

    Also, I can excuse a lot of dumb decisions in a character if I understand why they’re acting as they are.  If a character spontaneously punches someone that mocked her, I’ll think the character is dumb, but if I know that the character was bullied in the past and still feels like a failure because she never stood up for herself, and reacted out of a deep memory that caused her pain, I’ll sympathize and understand.

    That describes it perfectly! I mean like, there’s dumb decisions characters make that you just roll your eyes at and there’s dumb decisions from trauma that draw readers to your character, even if they don’t know the past if it’s enough out of character for the reader to pick up on it’s fascinating instead of revolting.
    That whole ‘rant’ was awesome btw!

    Over-analysis, of absolutely everything XD Writing has ruined books and movies for me. I’m constantly thinking stuff like ‘that was an excellent use of the catalyst’ or ‘oh, they changed X to give the protagonist more agency’ or ‘The sword clearly represents unforgiveness. Without a doubt.’ It’s kind of fun, though it annoys my family when I start analyzing the movie out loud XD

    Lol that is soo true! Like you can never read/watch the same again and me and my siblings like to predict where a series is headed and bet on who’ll guess right.

    “It’s nice to meet you, Ehud and–Rosy?” It had been a long day and Rosario didn’t trust anybody except her wide-eyed, excessively trusting friend. She would’ve much rather just listened in the background; Ehud was gifted with all the social skills and she was left with the practicability.
    “Rosario.” She corrected, looking the newcomer up and down as if she could take him apart to anticipate any level of betrayal he might be capable of. Ehud had sole rights to calling her Rosy and she had no interest in becoming ‘chubby’ with everyone here, some of them at least were going to die so there was no reason to become attached.
    “I’m Gavril, but you already know that. And I’m glad I missed the beasts and nightmares. It sounds less than pleasant.” Rosario still had no interest in becoming attached to co-workers. “And I like red.”
    Ehud grinned and blushed, squeezing Rosario’s arm delightedly. Most of the people Ehud just met at home didn’t take the time to listen to his chatter. Rosario allowed a small smile at his enjoyment but she was still assessing with ‘Gavril’ was just trying to get on their good side. Being Liorah’s brother provided him with somewhat more credibility but Rosario was naturally more suspicious of polite people.
    “Rosario, I believe I saw a room up there. I’m going to see if I can find anything, I’ll be back within a few minutes. If not, you’ll know there’s a trap up there,” He left up the stairs. Rosario wasn’t sure that was the most advantageous course of action but at least he seized some initiative and she didn’t have time to stop him he was already up the stairs. You would think Rosario had enough practice stopping stupid schemes with Ehud but no one else got that privilege of her unwavering protection and alertness. Ehud jabbed her arm playfully.
    “You should be nicer to Gavril,” he whispered conspiratorially “he might think you’re mad at him.”
    “Why does everyone assume I’m angry?” she said “I am merely acting efficiently.”
    “Maybe cos your face looks like you’re planning ten different ways to murder everybody!” Ehud staggered with giggles and Rosario rolled her eyes.
    “I’m not thinking about that, idiota.” she said. Ehud shrugged and glanced at Liorah. It hadn’t occurred to him there was any immediate danger but she looked scared for her brother. He almost made a move to nudge her arm affectionately when Gavril returned.
    “Okay, there’s a room up there. It’s made of stone, attached to the wall, so it should hold all of us. It’s big, about the size of this one. Completely empty, except for a door at the other end. It’s closed, so we need to figure out how to open that, but it seems safe.”
    Rosario nodded and was about to say something when an explosion occurred. For some obscure reason she was not surprised. No, no surprises here, just a blockbuster size metal man.
    “Master Ziess? Prince Gavril? Ehud? What’s going on?” Riure asked.
    “It’s alright, someone new has arrived.” Gavril answered. Ehud grabbed the blind girl’s hand helpfully.
    “It’s this big guy in a suit that looks like WarMachine!” He explained excitedly, cocking his head on his shoulder, trying to imagine how it worked.
    “Ruby Actual, this is Ruby Five. Are you there? This is Ruby Five. Please respond.”
    “You’ve got to admit, that was an impressive entrance,” Liorah said “Greetings, what’s-your-name. Welcome to the place we’re all going to die.”
    “Li’ah, stop being so morbid,” Gavril said, and Ehud blurted out laughing.
    “Morbid? Me? Why would I ever?! I mean, we’re trapped in a cave, the only way out is up, where we’ll probably all fall to our deaths, and if we don’t, who knows what ‘lord castle’ has waiting for us. How dare I be less than enthused by our futures?”
    Ehud choked, unintentionally yanking Rosario by her arm which he was still clinging to. Gravril coached Liorah up the staircase and Ehud stared up at Rosario.
    “So…whadawe do now?” He drawled innocently. Rosario glanced sideways at him and ruffled the back of his head.
    “Take Riure upstairs, carino, stay with the group. I’ll take the back, in case anything happens.” She cocked her gun, not aiming it at the newcomer yet but letting it relax by her side rather than in her holster. Ehud rolled his eyes as he complied.
    “You always assume the worst of everybody.”
    “If you roll your eyes far enough you might find your brains there, idiota.”
    Ehud rolled his eyes again, this time almost looking like he was trying to test that theory. She shook her head pushing him up by his hood and he wrapped his arm around Riure’s shoulders and squeezed, deliberately holding one of the rails as he made every effort not to monkey up as fast as possible.
    Rosario watched Liorah talk to the metal man quietly, just in case anything happened and to glean more information.

    Don't let the voices in your head drive you insane;only some of them can drive; most are underage

    #125096
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    @rose-colored-fancy,

    Over-analysis, of absolutely everything XD Writing has ruined books and movies for me. I’m constantly thinking stuff like ‘that was an excellent use of the catalyst’ or ‘oh, they changed X to give the protagonist more agency’ or ‘The sword clearly represents unforgiveness. Without a doubt.’ It’s kind of fun, though it annoys my family when I start analyzing the movie out loud XD

    Ha ha, RIGHT?! I went on vacation over the weekend, and everything I did I somehow managed to get it into my book or research it for my book or use it for my book. I was telling my dad about it, and my older sib (who was listening in) was like, “Do you do ANYTHING but books?” 😛


    @this-is-not-an-alien
    ,

    “If you roll your eyes far enough you might find your brains there, idiota.”
    Ehud rolled his eyes again, this time almost looking like he was trying to test that theory.

    Is it weird that I tried that too? XD

    Making something beautiful in a broken world can be harrowing work. And it can’t be done alone.
    ~AP

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