Character Castle 2.0
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Hi! Thanks for the welcome! I can’t wait to find out more about Rilyn and Konyar. They sound awesome in your summary!
“You sound really cheesy,” Rilyn told him, though a hint of a smile played at her mouth.
“Well,” said Konyar defensively, “Thwaping’s writing this on, like, two hours of sleep, so cut her some slack.”
“Thwapling?” Rilyn cocked her head to the side. “Who’s Thwapling?”
Konyar shrugged. “You know… the person who could make us live in a magical gnome universe with man-eating fuzzballs with a simple click of her fingers on the keyboard.”
LOL! I love that! Fourth-wall breaking is always fun, especially since Konyar can do it but Rilyn doesn’t.
Sorry for completely disappearing. A LOT of stuff happened in my family
I hope everything’s alright now😉
Hi Cathy!
Thanks! It’s sorta a thing for me in nonwritten world that I’ve always been fascinated with peoples’ voices and verbal ticks and phrasing and I think Liorah has a pretty distinctive voice too; she’s a bit of Kiark’s in a more feminine way and Lizzy from Pride and Prejudice
I totally understand that! I also really like to just listen to how people phrase things, specific recurring phrases, and accents, etc. Thank you! I’m so glad Liorah has a distinctive voice, I struggle with getting it on paper the way I think it XD It’s so cool that you think Liorah sounds like Lizzy! I never noticed, but now you mention it I can totally see what you mean! That’s so cool!
Hi Joelle!
I LOVE the idea you came up with for Riure! It’s brilliant!
Liorah
A loud, sweet laugh rang through the cave, breaking through the sounds of battle. I recognized it as belonging to the blind girl. Relief washed over me. So she was alright. Oddly enough, the creature on top of me flinched. It curled its claws into my flesh as a cat would do. I shrank against the rock, biting my lip to keep from screaming.
“Hey everyone, laugh as loud as you can!” The blind girl shouted, “It hurts them!”
I gritted my teeth.
“Maybe later. I’m a bit preoccupied.” I mumbled, even though nobody could hear me. The creature growled, bringing its huge teeth closer to my throat. Another loud laugh reverberated through the cave. The wolfish creature cowered, only to growl more fiercely.
I wriggled my right arm, trying to free it from the weight. I just needed to get my dagger. A few more inches. Its claws dug deeper into me until I couldn’t keep quiet.
“You mangy wolf-beast,” I snarled, already inventing a few more colorful adjectives.
A hiss. A thud. The creature on top of me gave a deafening roar that hurt my ears. It tore its claws out of my arms, then thudded to the ground, dead or unconscious. I rolled away from the creature, getting out of reach of the claws. An arrow stuck out of the creature’s back.
I glanced toward the girl with the bow. Blood ran down her right shoulder and she held it stiffly. How had she shot with that shoulder? I drew my dagger and finished off the beast, just in case.
I dropped another bullet in my sling and slung it at a creature attacking the girl. It dropped. I glanced down at my arms. Scarlet blood stained the marks where the creature had clawed me. I needed to get out of here. I started backing toward one of the passages, keeping the weight off my bad leg. I occasionally shot down a beast that came too close for comfort and tried to cover the bow-girl’s back. It was the least I could do.
Two huge lizard-like creatures stood near a high passage, and the blind girl was climbing down. She was okay.
I backed into a passage, managing to make it a few steps back before my leg finally gave out and I collapsed to the ground. I tried to stem the blood flowing from my torn leg.
“Okay, maybe I didn’t quite think through breaking that mirror,” I muttered to myself.
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
Do you guys think we should split the characters up by having them escape through different passageways? Or should they all go into the same passageway and work it out themselves?
Beautiful things don't ask for attention
I just wanted to say I love how much you make the battle come alive for Liorah!
That was a wonderful idea, having Riure laugh!! I love it; it is totally something she would do 😀
Aw, thank you!
And ha ha, that’s so funny how Wylo gave you that fire idea, lol 😛 I wonder how often we are feeding off of each other!
I’m so glad you’re back!!! I hope everything is alright now, and that you get better sleep tonight 😉
Hmmm…. I’d say the same passage, if we want to keep them together for extra close contact, that is, lol. Or, they could split up in small groups; later reconnecting in some way. This would have them get to know individuals better and see who they would most likely gravitate to in terms of having to choose about being stuck with them for any period of time. 😛
Those are just my thoughts, ha ha. I tend to think out loud on here.
I light the arrow, pull the bow,
Shoot that fire right through my soul.Um, going with experience, I’d say staying together or making sure we have large groups would be the best idea. In the other Character Castle, once everyone got split up, things slowed down drastically, until Cathy had to give us a boost. Just sayin’. 🙂
@mischievous-thwapling
Konyar breaking the Fourth Wall was hysterical!Bang!
Rosario slid her left hand out with a fresh pistol, her right hand falling back to holster the first which was now empty. Years of training, she almost made herself ambidextrous but she still favored her right hand. It was so routine and easy shooting the monsters, they didn’t have human faces they were just moving targets. Not all of them were affected by the bullets though, this was a problem.
I’m not letting this crap happen to Ehud.
I’m not.Ehud watched her ignore him and continue to fire away in her own little world. It was so hard to get her out of that because she was purposefully blocking him out. But I can do this, I can, I know I’m not the best or the brightest but I won’t learn unless you give be a chance. He didn’t know how to express what he was thinking in a way that didn’t make people laugh. Which made him furious right now when he was trying to be taken seriously.
“You can’t push me out! I’m not a damsel in distress!” He yelled so empathically his cheeks turned crimson “and I’m not cute!”
Abruptly Rosario yanked him by his hood and fired right behind him. Bang! He tottered to one side rubbing his head. “Oww, that was my ear…”
“…sorry?” she attempted, still hauling him back by his hood. “Ok, first; get out of my face. Second; you’re cute, Ehud,” she said crisply “deal with it.”
“Hey everyone, laugh as loud as you can! It hurts them!” shouted a voice
“Uhhh…is that? Wow she’s quite a climber.” Ehud stared up at Riure, still rubbing his ear. “Hey I guess laughter really is the best medicine. Hahaha, now I have a superpower!!!”
Rosario stared at him completely unimpressed just as several monsters screamed behind them.
“You cannot be serious.”
“I laugh in the face of danger hahahaha!” Ehud shouted at the top of his lungs right as Riure cackled contagiously so Ehud fell over on Rosario’s shoulder laughing while she rubbed her temples long-sufferingly. It never ceased to amaze Rosario how quickly his mood could change. He was wholly and completely resilient to pain by the mere fact that he couldn’t focus on it long.
“So everybody has to laugh right?” He bobbed up and raked his hair, before nearly darting off except Rosario had a firm grip on his hood. Not that it seemed to bother him in the slightest because he just kept flapping around trying to get everybody to hear.
“Octopuses are living sticky tacks! Beauty and the Beast and Pride and Prejudice are the same story in different eras! And no vampires could survive Italy!”To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
@wingiby-iggiby
I like the idea of split up for a short time but also like @joelle-stone said. Maybe if they split up when the castle produces clones or shows their deepest fears or something that they each individually face then small groups would magnify it but right now they’re probably stuck with each other XD.To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
More laughter broke out from the other side of the cave. “Octopuses are living sticky tacks! Beauty and the Beast and Pride and Prejudice are the same story in different eras! And no vampires could survive Italy!” shouted Ehud.
“What in First Place are you talking about!?” Cried Gwendolyn ( “First Place” is the name of Gwendolyn’s world). Never mind. It didn’t matter.
She ended another foe and skipped out of the way of the next.
“Okay, maybe I didn’t quite think through breaking that mirror,” mumbled Liorah.“Your not the one who broke it.” said Gwendolyn through clenched teeth. She dodged and stabbed, finishing another enemy.
She wanted to stop and catch her breath. Take in her surroundings and see who was hurt, who was dead, and who could keep fighting. But the on-rush of beasts was to great. She had to keep fighting or die. Maybe she would keep fighting and die. Who knew?
She was almost to the exit. But what would that do? They needed a way to block the monsters from following. A gate or a…
Her thoughts where cut short as a giant rat with wings launched itself at her, a ear-splitting shriek along with it. She raised her sword and the monster plowed into it. The impact knocked her back into the passageway where she rolled over and over in the dust. She groaned and pushed herself to her hands and knees. She stood up and stumbled, catching herself against the exit wall. A wooden lever jabbed her in the chest.
“Everyone get inside! ” she shouted, “Hurry! “.
She stood by the lever and fought of any beast that came near. Hopefully the lever was what she thought it was. Or else everyone might be backed up against a dead end.
Beautiful things don't ask for attention
“Octopuses are living sticky tacks! Beauty and the Beast and Pride and Prejudice are the same story in different eras! And no vampires could survive Italy!”
Ha ha ha ha, WHAT?!?! That is hilarious. Ehud is the best. 😛
Excellent post! I actually have creatures in my world (VaSerBo) named snads, which happen to be giant flying rats. 🙂
That’s awesome. I can never think of good names for made-up animals. *sigh*
do you happen to have any tips?😉
Beautiful things don't ask for attention
@joelle-stone
Haha, thanks! Ehud’s so fun to write with!That’s awesome. I can never think of good names for made-up animals. *sigh*
do you happen to have any tips?
Step 1; bang your head on the keyboard, it should look something like this; dlkfjelksfhlekhfsek. Step 2; begin spacing letters and adding vowels and you find names; dilk
fjel kesfhl ekhef sek. Step 3; this method has never worked for me :P.
Or…what I like doing more is fiddling with traditional fantasy creature names and give new spins, like mud goblins and bush fae. Or you mix two or more animal names the fantasy creature is based off or the adjectives that describe it and then mix and mush the words; merecat+dog=meredog, or fox+feline=werfock (were-fox creatively spelled)To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
“Everyone get inside! Hurry!” Grabbing Ehud, Rosario shoved him headfirst into the passage, following after.
“And a synopsis of Finding Nero is…” Whatever else he was saying was muffled in the escape. As she got in the darkness almost completely enveloped them again until a soft pink light illumined Ehud face, just bright enough to see a couple feet ahead. He was holding glow-in-the-dark pony with a broken leg that was–you guessed it–bright pink. Beaming he stared up at her, and caught her expression.
“What?”
“I’m not–”
“It’s a pony and it’s pink do you have a problem with that?!”
“I’m not saying anything, idiota.” Rosario says, turning him around to examine his injuries. “What’s bleeding?”
“I think I am…” He grimaced up at her innocently and started whimpering. “It’s just a scratch.”
“Where’s it bleeding from?” she asked patiently. He rubbed the side of his head, sticking half-dried blood to his hair and shrugged while Rosario gently patted his arms and sides until Ehud yelps painfully. That was four or five gashes, relatively minor.
“I’ll be ok,” He said in his most pitifully squeaky voice
“Oh porita,” she cooed sweetly, brushing his hair out of his face “knock it off, drama queen, you’re fine”
All his whimpering magically ceased and he pouted indignantly.
“Well that takes all the fun out of being injured!” he cried but Rosario merely nodded and smiled, fumbling through his pockets for bandages.
“We’ll need to wash the injuries, if I had some alcohol that would be an excellent disinfectant.”
“Oh.” Ehud said “Do we have any water supply, guys?”To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
@joelle-stone @this-is-not-an-alien @jasmine
Yes; they should stay together! But I would like to do greatest fears, if that is alright with y’all 😉
Cathy, it’s so sad that no one takes Ehud seriously! And a glow-in-the-dark pink pony…. you are hysterical!
Also, everyone, this post is SOOOO long cause I was trying to fit everything in like the perfectionist I am, *sigh*….
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KIARK
I glimpse a blur rapidly buzzing toward me, and suddenly I hear a whirr and see a flash of blue light. The blob on my head loosens, and immediately I am wresting it from my scalp and throwing it to the ground, stomping on it and watching it spread out in a floppy, icky mess. I glance up and see the fellow who saved me. He’s a tiny fellow; a flying fellow… like one of the silver-fables, I think. Then he’s gone, and I fall back against the wall with a gasp. I moved too quickly, and I am terribly light-headed.
I take deep breaths, and glance toward Wylo. He’s still battling the insect-creature, but at that moment a metal bullet hits it in the side in an explosion of sickening green blood.
But they are a part of the distance, far away. I only see my sword. My head is calmer; I have a feeling that the blob was sucking my blood, because I’m no longer bleeding very much and the pounding has stopped. Still, I swagger forward like a drunkard before snatching my steel from the floor.
I stand there, amidst all the chaos, a bloody mess, head still burning. But I feel my heart pumping strong, and I know I’ll be alright if only I can kill before I am killed. Yes. I set my goal for at least five of those deranged monsters. I lurch toward Wylo, who has sheathed his sword and is rapidly firing on the creatures with a strange new weapon that I can’t even register properly in my brain right now. He sees me and nods.
I put my back against his, partly to support myself a bit, partly because of the fighting advantage it gives. I wait till an animal leaps, a grotesque ball of dagger-like points with the ears and nose of an elephant; then I angle my blade so it skewers its own body. One down, four to go. My adrenaline is pushing away my dizziness and pain; if only temporarily. I hear the small explosions of Wylo’s gun.
Suddenly he whirls around and decimates another charging dogbear beast with a lucky shot, and I’m standing alone, but I don’t care. I search for something else to kill; I’m bloodthirsty. I have vengeance to take. Oh, yes. No one gets away with wounding the Heir of Banerow.
“Fall back to the second row ….. Wen and Eltar shield the dragons.”
I hear Rosario, and it rekindles my anger. Then I see Liorah, and there’s a vile creature inches from her face. How dare it try to kill one of us, even if it is her. Besides, I never miss a chance to be heroic.
I start toward her, but that is when I hear a very out of place sound: laughter. Riure. She is chortling uncontrollably, and like every other creature, human and otherwise, I turn to look up at her, sitting on the ledge and giggling like a veyna. “Hey everyone, laugh as loud as you can!” She stands up and waves something small in her hand. “It hurts them!”
I laugh just thinking about how ridiculous that sounds.
All the creatures are wailing and screeching, in terrible pain. I see one of the dragons rush to help Riure. So laughter does work. But I can’t get my own throat to laugh; in fact, I can’t get myself to do anything. I can’t move.
The cries and laughs, bouncing off the walls, reverberate in my head. I feel all the energy drain from my body, and my limbs feel like jelly. Riure’s laughter rings in my ears like a clear, shining bell, and then another laugh joins in in a slightly lower tone. But soon the cackles are tormenting, filling and thundering in my whole consciousness so that all I know is unending giggling, in different tones, different styles, ringing in and out, loud then soft….
“Stop,” I cry before I can think. “Stop it now! Stop, stop!”
I get my body to work and put my hands over my ears, staggering backwards. Everything is starting to darken, my vision is going blurry. I clench my jaw and squeeze my eyes shut against the pain.
My head burns.
***
WYLO
What is she doing? Does she even know what is going on? That people are getting wounded? Maybe even killed?
Riure is laughing.
Then she shouts, between giggles, that laughter hurts the animals. The animal charging me falls to the floor. Indeed, I see them falling all around, hear them wailing; I hope that girl can laugh for a good long while before going hoarse, because there is no way I can find it in me to even chuckle.
That’s when I hear Kiark yell: “Stop! Stop it now! Stop, stop!”
I dart forward and catch him in a trust fall just as he collapses backwards toward the stone floor. I see, around his scalp under the gold band, and in his skin where the hair parts, tiny round puncture marks from tiny-needle claws.
Poison.
His face is streaked with dried blood, and is red and slightly purple-ish. It looks like Waynot’s face that time so long ago when he defended me in the school yard….
I shake my head to clear my mind, and slide my arms further under his. Then, I yelp in pain and surprise, nearly dropping Kiark to the floor. Indeed, I have to lower him and bend back to grab my vice, which I had dropped, and fire at the furry little beast tearing my leg in a last attempt before it succumbs to the laughter. I’m lucky I don’t hit my foot with the bullet.
“Ahh,” I hiss under my breath. I check my wound, and at least there are no major arteries snapped. But my calf is mauled, and bleeding pretty bad. I grab Kiark again, and start dragging him.
“Everyone get inside! ” I hear Gwen shout, “Hurry!”
I don’t even second guess getting into that place with all those people, because I would like to live. And my brother — no, my nephew. He needs help. He may be annoying and brash at times, but so were we. He’s all I have left of the Waynot I used to know.
Dragging him into the corridor, I don’t glance at any of the others. A strange pink glow fills the space, and I hear Ehud and Rosario murmuring. I keep dragging Kiark farther back, farther back, as far as possible, until I have to stop. I lower him gently to the ground.
I have to attend to my wound, so I tear off one of my silver coat-tails and wrap it tightly around my calf. I pray, though I don’t know who I’m praying to, that Kiark will be fine. You may say I am an expert with poison; I’ve been tangling with it for year after year, making it, trying to find a cure for it, traveling all over Varai (name of their world) to find it. But I’m not.
“Do we have any water supply, guys?”
It’s Ehud, and I realize in disgust that, of all things, I didn’t grab the canteen off of my desk. I’ll just have to make do; I’m pretty sure I can, so long as it isn’t infected. Besides, I realize with a bit of excitement, I have my vial.
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This reply was modified 5 years, 4 months ago by
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This reply was modified 5 years, 4 months ago by
I light the arrow, pull the bow,
Shoot that fire right through my soul.I just wanted to say I love how much you make the battle come alive for Liorah!
Thank you so much! You’re doing a great job with Kiark and Wylo! I usually struggle with battle scenes, so I’m glad you like it!
Also, poison is an amazing idea! I can’t wait to see how that works out!
“Octopuses are living sticky tacks! Beauty and the Beast and Pride and Prejudice are the same story in different eras! And no vampires could survive Italy!”
Oh, my goodness! That’s hilarious! I mean, he’s not wrong. Ehud is the best!
Second; you’re cute, Ehud,” she said crisply “deal with it.”
Truer words have never been spoken! Ehud is adorable. That’s just a fact. As proof:
He was holding glow-in-the-dark pony with a broken leg that was–you guessed it–bright pink. Beaming he stared up at her, and caught her expression.
Any person who carries a bright pink glow-in-the-dark pony in their pocket as a matter of routine is adorable.
Also, Rosario and Ehud together are amazing, I just love their interactions!
I was curious, do you have a plot for them yet, or are they just loose characters for now? Have you started writing yet?
Okay, I don’t have experience with naming animals, but I’ve named quite a few places, objects, weapons, etc. My favorite method involves Google Translate.
I type in a relevant word and translate it into a bunch of languages (I usually pick a theme, like middle-eastern languages, whatever suits your world.) Until I find a word that sounds good, and then I might change the spelling a bit. It’s proved quite dependable so far!
It’s rendered country names like Tirbren (Hill-land, Welsh) Terrenpla (Flat-land, in Catalan, I think?) and Yerasht (Wilderness in.. Turkish?). The names sound quite unoriginal when you translate them, but it sounds cool if you mix and match a bit.
@everyone
Yes! Worst fears sound good! *Cackles* I actually really like doing this in my stories, whether in the shape of dreams or in real life.
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
Liorah
More and more people flooded into the passage. Ehud and the authoritative girl hurried in. Ehud pulled something out of his pocket. A soft pink light filled the passage. I raised an eyebrow. The thing was a bright pink horse-shaped lamp. Of all things!
“You know, I’m fairly sure horses don’t come in that color,” I said, dryly.
Bow-girl found a lever that I hoped would close off the passage. She was wounded and still warding off beasts. I had to go help her. I started getting up, but my mangled leg collapsed beneath me and I fell back down, hissing a few choice words. Gavril would have been shocked at the last one, but it felt like my leg was on fire.
Just then, Silver-suit dragged in Kiark. My eyes widened. He looked terrible. I didn’t notice any wounds, but his face was covered in blood and flushed an unhealthy violet. Silver-suit’s leg was a torn mess, at least as bad as mine and probably worse. He tore off his coat-tail and hastily wrapped it around his calf, but it did little to stem the bleeding.
“Do we have any water supply, guys?” Ehud asked,
I reached back and grabbed my water-skin. It was almost full, carrying more than a day’s worth of water. Always double-check your gear and carry two day’s worth of water. Those words were the clearest memory of my father. I could almost hear his voice as he said them. Two day’s worth of water wouldn’t go far if you got lost in the desert, but it was enough to keep you alive until you were found.
I tossed it to the authoritative girl, not pausing to take any for myself. The others needed it more.
“Make it last. It’s all I have,” I said, briefly. “Make sure the others get some, I think Kiark, Bow-girl, and Silver-suit need it pretty badly.” I didn’t know the other’s names, and I didn’t have time to ask. My descriptions were close enough that she would know who I meant.
I pulled my head-scarf out of my belt. It was almost as long as I was tall and quite wide. It served the double purpose of sun-protection and protection against head injuries if you fell off your horse. I knew a better use for it now.
I tore it into narrow strips for bandages, keeping one for myself and handing the others to the leader-girl. Even if she didn’t know anything about healing, she would make sure they reached someone who did.
I drew up the leg of my pant and felt sick as I glared at the mess of blood. I didn’t need this right now. I could make out long, tearing marks where the wolf beast had clawed me and a deeper mark where the first one had bitten me. My stomach turned and I tried to distance myself from the bloody mess as I bandaged it. The pain kept jerking me closer, drawing me into the wounds and the blinding firey pain.
I let out a choked hiss of pain and blinked the tears out of my eyes. It was over and the wound was good enough for now. The turquoise of the fabric immediately turned a sickly brown with the scarlet blood soaking into it.
I dragged myself to my feet, holding onto the wall for support. The Bow-girl needed my help. I only paused to wipe the tears of pain out of my eyes and snarl an insult at a small beast that collapsed before my feet, already dead.
I limped over, my leg throbbing with every step.
I drew my scimitar out of the scabbard. The beasts were so close, I couldn’t use my sling properly. I sliced through the one the girl was fighting.
“Get back, you’re hurt. I’ll keep it open and pull the lever when the others get here.”
Without waiting for her reply, I cut through another.
The girl gave me a doubtful look, glancing at my bandaged leg.
“I’m fine. Go,” I hissed,
Laugh.
I could still hear the blind girl’s ringing, bell-like laughter.
I let out a fake laugh, but my laugh was neither ringing nor bell-like, even when I wasn’t wounded and terrified. The laugh sounded more like a goat strangling on a mouthful of gravel. The second laugh sounded like a camel with the last stages of pneumonia.
The beasts shrank back with snarls. At least they had some sense. That sound scared even me.
___
Just to clarify: Bow-girl is Gwendolyn, Silver-Suit is Wylo, and “authoritative girl or leader-girl” is Rosario. I couldn’t realistically have her use their names since she wouldn’t know them.
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
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This reply was modified 5 years, 4 months ago by
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