Character Castle 2.0
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@e-n-leonard I’m curious, what’s the premise of Jade and Rosemary’s world? It sounds really creepy and SUPER dystopian XD
Definitely creepy and dystopian! Her world has a nasty class system kids get funneled into permanently at the Final Year (or they get Culled), and there’s rigid control and dreadful things I probably shouldn’t mention here, all while the leaders act like they’re the most wonderful people in the world.
We are called to be lights in the cosmos.
May your inkwells never run dry!@e-n-leonard yeah that does sound really nasty! What’s Jade’s backstory?
dreadful things I probably shouldn’t mention here
I’m not sure you’ll have to worry about that in this castle XD
I actually really like kinda disturbing dystopian settings! Spire used to be way more dystopian (especially before adding characters like Kit and Valencia), but one half of the story is still about super soldiers living in a lab…so I’d say it’s still very much connected to those roots!
*laughs as one fey*
Her backstory is still a little vague, but:
All her life, she has had extraordinary skill in ballet. She is also the daughter of two Fishers (which is a class in and of itself), and she absolutely hates that occupation. Therefore, she’s been working at her ballet skills her entire life so that on the Day of Destiny, the Benevolents will make her a Dancer. She also kinda toys with the idea of maybe gaining power in the higher ranks of Benevolents if she can because she thinks she’d do a better job controlling things, but that’s nothing very major so far. Anyway, part of what happens on the Day of Destiny is the Culling of kids deemed unfit for any class. These people are sent to work to fish food factory until they die…and then, um, they get turned into fish food…. This matters to Jade because her cousin committed suicide after her lover was Culled. So Jade deeply despises this system, and also guards her heart fiercely. Rosemary is her only friend because of this.
Now Rosemary, poor girl, is very smart, so the Benevolents are likely to make her a Doctor, which is NOT someone who cures disease in this world. It’s more like a group of insidious, high tech, biochemical weapon administrators handpicked by the Benevolents. Rosemary does not want that future, so she wants to keep herself unnoticed and unremarkable (“I’d probably get executed the first day on the job. Hardly a pleasing prospect.”)This is pretty much impossible. She has to learn everything she possibly can to help her little brother, Zeke, who is likely to be Culled because of disease. This need for knowledge and capacity to handle it she well knows are monitored. With all this going on, she’s willing to sacrifice herself for Zeke’s sake.
I could go on about them all day, so I’ll just cut it off here 😂
We are called to be lights in the cosmos.
May your inkwells never run dry!goodness that is a fantastic challenge! I can’t wait!
Thanks! Now I’m desperately trying to figure out the premise of Enydd’s decision. XD Oh goodness…this castle is doing wonders for Enydd, meaning that as an author I now have even more work to do for her.
Enydd: I couldn’t let you get away with making me a joyful, wise character who has been rejected by society!
Me: You were so much easier back when you were like that though.
Enydd: But aren’t I a much better-rounded character now than before?
Me: Only slightly.
Enydd: You don’t believe that.
Me: Get back in the book.
Enydd: That’s a yes!
This whole challenge is great, but that last line is AWESOME! This will be interesting …
Thanks 🙂 I’m curious to see what all the other character’s decisions are.
These people are sent to work to fish food factory until they die…and then, um, they get turned into fish food
Goodness that IS dreadful!
Those are some really interesting backstories for both Rosemary and Jade!
Thanks! Now I’m desperately trying to figure out the premise of Enydd’s decision. XD Oh goodness…this castle is doing wonders for Enydd, meaning that as an author I now have even more work to do for her.
Oh don’t you love it when the castle does that?
I don’t think I’ve gotten to know Enydd well at all! What’s the premise of her character?
Also, I have a proposal for the challenge! I think that there should be a death penalty threatened for characters who refuse to tell their worst regret. Idk about Enydd, but I know for a fact that neither Kit nor Valencia are going to be cooperative at all, and I suspect that might go for many more characters in here!
Plus, I can absolutely see Kit just…
“What’re you going to do, kill me?”
*stone spear launches from the wall, Qatar style*
Although, we could be even more creative with the traps we choose this time…
Or maybe not even a death penalty, but some kind of really, really bad consequence that would motivate them to at least heavily consider telling.
OH! Maybe the castle could threaten to make them relive that regret all over again if they don’t tell?
*laughs as one fey*
Sheesh this castle moves fast XD
I’m the one who has never seen pas de chat spelled before; I’ve only ever heard my ballet teacher say all of these terms! Don’t tell Jade I screwed up for her. Her pride will shatter, and I’d rather have that happen according to the plot .
*shoves eavesdropping Jade back into the notebook where she belongs*Oh goodness that’s hilarious XD It could happen to anyone though XD
It’s so cool that you dance! I used to, but I had to stop when we moved. I’ve always kind of regretted that I had to quit, I really loved it and kinda still do. It’s some of the most vivid memories I have though, so I’m just living through Ophelia I guess XD
I do like that giving her a project has really made her show her character! I’m glad it’s …helping (?) Ophelia.
Oh, it is helping her! Or at least, it’s helping me XD
And I absolutely LOVE Jade and Rosemary’s backstory! The whole premise sounds amazing! Tell me if you ever need beta-readers, I’m totally up for it!
Also, I LOVE that challenge! Lots of interesting things that can happen there!
Kit: “…”
Kit: “What do you mean search, I’ve been here this entire time ;)”
LOLLL that was the most Kit possible way to introduce himself XD
OH! Maybe the castle could threaten to make them relive that regret all over again if they don’t tell?
That’s horrible we gotta do it!!
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
Also, umm… on the heels of the Kit reveal… XD (Oh gosh I’m also kinda nervous about this)
You know when characters develop without asking you first? Well, that happened again, with Calliope specifically.
A day or two ago, I realized Cal is very likely queer (I think bi as well but I’m not positive). I left that idea where it was and thought about it and prayed about it some more. It hasn’t gone away, it has rather become stronger, and elaborated.
So, a rant about Cal incoming XD
I’ve known Cal has always felt like an outsider for some reason, and I also realized she has a bad relationship with most of her family, except her sister. I wasn’t quite sure why though. Originally I thought it was because she went off to study something her parents weren’t absolutely convinced would be useful and necessary. However, that isn’t quite enough of a reason for them to be so completely estranged.
So, the idea of Cal being queer occurred to me. (Two of my Christian writer friends actually pointed it out as well) Originally, I wasn’t very on board with the idea, because writing it from a biblical perspective that is neither celebrating it nor harshly condemning her is going to be hard.
However, I’ve been praying about it and the idea keeps persisting. (Also being a Christian writer is inherently hard XD)
I think Cal and her family are Christian, but when Cal was seeking support from her family and her church, she was judged and completely rejected for it and ended up leaving, very hurt and disillusioned. I don’t know to what degree she still believes, but I know she’s not currently part of any church or community and kind of avoids it. However, I think she knows her current life is empty to some degree and wants to go back, but she’s also terrified.
I think she ended up telling her family because she was caught between living a lie and feeling like she was deceiving everyone and possibly being rejected. I think she hoped for help from her family and church, and she ended up not getting it.
As far as I know, a large part of her character arc will involve Malcolm (Who you’ve seen mentioned) because he’s a very strong Christian, so it’s a kind of back and forth for how both of them deal with the situation.
Besides that, the most important theme of Murder of Swans is not belonging and rejection. Each of the characters has something that causes them to be different to a certain degree. Neurotype, disability, origin/race, class, and now, queer characters as well. I almost feel that I’ll be deliberately avoiding an entire side of the problem if I decide to exclude that side of Cal.
However. This is a sticky subject, to say the least. It’s hard for a Christian to tackle since there’s just so much gray territory between ‘how should a Christian writer deal with this differently from a secular author’ and how exactly it should be shown.
So, I’m asking for y’all’s opinion on this one. I want to leave Cal in and see where it goes, but I really don’t know what I’m doing XD I’m figuring this out and praying about it as I go.
Basically, what are y’all’s opinions on this? Should I leave her in? What are your perspectives on this?
Until I hear from y’all, I’ll just be writing Cal without touching on this side, but it’s pretty unavoidable if we get to the worst regrets part. XD
I look forward to hearing from y’all!
(I think that’s everyone…)
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
Calliope
Anika’s face turned grim, as though a cloud had passed before the sun.
“Well, I don’t know. It was just me when I was caught and sold, but I like to think I have more now. Maybe a little sister.” She nodded toward Natalya. “She has some, though.”
I froze. Sold. Did she mean that metaphorically or– It didn’t sound like a metaphor. Was that normal in their world? How could it be? How was I supposed to deal with this?
“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, but Anika just looked confused, as though she wasn’t expecting my sympathy.
“I have four brothers,” Natalya said, briefly. “One brother is older, and three younger.”
She looked away, face hard and drawn. She clenched her fists, as though she resented me for bringing up the thought, resented me for reminding her of what she’d lost.
I hadn’t meant to hurt her.
“You?” She barked. “Is it just you and your sister?”
I nodded, silently.
“She went back to China two years ago. I haven’t seen her since,” I said, quietly.
In a way, it was just me now. Maybe that was for the best.
____________
I think after this they’ll all be headed to the hall so I’m just going to stop there XD
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
Plus, I can absolutely see Kit just… “What’re you going to do, kill me?” *stone spear launches from the wall, Qatar style*
Hahahaha
So, the idea of Cal being queer occurred to me.
…
Gay or trans-guyish vibes…? *Shrug* just spitballing!
*cackles in literally over half my characters being queer/queer coated*
*including Ehud but like it’s not even relevant to the plot he’s nonbinary and asexual coated but he doesn’t do anything with that so like anybody who wants to notice it cool anybody who wants to be like “that’s just Ehud” also cool, he’s equally cool with it I think he forgot he was queer and literally everybody else notices it more…*
Tbh, I have no clue what Ehud’s gonna see as his biggest regret. Whether it’s something stupid, tragically stupid, intensively philosophical or…I sure hope he doesn’t decide to go into a shortstory philosophical rant like he did with his worst fear haha…!
Her backstory is still a little vague, but: All her life, she has had extraordinary skill in ballet. She is also the daughter of two Fishers (which is a class in and of itself), and she absolutely hates that occupation. Therefore, she’s been working at her ballet skills her entire life so that on the Day of Destiny, the Benevolents will make her a Dancer. She also kinda toys with the idea of maybe gaining power in the higher ranks of Benevolents if she can because she thinks she’d do a better job controlling things, but that’s nothing very major so far. Anyway, part of what happens on the Day of Destiny is the Culling of kids deemed unfit for any class. These people are sent to work to fish food factory until they die…and then, um, they get turned into fish food…. This matters to Jade because her cousin committed suicide after her lover was Culled. So Jade deeply despises this system, and also guards her heart fiercely. Rosemary is her only friend because of this. Now Rosemary, poor girl, is very smart, so the Benevolents are likely to make her a Doctor, which is NOT someone who cures disease in this world. It’s more like a group of insidious, high tech, biochemical weapon administrators handpicked by the Benevolents. Rosemary does not want that future, so she wants to keep herself unnoticed and unremarkable (“I’d probably get executed the first day on the job. Hardly a pleasing prospect.”)This is pretty much impossible. She has to learn everything she possibly can to help her little brother, Zeke, who is likely to be Culled because of disease. This need for knowledge and capacity to handle it she well knows are monitored. With all this going on, she’s willing to sacrifice herself for Zeke’s sake.
Bro. When can I read this?!?!
To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
I think all the characters won’t be too keen on talking about their decision. I was thinking that maybe if they refused, the castle would either tell everyone what the decision was (basically narrating it in the most sarcastic, humiliating, guilt laying tone possible), or the castle would show everyone the character making his decision, movie-style.
I don’t think I’ve gotten to know Enydd well at all! What’s the premise of her character?
I’ve honestly just uncovered her backstory. XD
Enydd’s in an early 20th century-like world. She was raised in a loving family and is the oldest out of five kids. When she was around seven, several things happened that tainted her family’s name in the eyes of the world. Over time, resentment against her parents and the world built up within her, reaching a climax when she finally released all of her anger and bitterness on her family. She deeply regrets this action and feels guilty, but she is too scared to try to reconcile with her family. In an effort to make up for what she did without actually going to her family, she follows in her father’s line of work, something she vowed to never do. (I know I’m being vague, but, hopefully, it’ll be clearer during the characters’ decision sharing time) And that’s her story! 🙂
Here’s a sketch I recently did of her:
(And yes, that is a piece of paper on her left shoulder. I may or may not have made a mistake there and then decided gluing paper on would be the best course of action. XD)
LOLLL that was the most Kit possible way to introduce himself XD
@rose-colored-fancy Smh of course it was, he was practically begging to do the reveal all along!Of course I’m supportive of keeping Cal in! Judging by people’s response to Kit, I’m assuming a lot of others will be too, but it’s always good to ask anyways.
I’m really interested to see her backstory/biggest regret (and not just because it’s going to make writing Kit’s marginally less nerve wracking XD)
If everyone else is alright with it, please, please, PLEASE keep her in!
And YES, BEING A CHRISTIAN WRITER IS HARD
But, it’s such an honor to be able to write for the Lord! And it’s so comforting to know that He cares, and he cares about our writing, and He’ll give us the wisdom and guidance we need if we ask Him for help. If we don’t tackle sticky subjects, then we’re just leaving them for the world to portray, which is never a good thing. Obviously, different people are cut out for different types of writing, and for writing different subjects, but as a collective, I think that Christian writers have a responsibility to portray sin, to portray brokenness, to portray tough, DIFFICULT situations, because who else will? Who else is going to speak the truth, and season it with love, and grace, and understanding at the same time?
*laughs as one fey*
Also I’m going to switch up the narrative style a bit because I had an idea for that and I feel like trying it out XD (Update, okay not much changed. I need practice XD)
Ophelia
So, there was nothing else left to do for now except wait for Enydd to return. Oh, speaking of which, she bounded into the room and rummaged around in her bag, apparently delighted to have it back.
She tilted her head and pulled something out. I peered over at her, curious to see what it was.
“Um, hey Jade, Abriami, Ophelia you might want to look at this,” Enydd said, uncertainly.
I knew what bad news sounded like and it definitely had that turn of voice.
I hurried after the others and peered over Jade’s shoulder.
Now, you of course already know what the glass says. Friend and enemy, dinner, greatest regret, all that. I had to admit, to me the most important out of the list was dinner. I was hungry.
Who would be my enemies? Jade had gotten over her animosity, so that left Cal. Did she count as an enemy? I supposed she did, she certainly regarded me that way. I didn’t dislike her at all, but how much of a difference did that make?
“What should we do?” Enydd asked, worry streaking through her voice.
I automatically looked to Jade to solve the problem. Let her figure this out. She was so much smarter and more determined than I was.
”Proceed as planned. Since it’s giving us a meal, we can discuss the issue over dinner while thinking things through in the meantime,” said Jade. “Let’s get a look at this stage and go practice.” She gestured down the hall. “Lead the way, Enydd.”
I nodded and picked up my bag, then bounced after them.
Jade stumbled forward, Isaias caught her just in time.
“The red carpet starts here,” Enydd helped, a little too late.
A red carpet? I glanced down to my feet, there was indeed a red carpet. Odd. I frowned. I’d been backstage before, it was all wires, ropes, and props, besides being much darker than you’d think. There was never a red carpet, just the dancers crowded together in the wings, watching the light on stage. It looked like another world, one of light and motion and color, whereas the wings were frozen in time, tinted with the smell of hairspray and nerves.
I glanced up, then stopped dead in my tracks.
“How did you do this, Enydd?” I asked, breathlessly.
Posters lined the walls, with each of us on them. My gaze caught on my own portrait. I didn’t recall having it taken. I had expected a picture of myself how I looked while onstage, makeup heavy so my features would be visible, a perfect smile as fake as the rest of my features in the touched-up posters. Or at least a portrait of myself as I looked throughout the day, curls perfectly pulled back, looking as happy and unworried as possible.
It wasn’t either of those.
Instead, I stared up at myself the way I must look in practice. Minimal makeup, my hair pulled back in a tight bun, my expression almost stern with concentration. I wasn’t looking at the camera, as though I refused to face it.
I stood rooted to the floor.
“Where did it get that picture?” I asked, my voice sounding tight and false.
It had my full name, Ophelia Schwann, blazoned across the bottom of it. It was right next to Jade’s, in the center, the place of the lead dancers.
I hated it. I wished I could rip it off the walls. It wasn’t me. It was nothing like me. I didn’t want it to resemble me in any way, I didn’t want that to be the part of me up for display. The struggling part, the part who didn’t belong there, the part who could never keep up and never be good enough.
Jade was looking up at her portrait in barely disguised delight. I wished I could be happy about mine as well.
I pass Jade toward the wings and stand there, watching the stage. I dug through my purse and pulled out a raspberry-colored lipstick. The strongest memory I had of my first performance was the taste of too-old lipstick I’d borrowed from my mother. It was the first I’d ever worn.
I didn’t have a mirror, but I didn’t need one. I had done this so often.
Jade stopped next to me. I smiled wanly and offered her the lipstick.
“Would you like to borrow it?”
Jade stared at it as though I’d offered her a loaded gun. My smile faded. I was just trying to share this with her, it was all I could do.
_____________
Also, @e-n-leonard I find it very interesting how different Jade and Ophelia’s relationships to ballet are! It’s pretty much exactly the opposite, which really intrigues me!
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
…
Gay or trans-guyish vibes…? *Shrug* just spitballing!
Ohhh, that’s interesting! For now, she’s told me she’s bi, but goodness knows how indecisive my characters are so we’ll see if she changes her mind somewhere along the line XD
I think all the characters won’t be too keen on talking about their decision. I was thinking that maybe if they refused, the castle would either tell everyone what the decision was (basically narrating it in the most sarcastic, humiliating, guilt laying tone possible), or the castle would show everyone the character making his decision, movie-style.
Ohhh, goodness, that sounds TRAUMATIC I love it!!!! That’ll convince them… Or the alternative is just as interesting. *Kinda wants to make one of my characters refuse just to see what happens*
Also, I can’t wait to find out more about Enydd!!
I’m really interested to see her backstory/biggest regret (and not just because it’s going to make writing Kit’s marginally less nerve wracking XD)
The thought alone makes me so sad 😭😭 Writing it is going to HURT.
But, it’s such an honor to be able to write for the Lord! And it’s so comforting to know that He cares, and he cares about our writing, and He’ll give us the wisdom and guidance we need if we ask Him for help.
Exactly! Plus writing is, at least to me, a way to get to know Him better! I have to put every action of my characters into perspective and think about whether it lines up with what’s right in His eyes, and really think through tough situations!
If we don’t tackle sticky subjects, then we’re just leaving them for the world to portray, which is never a good thing. Obviously, different people are cut out for different types of writing, and for writing different subjects, but as a collective, I think that Christian writers have a responsibility to portray sin, to portray brokenness, to portray tough, DIFFICULT situations, because who else will? Who else is going to speak the truth, and season it with love, and grace, and understanding at the same time?
I never even thought about it that way! That’s honestly so comforting, I love that thought! And I’m so glad you want me to keep Cal in 😀
Without darkness, there is no light. If there was no nighttime, would the stars be as bright?
*including Ehud but like it’s not even relevant to the plot he’s nonbinary and asexual coated but he doesn’t do anything with that so like anybody who wants to notice it cool anybody who wants to be like “that’s just Ehud” also cool, he’s equally cool with it I think he forgot he was queer and literally everybody else notices it more…*
@this-is-not-an-alien huh. I never knew that about Ehud!I recently discovered that four of my characters are ace as well (five if you count Basil in the labs arc, but he doesn’t really count since the staff were deliberately messing with his hormones to get that effect…)
@inkhorn I like that drawing of Enydd! She looks gentle, but really strong and determined at the same time 🙂That’s also a really interesting backstory for her. I’m really curious to know more, but I guess I’ll just have to wait until that regret is revealed XD
*laughs as one fey*
I was thinking that maybe if they refused, the castle would either tell everyone what the decision was (basically narrating it in the most sarcastic, humiliating, guilt laying tone possible), or the castle would show everyone the character making his decision, movie-style.
THAT’S AWFUL!
We have to do it. That’s going to be amazingly traumatic!
Ok so now I low key want to make them refuse…
*laughs as one fey*
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