@taylorclogston
Active 3 years, 6 months ago-
PursueWisdom replied to the topic Guild War…6? in the forum Announcements 7 years, 10 months ago
Hi all!!
I’m not sure if you’ve seen this…
BUT WE WERE GIVEN AN HONORABLE MENTION IN THIS WAR!!!
See https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cELNYNDhdM5o1DcXvFwxkTE29p7MnZtcRzRobNuExzY/edit#
I found that Daeus’s feedback was super helpful – so please read it! 🙂
Anyway, thanks especially to ESJohnson (for doing most of the writing) and Darth…[Read more]
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Sarah Inkdragon replied to the topic Creating a Dystopian Government that isn't Cliche. in the forum Research and Worldbuilding 7 years, 10 months ago
@taylorclogston @evelyn @scartletimmortalized
Thanks! Considering I wrote that at like 1AM, I’m amazed it turned out as coherent as it did…. there is this one part though:
Now, I’m guessing you were raised in an environment that probably does approve of drugs, so neither do you.
*cough*
XD I meant to write doesn’t. 😉 I would go back and ed…[Read more]
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Eden Anderson replied to the topic Creating a Dystopian Government that isn't Cliche. in the forum Research and Worldbuilding 7 years, 10 months ago
*pops head in*
*sees the EXTREMELY LONG posts*
Hahaha! Looks like you’ve got plenty to work with! The Inkredible @sarah-inkdragon has once again turned pilosopher…she’s all you need when it comes to writing advice! Plus add @taylorclogston and @evelyn into the mix and you’ve basically got a whole book on this subject.…[Read more]
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ScarletImmortalized replied to the topic Creating a Dystopian Government that isn't Cliche. in the forum Research and Worldbuilding 7 years, 10 months ago
Ooh thanks! Communism is another nice choice!
@sarah-inkdragon Wow you are amazing. That was beautiful to read. Any recommendations on how my MC should find out?
Oh I was thinking really hard after reading this. One of the big things I see in my life is Safety vs Freedom.
What do you think of a world where it is totally…[Read more]
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R.M. Archer replied to the topic Giving critique in videos! in the forum General Writing Discussions 7 years, 10 months ago
@taylorclogston Cool. I’ll send those over sometime today or tomorrow, then. 🙂
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Livi Ryddle posted a new activity comment 7 years, 10 months ago
@evelyn True.
@obrian-of-the-surface-world Maybe I should paste in the rest of the story. (Below) Me and my friends took turns adding a sentence or two to the starting sentence to write the first couple pages, down to where he knocks himself out, and then I write the rest. It’s kinda a mess right now, and I’m still working on editing it, but maybe…[Read more]-
I’m sorry, lol. I didn’t realize I made so many typing errors!
” he knocks himself out, and then I WROTE the rest.”
“The wad OF money appeared in…”
I think that’s all the ones, lol. I’m not usually this messy!
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Wow. That is hard to determine where any cues might come from because it shifts too many story threads into random directions. Not sure still if I can get a gender decision on the brief part where the Water Sprite shows up. Do you have a backstory in mind for the Water Sprite? That might give you a better idea of which traits might lend…[Read more]
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J.A.Penrose started the topic Holiday Announcement in the forum Annual Theme Discussion 7 years, 10 months ago
We have been going for twenty-eight weeks now. Can I just say, that is insane. I honestly wasn’t expecting the guilds to take off like they did, but now, I’m definitely sold to it.
But anyways. I just wanted to tell you that there will be no more lessons from me until 2019. (I know. Huge break.) We’ll be looking at characters, and I think th…[Read more]
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ESJohnson replied to the topic Guild War…6? in the forum Announcements 7 years, 10 months ago
Also, I’m thinking what if Aleksander’s Son attacks before he has a chance to march out? That means the spirits lied and he now has to make a choice for or against them. Any thoughts?
(And @coggleton , I was going for that David/Absalom vibe…[Read more]
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Livi Ryddle posted an update 7 years, 10 months ago
So I’ve been working on a story recently, and I was wondering what you guys think of this part…
Cornelius had been walking for a while now and thirst threatened to get the best of him. He stooped beside the stream and cupped some water into his hands to drink.
Dang. This water tastes weird. Not bad, but weird.
Smacking his lips, he started…[Read more]
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Ooh, intriguing! 🙂
Does it seem more female or male? Hmm… It feels like it could go either way… it doesn’t feel like one or the other yet, reading through.
Once you pick one gender though, you probably will want to add a quick description in this clip to signify that. -
Oh ho, this seems good *rubs hands together in anticipation*
My mind automatically thought the sprite was male. I could visualize it being all dramatic: ‘Who DARES to summon /The Great Water Sprite/!?’ etc., etc.
And I agree with @evelyn. Once you decide, some description would be helpful 🙂 -
I don’t think it necessarily seems more male or female. Make it a dude though, I feel like all the sprites I read of in stories are girls =P
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@evelyn True.
@obrian-of-the-surface-world Maybe I should paste in the rest of the story. (Below) Me and my friends took turns adding a sentence or two to the starting sentence to write the first couple pages, down to where he knocks himself out, and then I write the rest. It’s kinda a mess right now, and I’m still working on editing it, but maybe…[Read more]-
I’m sorry, lol. I didn’t realize I made so many typing errors!
” he knocks himself out, and then I WROTE the rest.”
“The wad OF money appeared in…”
I think that’s all the ones, lol. I’m not usually this messy!
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Wow. That is hard to determine where any cues might come from because it shifts too many story threads into random directions. Not sure still if I can get a gender decision on the brief part where the Water Sprite shows up. Do you have a backstory in mind for the Water Sprite? That might give you a better idea of which traits might lend…[Read more]
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@anne_the_noob14 No problem! 🙂
By the way, next time it might be easier to start a thread in the Parimi Alca writing discussion section… it’s easier to read and respond to long messages that way. 🙂-
@evelyn Ah, you’re right! Lol I didn’t think of that soon enough 😀
@obrian-of-the-surface-world Right. I haven’t yet thought up a backstory for the Sprite yet. And yes! It does help 🙂 Thanks!
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@anne_the_noob14 I think that this seemed more like a girl. If you want it to be more masculine, though, maybe mention a deep/male voice or something? (I’m sorry it’s taken me forever to see this 😛 I got super behind on emails!)
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*thumbs up* It’s ok, lol. Holidays are always busy for everybody 😛
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J.A.Penrose replied to the topic You Have Arrived at Parimi Alca! in the forum Announcements 7 years, 10 months ago
Just dropping in to say, welcome to our new Parimi!
Everyone make sure we give a stellar welcome to our newest…[Read more]
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PursueWisdom replied to the topic Guild War…6? in the forum Announcements 7 years, 10 months ago
Hi all! I just wanted to take a second here to remind all of us Parimians to review/comment/edit/whatnot on our guild’s draft that the very talented ESJohnson and Darth Pen worked on. 🙂 I see a few of us have already commented which is wonderful; if you haven’t, please look it over so we can make it the BEST!! 😉 (In other words, we need you.…[Read more]
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Steward of the Pen replied to the topic You Have Arrived at Parimi Alca! in the forum Announcements 7 years, 11 months ago
I’m sorry about the delay—you gave me quite a bit to think about and my weekend got a little crazy, so I didn’t have much time to sit down and write a response until now.
I would say yes, I think there are Christians who are like that—although I was not. When I first became a Christian, I was very young and…[Read more]
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J.A.Penrose started the topic Lesson 27 : Raving About Pacing in the forum Annual Theme Discussion 7 years, 11 months ago
Hopefully by now, (sorry newbies) you have got a fair grip on Pacing and Suspense.
Today, you have a super easy task. Name one text, (try to use one that you haven’t before in these lessons) and show how it used pacing and suspense well. Try to be spoiler sensitive!
To help clarify, a text can be a book, poem, movie, song, play, video game,…[Read more]
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ESJohnson replied to the topic Guild War…6? in the forum Announcements 7 years, 11 months ago
Okay, everyone, how about this? The first few paragraphs are coming together!
(And @silverclaw-bonnetfolly , I may be able to incorporate some of your ideas! WHEEE! 😊😊😊)
Father had always told him that there were only two things in this world–light and darkness.
When he dreamed he saw neither.He saw blood and skin and bones, porcelain s…
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Cassie Hartfinh replied to the topic Guild War…6? in the forum Announcements 7 years, 11 months ago
*rushes in from faraway land of Tennessee*
The downside to traveling is I enter the guild war late in the game.
Anyways, guys, I am seeing some STELLAR ideas here!! And now, for MY ideas.
The past three nights, I have dreamed of three things: the first night, somebody said to me “…if you are the New Mercy…”. The second, I was crushing…[Read more]
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OBrian of the Surface World replied to the topic You Have Arrived at Parimi Alca! in the forum Announcements 7 years, 11 months ago
Hi Taylor (@taylorclogston)
Perhaps my experience has shaped a particular perspective that you may disagree with and that is fine.
I have met writers that had great promise in their early works that were later discouraged by writing teachers who were heavy-handed with critiques of their works because of “the rules of writing” were put up too…[Read more]
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Coggleton replied to the topic Fantasy Novella Alpha Readers Needed! in the forum Critiques 7 years, 11 months ago
Ah, gotcha. I guess my question was that since Artorius says “I’ve served my sentence for my crimes”, where in the story did he ever come to view what he did as a crime?
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Coggleton replied to the topic Fantasy Novella Alpha Readers Needed! in the forum Critiques 7 years, 11 months ago
Interesting. Here’s my thoughts:
– If I understand correctly, it seems that your main character is a mind hive (as opposed to a hive mind). Which is fair enough, but the only thing it raises the question of is “Whose character arc is it?” Is it Artorius’? Then is there a moment where he acknowledges the harm his pride/brashness…[Read more]
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OBrian of the Surface World replied to the topic You Have Arrived at Parimi Alca! in the forum Announcements 7 years, 11 months ago
Hi Taylor (@taylorclogston),
To your point…
…If a particular story is by design, not intended for non-believers, do you think that makes a difference?
Imagine for a moment, that you found yourself in an alternate reality, where your very survival depended on your present knowledge and recall of Scripture. How long could you…[Read more]
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OBrian of the Surface World replied to the topic You Have Arrived at Parimi Alca! in the forum Announcements 7 years, 11 months ago
Hi @taylorclogston,
Thank you for your insights. I do know the rules having studied them, graded for them, bought books on them, and practiced them, but I do know there are some stories that do deliberately break the rules and stumble into new pastures. Not many of them but some notable few.
I think audiences have changed in how they ap…[Read more] - Load More
