Story_Guardian

Kallun smiled, gazing into Pia’s eyes, wrapping his long arms around her. “You bet she’s staying.” He tipped his head downward slightly.

K’Nika coughed and looked away, holding a hand by her eyes to keep from watching.

(Hahaha oh yes. Is he super tall with blue hair and everything? XD)

@everyone sorry I haven’t been as active recently!  I think we have so many characters in here that it’s getting hard to establish any new character dynamics besides the relationships we already have.  Also, I have a friend who’s going to be joining Story Embers soon, and I don’t want to just drop her right in the middle of this unbridled chaos l…[Read more]

Slightly shocked at the apology, Julian didn’t take it for granted, “it’s alright.

“I assume you’re staying with us then? I hope so, but we need to go.” Ellie said.

“Wherever it is we’re going,” he mumbled

(Probably. I’m not actually working on this story anymore so I don’t really need to develop my characters further, but it could be fun!…[Read more]

Pia gripped Kallun’s shoulders, but turned slightly. “I really am sorry, Julian. I know I tend to think only of myself a lot of times, and I know I have a hit temper, but I’m trying to deal with it… I’m sorry truly.” She mumbled and turned her head to where she was avoiding everyone’s gaze.

Kallun smiled softly. Pia had never apologized ab…[Read more]

Ellie walked over to Julian,

“Your mom didn’t make it?”

He shook his head.

“I’m so sorry… I’m just thankful my parents weren’t here for the attack.”

“Yeah, who knew royal duties would be life saving.”

“Finn and Lacey?”

“I’m not sure. We got separated.”

Ellie nodded.

Our eyes were locked dead on each other, staring through the chaos that ensued around us. It was an unblinking bridge of pure, numb hate.

Histories of bloodshed and violence could not sum up against the antipathy channelled in this single reciprocated glare.

The background noise lowered to a hum, drowned in the ocean of hatred that crashed…[Read more]

Lorcan

Lorcan could feel a roaring in his head, building to a crescendo. Everything else faded away, his senses centering on Niarok rocking his sister’s body, trying to revive her.

He had the distinct feeling of someone speaking to him. Daire perhaps, though he didn’t care to look. He wouldn’t have the energy to anyway. All he could do was stare…[Read more]

@noah-cochran

You do that.

I’m going to try training it first (I want a dragon mount to rush into battle with) but if that doesn’t work, bring a sword just in case 😉

That sounds excellent! I’m looking forward to seeing it.

I look forward to finishing it XD It’s going to be lovely but it’s also an embodiment of my vast overconfidence in my a…[Read more]

@inkhorn

I’ll say Mejt. She seems like an intriguing character (and she’s got a cool name)

Awesome! I’m leaning toward her too, just because I’ll be writing her story first (probably)

@denali-christianson

Ha! Soooo I neglected to mention this, but I’m going to be fasting tech for Lent, which means I’m not going to be on SE at all…

Okay! Have a go…[Read more]

@everyone

Ha! Soooo I neglected to mention this, but I’m going to be fasting tech for Lent, which means I’m not going to be on SE at all… I don’t have time to read through everyone’s posts, so assume that Evie, Niarok, and Yila’s body just suddenly disappeared as I’m putting them into another part of the Castle and then y’all don’t have to…[Read more]

@joelle-stone

Aw, thanks!! I shall recording chapter one tomorrow. It’s a pretty boring chapter but it explains the backstop of the world and introduces most of the important characters so it’s kind of necessary. I think. My alpha reader thinks it’s awful (thanks again, sis) but it’s still kind of important. I think. Isn’t that right @this-is-not-…[Read more]

@erynne,

GIRL.

I. LOVE. IT.

I MUST READ MORE

@obrian-of-the-surface-world

Wow. Remind me what app you use to record this!?!?

One thing I did notice was that the “its” in this sentence should be “her”

bride extending its fingers

You seem to enjoy descriptions (all of which are gorgeous, BTW!!!!!!!), but remember that descriptions can take out…[Read more]

I loved reading it! He isn’t as nice, but he’s so much more interesting! I like it a lot more!

Thank you! I enjoyed writing him this way.

Who do y’all vote for?

I’ll say Mejt. She seems like an intriguing character (and she’s got a cool name)

@obrian-of-the-surface-world You’re more than welcome! It was a very intriguing scene, and I hope Christie does eventually find Laura!

Thank you, Emily! @emily-waldorf

That is EXACTLY what I was looking for.  I realize my difficulties but sometimes get puzzled on how to break them down and simplify them.
Sometimes I read other works that seem overly poetic and pack in a bunch of layered metaphors so much that they lose the gist of the action.  Allusions, similes, and poetic v…[Read more]

@o-brian-of-the-surface-world

Ah, I see! Perhaps I can help.

It did sound somewhat wordy. In general, I love words and applaud their use, but without the dramatic reading I had the privilege to hear, I think the reader will be a little swamped by them. For instance:

A burst of white light, strobed out of a column of opalescent fire, burning her…[Read more]

@emily-waldorf

Thank you, Emily!

I think I need to chop up some of the lengthy sentences.  Some authors know intuitively where to break them up into fragments that mimic speech, but my mind keeps clawing back to grammar rules.
I noticed that intense scenes in other novels I read are often written in short punchy and clipped prose.  I do have a s…[Read more]

@rose-colored-fancy

Swedish is good! I’m part Swedish. 🙂 That’s pretty! I’d love to meet her, too, so take my vote for what it’s worth, lol–I’m terrible at decisions!