Sir Leeds

@crazywriter This is beautiful! The cadence is really good. Sometimes rhymed poems sound really forced and choppy, but this reads very naturally with a good rhythm that isn’t distracting. The only critique I would have is the last line, but I’d be being nitpicky.  The sentence structure is switched around to fit the rhyme, so it sounds a teeny…[Read more]

@rose-colored-fancy

For bigger, structural changes, it’s essentially outlining it again, but you already know the story so it’s easier the second time around.

I suppose I should do something like that as well.

*Deep sigh*

My sentiments exactly.

Are there any books/media that aged particularly well or poorly for you?

For one thing, I’m better at…[Read more]

@noah-cochran

I like it. (for a minute there I was worried, thinking you had split your book into third and first person or something xD)

Yikes XD

Oh, they’re just glorious.

Right? I’ve been having a few too many XD

So you actually know exactly what you want to change about every individual chapter before you start revision? I was just going to g…

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@rose-colored-fancy

Exactly. I have… three chapters total, I think. For one, Liorah is absent but there’s important information, for the other she’s there but I needed it told through another character’s perspective.

I like it. (for a minute there I was worried, thinking you had split your book into third and first person or something xD)
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@noah-cochran

Interesting. Are the third person limited views quite sparse? Like Skyward’s interludes?

Exactly. I have… three chapters total, I think. For one, Liorah is absent but there’s important information, for the other she’s there but I needed it told through another character’s perspective.

Okay, that’s what I figured you were going for…

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The first book only has one first person POV, (Liorah’s) but it has a few other chapters in third person limited for other characters.

Interesting. Are the third person limited views quite sparse? Like Skyward’s interludes?

That’s my first point. Backstory that isn’t a ghost exists too and it’s important to lend emotional value to the ghost.

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@noah-cochran

I was more saying that they’re overused, and mostly just used to put emphasis on how the main character’s sound different. In other words, the author couldn’t think of any more unique way to describe an accent, so they just said “thick” or “rough” or something like that.

Admittedly, describing accents is hard XD I think the only…[Read more]

@rose-colored-fancy

I don’t think describing an accent (or especially a voice, since I was more describing his voice) as rough is an inherently bad thing, but I will look at it

So, I agree with everything you said, but I wasn’t exactly saying that describing accents in those ways were necessary “bad” or “offensive” things to do, I was more s…[Read more]

@noah-cochran

All those descriptions are polarizing and almost trite because when I read fantasy books it seems that the kind’ve out-of-the-way cultures or non-main character cultures have those less than pleasant accents

See, that’s exactly what I was talking about.

Language is inherently neutral, or at least, should be. Having an accent is jus…[Read more]

@rose-colored-fancy

The words were in the common language, and thankfully, I understood them, despite the strong, clipped accent.

That’s exactly what I was talking about, so great example. 🙂 That’s how I like to describe accents. I guess what I’m needing now is more words to describe accents rather than the normal: rough, thick, gravely, twangy,…[Read more]

@noah-cochran

 I guess what I’m trying to say is that I use accents to help develop character voice, and thus I really only want some of the characters to be defined by a cultural accent.

I get what you’re trying to say, but I don’t know how much it would actually help you with character voice because your reader isn’t really hearing it. The on…[Read more]

@rose-colored-fancy

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t give them an accent, since they probably do have one, but if they get a POV, they can mention how all the others have accents to them. And people from different regions of the same place can always have regional accents.

I usually just describe accents like “They had a (region) accent.…

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@noah-cochran

I was in a hurry and I forgot to mention that “Gilded blood” will be ready to beta-read in late march/early april. The manuscript is 91k and the deadline is preferably end of april, though there’s some slack there.

It’s the second draft, I mainly need story and scene level critique. (Basically what I’ve been doing for TTD)

Will…[Read more]

Trope talk: Accents

@noah-cochran

I can’t have a conversation in that chaos. xD

*Glances around secretively* Oh, we’re whispering? XD Good idea though, but I think you got the wrong forum XD

However, one thing you might notice in my historical fiction is that I don’t mess with religion much. I’ll do it more in this series, but I don’t particularly want to turn th…

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