Jordyn Emma West

@woverinerm @dakota i work with 3 quarter horses, and a paint Arabian cross.

@emberynus-the-dragonslayer

Okay.  But I’ll probably introduce some of the characters first.

@katthewriter

So sorry you’re depressed!

I’d love it if you posted some of your work. 🙂

@taylorclogston

Lots of description and show don’t tell! (That’s like Daeus’ fav) You had some,  but maybe its just me that puts it all over?  Idk….

First week without my friend…

@katthewriter Thanks! What part of writing did I miss?

@caseybold Thank you! Glad to hear it caught your interest. Would you mind sharing the mechanical mistakes? And thanks for the reading out loud advice! It’s a fantastic technique.

@taylorclogston Wow! I was completely drawn into your story. Like I only meant to open the document and glance at it but ended up reading feverishly to the end in a few minutes lol. Some grammar stuff and misspelled words distracted me every once in a while, but the idea and your development of it were solid and captivating. Do you read through…[Read more]

@taylorclogston woooow that was way better than anything i could write! Pretty good!

Though.. you didn’t do much of my fav part of writing..

Hi guys.. not sure how much I’ll be on. I have a i guess contemporary series? Im on the first book but ik that they’ll be at least 7 if not more books.  The stories will get a bit longer as they go with more POV’s. It has all my fav and most worked on characters (mostly blonde traumatized cherries xD) but it’s not that great writing or…[Read more]

@wolverinerm

I agree! It’s so sad!!! But I’m hoping to change that. 😉

@jeremydvance Thank you for the advice!

@taylorclogston

I would look at repeated words within the same sentence or paragraph. I feel you are trying to do this for emphasis, but it comes off as a little distracting. Try to eliminate unnecessary words to tighten the story.  Press on in your writing!

@wolverinerm

Yeah. I like the World Wars.

But I also like ancient history. My favorite has always been Roman history.

@taylorclogston I think that you should mention more of his surroundings, and maybe something about the service. Perhaps have him think that something the pastor said would contradict his secret.

but I think that you wouldn’t necessarily have to add anything. It’s up to you

@gabrielwoods Thank you! What do you think the funeral scene needs to be more complete?

@emberynus-the-dragonslayer Ooh, sounds promising already! 😀

@wolverinerm I’m sure it will! 😄

I think your story was good, maybe you could add a little bit more to the scene at the funeral, it was really short but beside that, I thought it was pretty good. In a really sad way.

@wolverinerm

Hey again!

I love Quarter horses and Arabians too!