Jordyn Emma West

@melodyjoy

Haha totally get that!! Happens to me a lot lol! 😉

@devastate-lasting

Yup!

Thanks!

MEL

@melodyjoy Oh okay I see. Different tenses would make a difference *thumbs up*

@devastate-lasting

Well, I usually write in first person and still use thoughts. I had this big long thing in my brain about like since I am writing in past tense and the thought is present. idk haha it was random

@beth20

It didn’t italicize the wreck sentence (lol) because I copied and pasted from my document and italics never transfer. I must…[Read more]

@melodyjoy

Thanks for tagging me! I didn’t read it until now, and I thought it was really good.😄 It’s a first draft, and everyone else had good suggestions, so it’ll smooth out. Can’t wait to read more.

@wolverinerm

Wow! Your characters seem so…real. They’re thought out (much better than most of mine😄) and I almost feel like I could actually meet them sometime in some airport or something.😂

Keith especially sounds fun. Horses, and a Blue Heeler.😍 That’s my type.😂

And Harley sounds great too. I have a main character who is also a ISTP…he’s…[Read more]

@devastate-lasting

Really? I always use italisized thoughts, third or first person.

@melodyjoy

Really liked it! If you post more be sure to tag me!

Just some things I noticed.

When you said, I probably look like a wreck.  You didn’t italicize it. If you follow Linyang’s advise, then you don’t have to italicize it. But, you have to keep it co…[Read more]

@melodyjoy Thanks so much for tagging me!!

I love how real this feels, like I just watched Chloe doing all this stuff. And I totally feel for her in some people just not being draining. 😅

Honestly, the only thing I can think to change is smoothing out a couple places…

“I pulled a boxed dinner from the freezer and placed it in the microwave. I…[Read more]

@arindown, and @everybody

Ahhh, thanks for this!! And wow, I love reading about everybody’s characters!! This is such a fun thread…

Okay, I have kind of a big cast of characters without realizing it, so I’ll just touch on my four most important…

Harley Keane: my POV character. He’s 18, slightly shorter than average, baby-faced with blue-…[Read more]

Awesome I’ll try and read this soonly! Thanks for the tag!

@melodyjoy I like your writing voice! It’s very clear and consistent. One thing that I think would help is, since you’re writing in first person, I don’t think there’s any needs to bring in italicized thoughts. Just change them to more inner monologue. I think that would smooth it out. Otherwise, nice job! 🙂

@melodyjoy

Sounds like a really cool story! I love it. I haven’t reread it yet, I’ll let you know if I find anything wrong with it.

@eden-anderson Ahhh thank you! Truthfully I don’t think much of world-building because I don’t use the setting as much as I should haha…

Your characters sound so sweet! I’d love to know more about your story!

@emma-starr Absolutely! I’ll let you know. 😊 Thanks for offering!

Aw, really?! I took piano lessons when I was younger but I quit after about a year and never took it up again. I kind of wish I would have kept going…

Currently, I don’t play any instruments, but I’m hoping to learn the guitar! And I’d really, really, really love to play the…[Read more]

@melodyjoy

Awesome can’t wait to read it!

@beth20 @devastate-lasting @arindown @emberynus-the-dragonslayer @eden-anderson @emma-starr @wolverinerm @chalice

Everybody!

I’ve finished the first half of chapter 1 of my story. I’ll post it as another topic and tag ya’lls in it.

Please, comment and give tips. I wanna make sure it sounds good before I get to far into the writing. (I’m sure y…[Read more]