[Kimmi]

                                                                           What Else Can I Do?

I lean against the door post, looking through the cracked door at my little sister. Sitting on her bed, squeezing a penguin to her chest. I stand there, my heart pounding. I don’t want to be the one to tell her. I don’t want to be the one who finally crashes her world in two.

I swallow hard and make my leaden legs step forward. The white door swings quietly open. She looks up, her dark hair falling over her green cardigan. Her brown eyes search my face. Her mouth is tight. Already knowing.

I lower my head, stepping over her backpack, before slipping onto the pale comforter to sit beside her. My own eyes burn, and my mouth feels dry as I try to form the words. She pulls her legs up and crosses them, the penguin now in her lap. Tears are behind her eyes. She knows what I’m going to say, but is trying to be strong.

I don’t want to be the one who makes her cry. For the tears to slide down her cheeks, and for her to bury her face as her shoulders shake. But I can’t do anything to make it better.

I get flashbacks now. Of just a few days ago. That Christmas night. When everything fell apart. With our parents shouting. With no hope. Hiding in our rooms. Knowing everything would come to an end.

She squeezes her pillow now and shoves her face in it, screaming when I tell her. Told her they were done. That it was over. That I would take care of her. Her muffled cries echo in my ears. Screams I wish to let go as well. Screams my lips and lungs beg to be free of.

All the sweet memories going away, turning into scars. There was nothing I could do to make it better.

I didn’t want to see the pain on her face. I didn’t want to see her heart broken in two. But here I was. Watching her face turn red, and the tears make salty stains on her pillows.

I didn’t know what to do. I lay beside her, squeezing her from the side. Fighting my own tears, they finally slip as I watch my sister. My precious sister.

I nuzzle her face with my own and her arms wrap around me. Her soft sweater brushes my bare arms. She holds me tighter than I ever remember, and I squeeze her back.

And we weep together.

___

“For my father and my mother have forsaken me,

but the Lord will take me in.

Teach me your way, O Lord,

and lead me on a level path

because of my enemies.

Give me not up to the will of my adversaries;

for false witnesses have risen against me,

and they breathe out violence.

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord

in the land of the living.

Wait for the Lord;

be strong, and let your heart take courage;

wait for the Lord.”

~Psalm 27:10-14

 

___

Disclaimer: Work of Fiction

Jominkreesa

'Forth now! And fear no darkness!'

[Cathy]

That…yeah.

That was painfully beautiful ❤️💔❤️‍🩹

Kimmi wrote:

Disclaimer: Work of Fiction

heheh…

To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.

[Brian Stansell]

Kimmi,

That is amazing and heart-wrenching.  Very evocative and poignant.  Great job!

Some pain can only be mitigated by being present and connected.

Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. [Romans 12:15 NLT]

Brian Stansell (aka O'Brian of the Surface World)
I was born in war.
Fighting from my first breath.

[Kimmi]

Thank you! <3

Jominkreesa

'Forth now! And fear no darkness!'

[Author]

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