I did wonder whether their tardiness had to be better explained, and your insight confirms it. The idea was that only Wren is truly aware of the danger, thanks to her nursemaid, but being a little girl and wanting to please her friend, she is easily guiled into staying out longer. I will revise the story to convey that…[Read more]

Hope you enjoy it!

https://www.dropbox.com/s/tsimipvyfeix7qf/The%20Smilers%20of%20Carmadyne.docx?dl=0

Thank you. I will leave a link to the story below for you whenever you have the time.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/tsimipvyfeix7qf/The%20Smilers%20of%20Carmadyne.docx?dl=0

Here is the revised version.

Every night, from dusk to dawn, Carmadyne town is invaded by mysterious humanoids. In fear of the creatures, no person ventures from their homes until the sunrise. Nine-year-old Wren complies with the curfew without questioning the reason behind it— until one night, when she decides to ask her n…[Read more]

Thank you both for responding. I will be sure to consider your feedback and advice.

Thank you both for the feedback.

Thank you. I really don’t know how this keeps happening. 😛

https://www.dropbox.com/home?preview=Prologue.docx

Thank you for the feedback. I do see ways I could foreshadow the kidnapping a little more, because it is such a big part of the story.

Hmm, Zrorar… I put him into the beginning as a brief example of how adored and desired Phoenix was. He isn’t really supposed to have an actual role beyond that, and I think that expanding on his…[Read more]

Thank you! I’m glad you liked it.

Thank you! I would greatly appreciate it.

Next weekend would work great, but again, you can come to it whenever you have time.

I appreciate the reply. I don’t have much of a deadline, and hopefully at least one person can critique it for me, so we’ll just see what happens.

@urwen-starial @anne_the_noob14 @taylorclogston @sam-m

https://www.dropbox.com/s/kgyq2n246ez2az0/The%20Vampire%20of%20the%20Opera%20%28submission%20version%29.docx?dl=0

That makes sense.

Here’s my email address: XenaGrant34@yahoo.com

I am comfortable with email, though wouldn’t you just post the content here or on your blog?

I would love to read more like this! All of the brief examples sound fun. Keep at it!

It was hilarious, but I think that it ended too quickly. I’m not sure that it needs much action, just more dialogue. I’m not saying that action wouldn’t work (the author making orcs show up just to scare Lucas would be pretty funny), just that the main theme was about an argument between author and character.

Is this scene taken…[Read more]

Hello again, Esther! Thank you for tagging me. First of all, I would be interested in being a core beta-reader. I really love reading stories, but also helping writers hone their works!

Now I am off to read the flash fiction (it already sounds fun).

Vampires. They’re dark, they’re bloodthirsty, they’re— emo? Well, that does seem to be the favorite trend nowadays. In literature and on the screen, vampires are portrayed as chisel-faced drama-queens. Hopefully most of us know that wasn’t how vampires…[Read more]

Which story are you talking about?

That’s alright, we all have busy periods.
I’m glad you liked the second half! I do not use GoogleDocs, but I do use Dropbox now whenever I need it.

I’m more amused than worried, but that is good to know.

Those are good points. Thank you for reading the story!

Thank you! You may tell me what I did right (what writer doesn’t want to hear that?), but please don’t hold back if you see something problematic.

I haven’t seen ET, and naturally get a lot of fire for that. That being said, the story plot for ET sounds a LOT like my story. They even share wounds? I actually based the monster’s appearance more off of a thumbnail I had seen of Slenderman.

Well, in the early stages of writing the story, I had several directions I could go for…[Read more]

Thank you for the feedback! It was extremely helpful, and I admit I laughed a couple of times at the way you phrased some of the flaws. I was not ever trying to be corny, but now I certainly see it. The alternate ending with Olivia sounds appealing, but it also sounds a bit convenient, not to mention a tad outside her character to…[Read more]

Thank you. Are there alternatives for people who don’t have a Google account?

I’m not sure who to tag, so I think I will just throw this post to the winds and hope someone in this group catches it. Thank you!

Wasn’t that one Loki-and-Odin-scene in the weapons vault so sad? I love rewatching Thor just to see the parts with Loki in it. The same with Bucky and Cap in Civil War.

Yes, that would be chronological order. You’ll have to tell me what you think when you watch 1, 2, and 3. 🙂

You haven’t seen the original trilogy yet? Nice– you don’t have that as a bias to judge the prequels. What did you think about the acting in the prequels?

If you have a library nearby you can probably check out the movies there.
I haven’t seen the ninth Star Wars movie yet, and frankly I would rather wager on The Mandalorian and Rogue On to have the Star Wars vibe than Rise of Skywalker. The seventh and eighth were a major blow, especially when I kept spotting scenes directly…[Read more]

*Pats you on the back* There, there. Might I suggest watching the Avengers series in the order that they came out? I did, and the story made a lot of sense that way.

Thank you! The lover’s name was never told. *Pumps fist* Yes! I was trying to create some conflict there, and show it through Owl’s thoughts and feelings. I do have…[Read more]

Did you read the story (hint hint)? ;P

I shall neither confirm nor deny your fears, though Bucky and Loki (and Black Widow) are my favorite Marvel characters/villains/Avengers.

I have several:

“I understood that reference.”
“On your left.”
“When did you become an expert in nuclear astrophysics?” “Last night.”
“Don’t look at me, I do what he does, just slower.”

Ohhh, right. I was so upset when I saw Captain America: First Avenger. And then I watched Winter Soldier and I forgave Marvel. 😉 Winter Soldier is incidentally my favorite Marvel movie, mostly for its endlessly-spectacular fight scenes and soundtrack.

Loki is definitely my favorite Marvel villain, though I wouldn’t go so far as…[Read more]

Are you talking about Bucky or Loki?
I’ve watched everything up to Avengers: Endgame. What about you?

He has no filter– in the funny way. 😉 I can never choose between Bucky Barnes and Loki for my favorite Marvel character (like with extrovert and introvert, it varies with each day), but Black Widow is definitely my favorite Avenger.

In one word, Avatar: the Last Airbender is epic. I know that that word is overused, but it…[Read more]

I can’t honestly say that I’m all extrovert or all introvert. It drastically varies day to day. I might hide at home for a whole week, and then on the eighth day dance endlessly at a wedding reception. I do love dancing, but there aren’t many opportunities to do so beyond jamming at home.
I love live action movies/tv shows (have I…[Read more]

Well, other than writing, of course, I love weightlifting and singing. I am trying to get better at scream-singing (yes, like a metal singer), but I also love clean singing. I love participating in events at church. As you might guess from the above comment, I love most subgenres of metal and rock music, and alternative. If I…[Read more]

Dagger: *Touches his forehead in Rhioe’s wake* A pleasure to meet you again, miss. Well, I didn’t know that I belonged to Kenem now.

Annie: Oh come on, you know she meant the dagger, Dagger.

Dagger: *Glances down at illustration in open page of book* Great Madam Contrary, that is a lot of eyeliner.

Dagger: Heh. ‘Dagger’s dagger’. Here, love. *Drops dagger in Annie’s hands*

Annie: *Sputters* Hey, don’t give it to me! What if he comes back?! *Jogs over to Kirat and holds it out to him* Here, take it. *Sees guide to pirate speak* Ooh! Is that a pirate book?