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( *coughs* don’t kill me xD)

@kari-karast @selah-chelyah @kayla-skywriter @naiya-dyani @jessi-rae @e-b-rauland @dakota @ellen-blanc @anyoneelse

My phone hummed as a text came in. Shuffling closer to the wall I flipped out my phone. The notification at the top said

Brian

Hey Yuri… 

I smiled. Brian. As in cutest tallest blondest guy I’d ever seen. As in biggest popularity and best basketball player of the whole school. As in whitest smile and best laugh. And out of all the models, cheerleaders, that follow him like crazy, he chose me. Me, the lowest class person in my whole school. The only one who was in a foster home,  the only one with scars. But he said he liked me just the way I was, that I was beautiful underneath. And I’m trying to trust what he says.

I click on the notification, it taking me to our chat where we yesterday were talking about if we should have matching colors for prom.

Hey Yuri… 

I’m sorry

I frown, watching as it shows he’s typing more.

I can’t keep faking 

I don’t actu like you 

A friend dared me 2 take you 2 prom, so i said i would 

I froze wishing the little dots would stop. Stop typing. What? Please…no Brian..you said… My mind cluttered with choked answers, but my frozen fingers couldn’t type them. His continued.

But i can’t go through with this. I’m can’t go to prom with you

I can’t keep acting like you’re prettier than you actually are 

Honestly your scars really freak me out. Like why did you even let someone do that? Or are the rumors true and you just like to torture yourself to get attetion? 

Either way it’s sick. U look ugly & hideous

Like someone in a creepy murderer in a horror movie. 

Why do you even keep going when u look like that?  

You should just kill yourself 

A little message popped up at the bottom saying ‘you can no longer message this user’ but I could barely see it, my eyes blurred with tears. Liar. He lied. And worse I had actually believed him. I didn’t listen to my motto. I decided I could trust him. And now I’lll pay for it. Just another part of my fragile heart ripped to shreds again.

‘You should kill yourself‘ echoed in my head, tears streaming down my face. All the names I had been called echoing in my head.

Stupid.

Ugly.

Hideous.

Worthless. 

Trash. 

No good.  

Not worth it. 

Ugly. 

Loser. 

Ashamed. 

Creepy. 

Monster. 

I curled up in a ball, as my tears quickly subsided, as if I was not even worth crying over. A heavy blanket of dred crushed down on me.

...maybe he is right…