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Rose replied to the topic Hello! Is anybody in the mood to critique a short story? š in the forum Fantasy Writers 4 years, 8 months ago
So sorry about the posts not being all in one post! I just realized they wouldnāt post as one, bc I was trying to include a couple links, and they wouldnāt go through. You donāt have to reply to all of that LOL ā its overwhelming, haha
Don’t worry about it, it’s totally cool! š SE is a bit glitchy now and then š
How was camping? Hope it was fun!
Classical stuff IS tough: I can definitely vouch for thatĀ Ā And I love listening to folk music! I havenāt played any yet, so I think Iāll ask my teacher about it. Ohhhh, and I listened to those songs, and they are BEE-U-TEE-FUL!! I absolutely love that sound! Just watching the harpistsā fingers on the strings; oh man, it was brilliantĀ Ā I havenāt listened to a lot of harp music and had no idea it was such a great solo instrument.
I know right! They’re such pretty songs! In my opinion, the harp is awesome as a solo instrument, but an ensemble of harps is the most heavenly sound! It’s incredible! I’ve actually done ensembles once or twice for recitals and it’s really fun!
Ooh, if you want to hear a really pretty one, look up “I’m going to make a cake” by Philip Glass, played by a harp ensemble! (Literally the most insane title for that dramatic piece XD) (You can actually find my teacher’s ensemble playing this on YouTube. It’s the Zwolle Harp ensemble and that version is epic!!)
I think my favorite songs to play are Ahsoka Tanoās Theme, Anakinās Suffering, Canon in D, and anything Swing. Ahsoka Tanoās Theme is the most advanced song I know, and I love it!Ā Iāve almost got the Ahsoka one memorized, and Iām still learning Anakinās. They are two of my favorite STAR WARS characters, and I think part of the reason I love those songs is bc I am emotionally attached to them. Anakinās Suffering is actually a combination of 4 different themes, and together they tell the story of his life! John Williams is amazing.
I just looked those up and they’re so pretty! I love Ahsoka’s theme, it’s amazing! It’s so cool that you can play that!
Oh, and do you like to compose? Iāve composed a few short themes, just for fun (if I was assigned composing, I probably wouldnāt like it half as much lol)
I haven’t in quite a while, but I used to! I’ve composed a handful of pieces (All kinda terrible or so complicated I never wrote them down XD) but it’s really fun!
Oh, he sounds awesome! I just love characters like that, the ones who try so hard to be better than they were (bc they used to be really awful XD). And I know too little about all of my characters, less than I should
He’s totally one of my favorite characters, he’s just been through so much and he’s trying so hard and– *Sentimental sniff* XD I just want him to be happy! *Also me: How can I make him suffer more!!??* LOL XD
Oooo, and Chantara is epic! Sympathetic villains are some of the best! The fact that you made her loyal to her friends is really interesting, and adds an extra layer of depth. I am sorta tired of the villains who throw away their accomplices, although I guess that just shows how evil they are XD
I really love that about her because it forces you to see that she’s also a victim, and that if things had gone differently, she would have been a completely different person. It kind of forces you out of the black-and-white mindset that tends to dehumanize villains. They’re creepier if they’re human and slightly relatable!
I’m planning to add at least one chapter from her POV and it’s going to be so awesome because the entire first half you’ve seen nothing except her being incredibly cruel, calculating, and honestly terrifying, and then there’s this chapter where she comes back and finds out one of her friends died and she’s just completely vulnerable and grief-stricken and it’s the polar opposite of what you’ve seen so far. It’s going to be awesome! XD
Oh, that sounds pretty similar to my method! I just think of a tale, and then add characters as I see fit. When it came to my current WIP, I knew that I wanted a band of odd characters to unite on a mission, so my brain just went wild from there. Recently, I added a porcupine person to the mix, LOL
Yep! That’s it! Odd bands of characters are the best though XD
Yes, exactly! Thatās why she wears a head-wrap when she canāt wash her hair, LOL
Brilliant solution! I just love when authors address this stuff in books, it makes it feel much more real!
Like, I recently read a book where the MC needed to hide that she was a girl (for plot reasons XD) and the author mentioned how she was worried about people noticing blood on her laundry during *that* time XD That just makes it feel so much more real and I always wonder about it when it isn’t mentioned XD
Oooh, yay! I love a good mix of goodies and greys and baddies!
Yes! Even better when the characters who were baddies are no longer baddies and the greys have gone to extremes andĀ character development!!Ā
I am speechless!! That sounds just like something Iād love!! Combining different epic ideas is one of the best ways to make a unique story! I wish there were more stories out there just like the one you described.
Thank you so much! It’s going to be so awesome and I’m so excited! I was actually getting worried that it was getting too chaotic but I think I can make it work š
LOL, i was just thinking, “What cool stuff can I shove on top of all my emotional baggage to make it less dark and personal?” XD (Hint, it’s still going to be too dark and personal, probably XD)
Thank you so much!!Ā Ā Hmm, I think my favorite part might be the worldbuilding, and getting to write about a whole bunch of wonderfully odd characters (dialogue rocks). Iām only a few chapters in, haha, but I canāt wait to get to the good parts! And I think Iām a panster; I do outline a little bit, making a skeleton, but then I just brainstorm
That’s awesome! Yes! Odd characters with funny dialogue is the best! And I relate to wanting to get to the good parts XD
I LOVE WRITER HUMOR!! And I totally get talking in detail about upsetting stuff, lol. I think itās interesting: such as the fact that when Egyptians would mummify people, theyād pull their brains out through their noses. If some random person saw a writerās search history, the writer would be like āIām not a serial killer, I promise! Iām just an author!ā XD
YES! I mean, last time I went on a rant about how a poison scene in a book was incorrect people seemed concerned. Why? You mean most people don’t know how poisons affect you and why they work the way they do? Shocking. XD
And yes! Researching weird stuff is a must XD and googling the definitions of super common words XD












