Does my world have too many details?
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Hi everyone!
@joy-caroline @rusted knight @Brian Stansell (or @O’brian-of-the-surface-world) @laugh-as-one-fey @anyone-elseI have a WIP world that I’m creating, and i was wondering if i have too many details (prepare for long rant on a made up world lol):
My guiding principles are that people(humans) are born with different gifts (called bestowals) depending on what astronomical phenomena or constellations they are born under. As a result, the timing of births is planned and controlled so thoroughly that royalty is able to have almost exclusively ‘bestowed’ children.
My second guiding principle is that when humans die, they turn into stone instead of decomposing. This isn’t a natural part of the world, but rather a spell cast on humanity by (*surprise!*) the villain, so i’m unsure if that is necessarily a guiding principle.
Both of these go along with my theme/guiding question of the nature of destiny and how much free choice we have when so much is out of our control.
I decided that the god-figure in this world would be a pantheon of 12 different gods, organized into three groups based on water, land, and sky with the most powerful god in each section forming the nucleus of the pantheon (or four groups of three w/o one god being the most powerful over all the rest and including fire maybe? idk.) with constellations/phenomena representing each one and the various categories of bestowals they give based on the traits of each element.
My worries come in once I start adding in other fantasy races. my first race is humans, which is the o.g. race descended from one of three brothers. They are humans, merfolk, and nagas (like a mermaid but has a snake tail).
Each race is descended from the first three families that formed after the first man and woman (no clue what they’re names are) gave birth to two sets of triplets, one all boys, one all girls, and one of both sexes having wings, a snake tail, or a mermaid tail.
- Humans
- They once had wings and became the most powerful of all the races, being so close to the constellations they were able to receive a wide variety of gifts and used their power to dominate the world. they got too proud and all of them became so corrupt their wings were taken from them, and they looked like normal humans, making them the weakest of the races. Like a great flood situation.
- Their leader, Eldin, along with his brother, lead most of the humans away and they sequestered themselves on an island far from the other races.
- Mermaids
- Their form can change depending on the seasons and moon cycles, getting legs again at certain times.
- Their bestowals aren’t as varied as the humans are, but they are extremely powerful, their hair is a living part of their bodies that actually causes intense pain to them when it’s cut, and it can grow to massive lengths when they sing, the bestowals revolving around that, and their powers always have to pull from something. like if they sing, their songs are based on the desires of the listener’s heart, and if they haven’t been sung a song already, they drain the life of the listener.
- The humans know about them and distrust them, as mermaids sometimes have a seemingly purposeless desire to kill humans. (it’s because their people are hunted and captured to use in dark magic, which I’ll explain soon)
- Nagas
- I wanted to kinda turn the trope of snakes symbolizing evil on its head by having the Nagas be wise healers, but powerful and frightening warriors.
- they live in a jungle around a massive network of caves. they have a largely oral tradition of sharing information, but when something is taken by and large as good advice, a good story, or a true historical event, they carve it onto the wall of the caves, mining deeper into the mountain with human laborers (they pay them handsomely) as more information is accumulated. their histories are the most accurate you can find as they are constantly maintaining even the oldest of carvings.
- they are gifted in medicine as well. largely because they are venomous, and sometimes accidents happen, as well as living for about a thousand years and learning a lot on how to care for the world better over that long lifetime. They developed antivenoms and cures for many diseases. (one of my protagonists actually seeks them out for this purpose).
- Their bestowals are mostly types of venom, and what kind of knowledge their best suited for, like a doctor versus a hunter.
Also, I really want to add Centaurs that would be nomadic and while welcoming, not value human life so much and keep them as slaves to do their bidding and tasks a centaur isn’t the best cut out for. But I feel like it’d be way too much, even though i really want to include them and have them send ‘defective’ humans to the Nagas, and hence divide the gods into four groups, but i don’t know if that’s the best idea.
The villain uses dark magic by creating spells using parts of the different races and humans with bestowals, controlling things in the background to accumulate more power and preserve his life.
My main concern is that these fantasy races diverge a little too far from my guiding principle and bloat the world. I don’t want this to be the case, but I really didn’t want there to just be humans alone either.
Anyway, thank you for reading my rant on my world in progress, please let me know if this is too much. Thank you again!
We crazy people are the normal ones.
If anyone sees this, you don’t have to respond, I have to re-figure out my guiding principle because I found that it’s not the best choice to include something that might be taken as promoting astrology. So, sorry about that and to any parties disturbed or offended.
We crazy people are the normal ones.
*Stumbles in, slurping coffee in wild speckled pjs*
Story, story precious?
More alien-human shortstory updates? No? No storyses?
I like worldbuilding races – maybe if you only focus on one or two but have the other’s pass through occasionally and explore them more in a different book?
…
More stories, precious…? 🥺
To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
Thank you!
About the sci-fi story I was working on: I want to finish it, but I need to take a step back from it for a while since I need to rework so many aspects of it that it’s overwhelming and exhausting at the moment, especially since I went the wrong way about starting it (no outline or even an ending in mind 😬). So, it turned into a stew of I have no clue what I’m doing there’s so many dang rewrites I have to do, since my original plan for it was to make it a single short story for my English final before graduating home-highschool. But my characters were like puppies, I couldn’t just abandon them! So I will finish the story, I just need a moment to step back and do a little work here and there on some other projects just so I can tackle the story with new eyes.
Among my major rewrites, I decided that it’d be better to just turn it into a novel, and then potentially break it up into bite-sized pieces, and rework aspects of the world to turn it into a fantasy instead of relying on *confetti* ✨science did it!✨ (*insert party kazoo*). I decided to have portals exist as the source of power and transportation, as well as enabling people to gain supernatural abilities and for people to be able to reconnect their souls to different things. But the problems are:
- where would cyborgs fit? Those guys are pretty vital to a part of the plot (*disembodied vioce whispering the age-old ‘kill your darlings’ in my ear*) I think?
- How do they do the whole soul disconnect reconnect thing that would make metal exoskeleton-type-things possible, but I feel like it’s a little far-fetched.
- What does the technology look like with these changes?
- How does society look with these changes? (thinking that the wealthiest people just keep on putting their soul into new bodies before they die, pretty inhumane…)
Do you have any ideas?
So, yes, yes storyses, precious, just taking longer because unprepared and brain gone maggoty yessss.
We crazy people are the normal ones.
@this-is-not-an-alien
SPOILER OF UTMOST IMPORTANCE:Marian and her cyborg roommate Tammi have a pet cat with a bionic tail named Stumpy. Tammi likes to tinker and add modifications to bionics. Tammi got bored and added lights to Stumpy’s tail. Now he has taillights and chases them when they’re turned on.
We crazy people are the normal ones.
Yeeah, Tammi didn’t think that through… but it’s funny and an accidental pun.
We crazy people are the normal ones.
About the sci-fi story I was working on: I want to finish it, but I need to take a step back from it for a while since I need to rework so many aspects of it that it’s overwhelming and exhausting at the moment, especially since I went the wrong way about starting it (no outline or even an ending in mind 😬). So, it turned into a stew of I have no clue what I’m doing there’s so many dang rewrites I have to do, since my original plan for it was to make it a single short story for my English final before graduating home-highschool. But my characters were like puppies, I couldn’t just abandon them! So I will finish the story, I just need a moment to step back and do a little work here and there on some other projects just so I can tackle the story with new eyes.
Oh I get that on an existential level XDD
where would cyborgs fit? Those guys are pretty vital to a part of the plot (*disembodied vioce whispering the age-old ‘kill your darlings’ in my ear*) I think? How do they do the whole soul disconnect reconnect thing that would make metal exoskeleton-type-things possible, but I feel like it’s a little far-fetched. What does the technology look like with these changes? How does society look with these changes? (thinking that the wealthiest people just keep on putting their soul into new bodies before they die, pretty inhumane…)
Never kill darlings, darling, just put them somewhere else *nods satisfied like a British feme murderess sipping on wine in her drapsy jewels while stroking her cat elegantly*
That is far-fetched scientifically in this world but if you create a world with completely different rules or even a science-y “magic system” (read “that’s just how your world works and your readers have no choice but to accept that”) then it’s perfectly believable as long as you keep your rules consistant!
Maybe the soul-disconnect is still very experimental and on the low down like a CIA WIP that could kill you 🙂
So, yes, yes storyses, precious, just taking longer because unprepared and brain gone maggoty yessss.
*highfives in procrastinating my WIP by replying to you 😌👌*
SPOILER OF UTMOST IMPORTANCE: Marian and her cyborg roommate Tammi have a pet cat with a bionic tail named Stumpy. Tammi likes to tinker and add modifications to bionics. Tammi got bored and added lights to Stumpy’s tail. Now he has taillights and chases them when they’re turned on.
I have nothing to say but that I love it, the chaos is so potent 😂
To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
That is far-fetched scientifically in this world but if you create a world with completely different rules or even a science-y “magic system” (read “that’s just how your world works and your readers have no choice but to accept that”) then it’s perfectly believable as long as you keep your rules consistant!
Maybe the soul-disconnect is still very experimental and on the low down like a CIA WIP that could kill you 🙂
Thank you for the input!
I think that cyborgs are mostly just an extension of the highly advanced society that values skill and tech. Marian’s roomate is a prime example as she’s a cyborg, and chose to become one because she was crippled at birth.
And I think I’m going to go with the use of that soul-magic (no idea what else to call it) on the low-down, and the characters slowly discover it.
*Sips tea while stroking dog that thinks he’s a little lap gremlin from the victorian era paintings* I found a way to not kill my darlings, darling. At least I hope so…
Also, thank you so much for showing so much interest in my WIP. I know it’s a bit silly of me to say this, but you actually enjoying and showing interest in my story has helped me to get out of my writer’s block. So thanks!
How’s your WIP going?
We crazy people are the normal ones.
Thank you for the input! I think that cyborgs are mostly just an extension of the highly advanced society that values skill and tech. Marian’s roomate is a prime example as she’s a cyborg, and chose to become one because she was crippled at birth. And I think I’m going to go with the use of that soul-magic (no idea what else to call it) on the low-down, and the characters slowly discover it.
Absolutely! ✌️
That sounds like it’ll work great in your story!!!
Also, thank you so much for showing so much interest in my WIP. I know it’s a bit silly of me to say this, but you actually enjoying and showing interest in my story has helped me to get out of my writer’s block. So thanks! How’s your WIP going?
It doesn’t sound silly at all! That’s what helps me out of writer’s block too!! ❤️
My WIP whewwwwww lol I’ve been working on it for years but I think I’ve kinda got the feel for it now and breaking down a wayy too large plot lol! I’ve got a couple writers reading it a chapter at a time and giving me feedback to keep me focused XD So so far so good I just started trying that!
To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
My WIP whewwwwww lol I’ve been working on it for years but I think I’ve kinda got the feel for it now and breaking down a wayy too large plot lol! I’ve got a couple writers reading it a chapter at a time and giving me feedback to keep me focused XD So so far so good I just started trying that!
That’s awesome!
I can relate to having to break down a super large plot, I have a story that’s been stewing in the back of my head for years now — well, mostly a collection of characters — and I’ve been holding off on writing their story since i really want to flesh out their world first. (it’s actually the one I started this topic on lol)
What’s your story about?
We crazy people are the normal ones.
That’s awesome! I can relate to having to break down a super large plot, I have a story that’s been stewing in the back of my head for years now — well, mostly a collection of characters — and I’ve been holding off on writing their story since i really want to flesh out their world first. (it’s actually the one I started this topic on lol)
Thanks 🥰
Yeahhhhhh lol it’s such a big story I’ve thought about putting it down before but it’s so important to me and helped me get through a rough patch in my life.
What’s your story about?
It’s high-fantasy psychological thriller about a fugitive prince with Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder whose born with unique powers and it’s a puzzle style thriller as he tries to stop a cult and a huge intrigue under the surface deeply tied to his past!
A lot of the story revolves around controversial or triggering topics such as racial tensions, lgbtq+, self-harm, abuse etc juxtaposed with what is real authentic love, and moral questions involving high duress and trauma.
If you want I can post the first chapter if it might be something you’re interested in? 🙂
To be a light to the world you must shine in the darkness.
Yeahhhhhh lol it’s such a big story I’ve thought about putting it down before but it’s so important to me and helped me get through a rough patch in my life.
I totally get that! I have stories that feel pretty similar (my WIP wound up becoming a way to unpack how I felt about certain situtations in my life actually lol)
Your WIP sounds so interesting! I would love to read it, but I’ve never read anything equating a thriller before. What are thrillers like? I know nothing about the genre.
We crazy people are the normal ones.
- Humans
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