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Ok… I tried posting this before and was not seeing it on my computer. So sorry if this is posted three times…

@ericawordsmith, @anne-of-lothlorien, @wordsmith

I’m so glad that you guys got back to your discussion on chivalry, because after trolling this thread, I was going to comment on it, but then was like, “Nah… that’s too 10am August 14th.” So I didn’t. But, you’re back at it now, so I shall add my voice to the conversation.

First, I’d like to say that chivalrous guys still exist. They might be growing fewer and further between, but I can think of three distinct instances with three different guys where I have seen what I’d call modern chivalry displayed. No one saved a damsel in distress from a dragon, but they did things that either took guts or were awkward but good or whatever.

Example one – the awkward story. I had just read this article about letting boys be men, and allowing them step up to the challenge. So I was like, sure, I’ll try it out. Well, I decided to give it a shot while I was at summer camp. This guy and I were about to walk out the same door at the same time, so I sort of slowed down a bunch so he could open the door. He awkwardly paused, like, Why’d she stop?, but he did open the door. It was awkward, but he did it.

Example two – So, for better or for worse, this last spring I went to prom. For the record, it’s not an experience I’d repeat again, but whatever. The guy I went with was just a friend, and I think it’s fair to say that he’s a true gentleman. But what impressed me from the experience was that it was not just me, his date, he was a gentleman to – it was other girls, too, and in instances that would be tough. The one that sticks out to me was at the post prom party, where the school had rented those KnockerBall thingys. He was in one of them, as was another girl from his school. One of the guys from his school was like, “Hey Nathan! Five bucks if you knock over Addy!” And he didn’t. And I was so proud, b’cause I knew that I had the best man at the prom.

Example three – I’ve got a big family. One morning, while we were on vacation, we stopped at McDonalds for breakfast. We all got waters to drink, and I was given the role of drink-filler. So, I had filled up all these cups of water – like, ten of them – and was trying to figure out how I was going to carry them all to our table in one trip without a drink carrier (and without spilling them and making a fool of myself). So, one of my little siblings took a couple of the drinks. Now there were only eight left. Just as I was about to try to carry them in stacks over to the table, this guy comes up and is like, “Let me help.” It’s a complete and total stranger. So he took four and I took four and we made it to the table sans spill, and my family’s like, “Who’s that?” (in the way that families do when a nice guy you’ve never met before helps you carry waters to your table). So I was impressed by that dude – it was an inconvenience for him, were were strangers, and nobody would have judged him if he head just let me take two trips. But he didn’t.

So those are my three stories of chivalry.

@anne-of-lothlorien, your story about your book makes me think of another book I’ve seen recently – Mansfield’s Book of Manly Men. It’s a really good book, and I’d suggest it to all guys. And it’s good for girls, too, since I appreciated it and I’m a girl. But I’d especially suggest it for guys.

And now – what about the opposite? What about female characters? I get that this can be a bit of a touchy subject in today’s day and age, and I definitely don’t mean to take away from the chivalry conversation, as it is a rousing one. But what is the feminine opposite of chivalry? Is it appreciated or present? And how can we as writers portray it to be a good thing?