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@lonathecat

Okee dokee, here we go.

For the record, I REALLY like your comparison with the painter and the painting. Wonderful simile.

I noticed you started a lot of sentence with “For” at the beginning, so it sounded a bit repetitive, but not that bad. I think it can still work just as it is, but I guess that’s for you to decide. 😉

This is just a typo, I believe: “The taught them how to listen, how to act as the voice of those who had none, and how to care for other creatures.”   I think you meant: “They taught.. etc.”

And just a comma thing here: “This worried the sisters, because there would be no telling how the Humans would respond.” I think there should be no comma before the because clause, but I don’t know if there’s an exception to the no-comma-before-because-clauses rule, so if there is an exception that I’m not aware of, ignore this. 😀

“The People, startled by the sudden outburst looked to the sisters for help.”  I think you’re missing a comma.  I think it needs to be: “The People, startled by the sudden outburst, looked to the sisters for help.” So comma after outburst. 🙂

Then right here: “We have made a grave error, sister.” Death spoke.” I think you need a comma instead of a period before Death, and I don’t know whether it’d be spoke or said. I think said, but again, I don’t know, so do what you want 😛

And just another typo, I believe: “Pease, forgive us.” I think you meant: “Please, forgive us.” 

*claps emphatically* I LOVED IT!! It was so creative, and the Silver Lake touch… beautiful.  I hope I didn’t sound harsh with my critique, and know that you’re a wonderful writer, whose creativity I can only attempt to replicate!