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Hrm. *re-reads for editing* I would suggest not doing the bullet-points. Instead make a list like this: “Now you’re either going to scream and run away from me, find someone from a mental asylum and force them to take me in, call me a half-fang, or do all three and more.”

You also may want to re-word this sentence, or use different punctuation. I had to re-read it a couple times to understand it. Maybe try this?

“I say abilities in the plural because wolfwalkers, while known for their main power of being able to transform into wolves while asleep, have other things too, the most prominent–actually, I’m not gonna say: personal laws of Wolfwalkers.”

or

“I say abilities in the plural because wolfwalkers, while known for their main power of being able to transform into wolves while asleep, have other things too, the most prominent–actually, I’m not gonna say. Those are personal laws of Wolfwalkers.”

*shrugs* It’s up to you!

BTW, I really love the style you’re going with here. I’ve rarely seen a story told by the MC directly to the audience, kinda a 1st person and 2nd person mix. It’s unique, fun to read, and reminds me of The Emperor’s New Groove. XD

Possible typos & grammatical errors:

• AP capitalizes the noun Fang(s) in all his books. IDK if you wanna do that too. 🙂
• Are you capitalizing wolfwalkers or not? 😉
• The “proper” grammatical way to say this: “Me and Kalmar” would be “Kalmar and I”, for whatever reason, but it gives an excellent impression of Aaliyah’s voice, so if you want to keep it it’s totally fine. 😀
• “‘You’ Janner said” should be “‘You,’ Janner said”.
• “’Aaliyah,’ Someone said, Artham” should be “‘Aaliyah,’ someone said. Artham”.

These are not gigantic problems, just a few suggestions. As always, take them or leave them, and keep writing! 😀