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@kylie-wingfeather,

Excellent work! I once planned out a Wingfeather fan-fic, but long story short it never got written. *blinks back tears*

One thing I might suggest would be to have more information from Janner’s POV. Talk about his thoughts more. Have him judge Aaliyah (COOL name!), even if his ideas aren’t true. Some more stuff about him will help readers keep in mind that he’s the POV they are experiencing right now. When I read chapter 2, I kept discovering that I had to remind myself constantly that this was JANNER’s POV, not Aaliyah’s. 🙂

Also, there’s a couple typos. I wasn’t sure if those were accidental or not, so I won’t point them out. 😉 Excellent work!