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  • Evelyn replied to the topic Poetry Critque, pretty please? (: in the forum Poetry Discussions 7 years, 4 months ago

    @kb-writer Ah, thank you for your critique! I will work through it! 😀 😀 😀

    So you know what I saw, I eventually decided that it was a sad poem that meant that if you never love, you will never be heartbroken, and that’s what the speaker is trying to say. Basically, be like the phantoms. I had also thought at one point that you were saying something more like “you are numb to love. But how can you be like that when you’re heart is with God?” (Don’t ask me where that came from. It was some interesting reading of the text)

    And yes, that was basically the meaning… I was wondering if the “locked above” was too confusing… as I didn’t literally meant locked above, but I meant it more as just locked away and numbed from feeling anything, but wanted to rhyme and all sooo… yeah. 😛 I’ll work on that.

    Thanks for reading it! You have been very helpful and have confirmed my suspicions about about the ending! Thank you! 🙂

     

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