Activity

Arian stuff

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I ran a hand through my short hair and shuttled the twins into Sunday school. Blowing a big breath out, I sagged on the wall. My breathing came hard and I wrapped an arm around my stomach. It was churning from the last dose of chemo I had had the day before and I was still on a delicate balance. I pressed a hand on my mouth and tried to hold the vomit in. I breathed through the nausea and knocked my head back on the wall. This was not how I wanted my first Sunday back at church to be like.

Truth, Leah, Ames and Legion had all been so happy that I was okay and coming to church, but Damian had been shooting me worried looks on the drive there when I rubbed my temples. He had been attached to my side when we entered church and only agreed to split because Leah and Ames wanted him to ask the youth pastor something.

The nausea passed and I was able to lift off of the wall and head towards the youth area. My gait was slower than normal, but I didn’t stumble and my knees didn’t buckle. That was a good sign and meant I was on my way to remission.

I glimpsed the smooth expanse of my husband’s back underneath his normal plaid shirt through the large crowd of our church. I shouldered through people and tapped his shoulder lightly. Damian whirled around and smiled when he saw me.

“Bird,” he said lightly, smiling. His handsomeness struck me in a wave and I stared in awe. Damian’s face had been wrinkled in worry for so many weeks, I was happy to see his face clear.

I smiled, “What?”

He wrapped me up in his arms and lifted me up a few feet off the ground. He twirled me around and tickled my neck with his scruff, “I love you so much,” he whispered. I pulled back from him, smiling.

“Why’d you do this all of a sudden?” I laughed as he set me down. Damian leaned his forehead against mine.

“Because I am so sure that you are going to get through this,” he said, smiling at me, “I got some great advice from the kid’s youth pastor. Did you know his wife had the same cancer you have? He reminded me I had to support you and not mope around. God will help us through this.”

I smiled at Damian, all teeth showing, then kissed him so hard that my teeth hurt, “You are the best husband ever, you know that?”

“And you’re the best wife,” he said quietly, “but we’re in the hallway of a church right now, can we get on with our day?”

I smiled against his lips and we started towards the sanctuary.

 

A few days later was my next trip to the doctor’s, and Damian came with me. I had a brief physical checkup and was back sitting after an x-ray when a doctor came in with a grave expression. He looked up from his clipboard with his lips in a grim line.

“Mrs. Wolf,” he said quietly, “I’m sorry to say that your cancer has relapsed.”

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i am so, so sorry