How to Avoid Unnecessarily Offending Readers

January 4, 2021

When writers work hard and pursue publication, at some point their words will be on a shelf or webpage for the public to consume. But the downside of our internet age is that readers can instantaneously share negative opinions with thousands of viewers. We’ve all encountered posts about an author who got “cancelled” because of something their book included or excluded, and that can fill us with anxiety about how our own stories will be received.


Maybe you’re wrestling with this fear right now. Can (and should) you remove potential triggers from your manuscript so that you don’t attract backlash? Or are most critics too touchy and need to lighten up? The answer, as with most sticky issues, lies somewhere in the middle. You can’t completely shield yourself from “haters,” but you should make a conscious effort to care about others’ feelings. Here are a few tips to help you achieve that balance.


1. Write Your Story without Reservation

Before you stress about the outcome, you first have to write the story. If you’re anything like me, you can sense readers watching you during the actual writing process—even though you’re alone with your laptop. You attempt to predict what their reactions will be if you insert character X or scenario Y, growing more and more worried as the moments pass.


Don’t let your focus drift outward during the first draft (unless you enjoy driving yourself crazy).


Turning a raw idea into chapters, paragraphs, and sentences is an incredibly personal experience. Outside influences will throttle your ability to develop a basic structure for your story. When you write with abandon instead, you allow yourself to be truly creative. Often, the heart of your story—the most honest scenes—will only appear in an environment of freedom.


Remember, nobody has seen your story yet. They can’t judge you or get hurt. Take a deep breath and keep typing.


2. Be Mindful Toward Others

The Christian writing community rarely discusses what to do when readers believe that a story is politically incorrect or falsifying information about a cause that matters to them. If offended readers would move on to material they agree with, that’d make this conversation unnecessary, right? No, because the widely varied experiences of others shouldn’t be treated flippantly.


As Christians, we should be characterized by compassion. In writing, that translates to caution. Sensitivity is not part of a “progressive agenda”—it’s part of loving and respecting others, as the second greatest commandment explicitly instructs us to do. Are we “loving our neighbor” when we represent a group of people with simplistic tropes? What about when those people request more diversity, and we continue to ignore them because we think our portrayal is adequate? No, we’re not.


With that in mind, ask hard questions to assess whether aspects of your story are problematic. Are you spreading any unconscious stereotypes about a group of people? Does your premise rely on a clichéd and skewed plot device? These mistakes can creep in because we’re unaware of them, or because the media we grew up with has influenced us. For example, how many times have you read or watched a story where the only African-American character was the protagonist’s peppy best friend? A character with mental illness became the villain? Or an offhand joke about someone’s weight, ethnicity, or religion was deemed acceptable?


Everyone has inherent worth, which means they deserve complex and accurate depictions of their individual joys and struggles. The quickest way to enhance a story is to cultivate a genuine interest in people who are different from you. Understanding who they are and why will help you better represent them. You don’t have to agree with your characters’ worldviews or actions to flesh them out—after all, no one condones murder, but it’s still a common plot device (even for heroes).


If you’re addressing a topic that you’re personally unfamiliar with and/or want to delve into controversial themes, consider running your piece by a “sensitivity reader.” These people are members of the communities you’re writing about and can warn you if you might be causing harm. Look for them in Facebook writing groups, writing forums, or through the #sensitivityreader tag on Instagram and Twitter. You can also enlist friends and family members—essentially, anyone who has experienced the situation you’re trying to describe is a valid candidate. No training necessary.


Of course, you need to analyze less sensitive components during this stage as well, such as the themes you hope to communicate. How will your audience respond? Are your intentions clear? Know your readers so you can both subvert and play to their expectations. This is where good writing becomes great writing—you put yourself in the reader’s mind and build new concepts from the ideas you find there.


3. Move Forward with Courage and Humility

After your story has been published, you’ll have to accept whatever happens. You can make addendums (as J. K. Rowling is now infamous for), but that’s usually unwise. That’s why publishing is such a sobering decision—once your story is accessible to anyone, you can’t retract it. So your best recourse is to relax.


I know. That’s easier said than done, but it is possible.


Remember that you’re not perfect, nor will you ever be. And neither is any other author. Be open to constructive criticism. If you receive a stream of negative reviews, readers may have a point! Or they might be angry for personal reasons. Either way, you’re not a horrible writer who should never pick up a pen again just because someone disagrees with your choices. You can always alter your course next time if you feel like you went in the wrong direction.


Take heart in the fact that you can make unusual decisions and still succeed! Some authors have completely distanced themselves from their fan bases without losing popularity. Anne Rice, once famous for her Vampire Chronicles novels, returned to her Catholic faith for several years and wrote Christian fiction during that time. Back in the early 2000s, she was also a proponent of fan fiction as an illegal act. Both of these choices were controversial, but she’s still sold almost 100 million copies of her novels. That could be you too!


Okay, I’m kidding. But eventually you just need to press the send button and get it over with. You’ll be okay, I promise.


Give Yourself Grace

The truth is that you’ll never please everybody. The background of each individual will influence their interpretation of your story. Themes that you never meant to convey may leap out at them, and characters that are meaningful to you may not resonate with them at all. Plus, people are fickle. Today something excites us; tomorrow it’s boring. Nothing lasts forever, not even a scandal.


So write what you’re passionate about and do it well. Care about people and their experiences. You’ll never know everything, but you can do your best to learn. If you’re kind, open, honest, and true to yourself and your beliefs, the rest will fall into place.


  1. Chelsea R.H.

    I loved this article and I think it was perfectly balanced between both sides. For me, another important fact is how you act if you are called out for something you’ve created causing harm. So many celebrities/authors/creators react defensively (for example see the recent blowups over Rowling and the musician Sia) and aggressively when they’re called out and I honestly think that’s what makes people really angry–creators refusing to acknowledge that they have power and that they have accidentally (usually) used it to hurt already hurting people. At the same time, creators that react with humility and kindness and a willingness to learn and change are given a lot more grace (Anne Hathaway was recently called out over a potentially offensive portrayal she made in her latest movie and she apologised sincerely and people have realised that she made a mistake and is doing her best to make up for that). So basically, I think its ridiculous to hold creators to a standard of perfection when we’re humans and can never be perfect, but humility and love goes a long way if we are called out.
    Once again, lovely article and I really enjoyed reading it.

  2. Brian Stansell

    Amen, Quinlyn!
    Your article nails it on so many levels!

    I am reminded of the words of Jesus:
    19 And the judgment is based on this fact: God’s light came into the world, but people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil. 20 All who do evil hate the light and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed. 21 But those who do what is right come to the light so others can see that they are doing what God wants.” [John 3:19-21 NLT]
    13 Everyone will hate you because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. [Mark 13:13 NIV]
    17 Everyone will hate you because of me. [Luke 21:17 NIV]

    The truth is that we cannot carry the opinions of “the world” on our shoulders or let their sensitivity dim the gospel or the truths that must be spoken in tough love.

    Other scriptures also affirm that Christ is a “rock of offense” to those who hate “light-bearers”:
    33 As it is written: “Behold, I lay in Zion a stumbling stone and rock of offense, And whoever believes on Him will not be put to shame.” [Romans 9:33 NKJV]
    8 and “A stone of stumbling And a rock of offense.” They stumble, being disobedient to the word, to which they also were appointed. [1 Peter 2:8 NKJV]

    Simply bearing the name of Jesus will cause offense, but we should never shy away from it.

    If we can find a way to “be all things to all people” without compromising our stand or undermining the message, we should do so. (1 Cor. 9:22)

    I feel that walking this narrow corridor is impossible for us to do alone, and so I think of it as Peter’s walk on the water. With the storms of “popularized” opinions around us, we cannot “walk water” if we are not shutting out the storm and focusing on The One who called us out of the boat.

    Jesus has the capacity to do in us what is impossible, without compromise. It is a walk by faith, the same as anything else. Focus on pursuing where Jesus stands upon the tumultuous sea of public opinion and walk toward Him in intimate fellowship.

    We only have Him to please by our focus and our obedience to step one foot in front of the other, leaving the safety of the obscurity of “The boat” that everyone else takes shelter in. Writing for His glory is loving Him through those gifts He invested in us.

    It is that “cross principle”: If we align our verticle relationship to Him, He loves others through us in the horizontal cross direction.

    And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself.” [John 12:32 NIV]

    We can never love our fellow man the way He does. So we let Him–Love them–through us.

    Ultimately, if we are yielding our gifts for His glory, we will care little about who all comes to us as fans, but instead, care most about who all comes to Him for the true transformative Hope & Light He offers them.

    Thank you again for sharing this article.

    Those who God brings to the place where they need the Light, He will allow us to shine to.

  3. Abriana

    Thanks for this article. It’s something I needed to read before I started writing. As weird as it sounds, there’s always one thing I’m scared people will misinterpret with my stories and utterly hate them for…It’s the fact that I portray physical affection (hugs, kisses, cuddles, etc.) between totally platonic friends.
    I worry those who understand it’s not suppose to be romantic or sexual will still find it taboo, improper, and gross, yet I also worry that Christians will automatically assume I’m trying to portray homosexuality positively under the guise of “friendship” (which I am NOT attempting to do. I myself have friends, male and female, who I show varying degrees of non-sexual physical affection with. Never platonically cuddled with a guy friend, but have with girl friends–it’s nothing but friendship between us all)


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