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@evelyn @emma-star @j-a-penrose @caleb-e-king @daeus-lamb

Can someone help critique this and tell me what’s so horrible about it,  and maybe how i can make it better?  Cuz a certain group said its not any good (to feely/dirmatic, not good writing, ect) that i shouldn’t have even entered it into the contest cuz it would be a waist of money.. but theyre not writers so they didn’t tell me ways i can fix it.  So all i know is a story i thought was fine, maybe good is actually horrible and there’s no way to fix it. 🙁 help please!

~Kat