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@warrenluther04

to answer your questions:

-it is intriguing.  I like how you drop the reader right into the action.  it makes me curious for what went on before and what is going to happen.

-the characters are mysterious however I was getting confused to who was doing the talking and the action; at some points your wording is vague.

-overall I think that the flow is good and fast-paced.  because it’s so fast paced I’d break up some of your larger paragraphs into smaller ones in order to make it read fast to match it’s pace.

for example:

“Didn’t your parents teach you that it isn’t right to betray your friends and join the very evil they were fighting to defeat?” Marie countered.

The man screamed and threw his hands upward, sending arcs of pale yellow energy rippling out toward the couple, tearing up the asphalt in its wake. The bands of energy slammed against Marie’s mental barrier and dispersed, but the crumbling rock piled up against the telepathic force field, creating a tall barrier that blocked Marie and Charles’ vision.

[I’d break up these two sentences into shorter ones.  they tend towards being drawn out and run-on.  also the shorter sentences will read quicker and raise the reader’s apprehension.]

Through the earthen barrier, they could hear the man comment: “We had hoped that you would have joined us too, but you aren’t his primary target. Not anymore.”

A rumbling sound filled the air, and the man and woman soared up overhead, and a single word drifted down to their ears: a parting gift from the woman.
Lucie….

[also for the last sentence I’d break it into two in order to pack more of a punch.]

other things:

-you have several character’s dialog in the same paragraph.  they should each have a separate paragraph because 1). it confuses the reader and 2). it’s the proper form.

-your sentences are rather long and tend towards run-on sentences.  there’s nothing wrong with long sentences however if all your sentences are long it can bog the reader down and sound clunky.  I suggest interspersing them with short and snappy sentences that might recapture the reader’s attention.  🙂

parting thoughts: I think that overall you have good a solid prologue and that with some cosmetic and structural fixes will be a great one!

-Lydia