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Alessio paused in the middle of throwing the “parchment flowers” at Sherlock to stare at the food, mesmerized. He hadn’t expected much. He’d barely expected maybe more than a crust of bread – that would’ve been more than he was used to. So when plates and plates of eggs, bacon, biscuits and foods he didn’t even recognize he stared at it, disbelievingly. It was a trap it was a trap it had to be a trap maybe it was drugged?

Endlessly Angry kicked him under the table, hard. Alessio shot him a glare and kicked him back.

By then the food was set on the table and Alessio forgot all his animosity, snatching a plate heaped with…well he didn’t really know what most of the food was but he didn’t really care either, it looked delicious. Automatically, he shielded his claimed portion with his arm while he ate. He also crammed any biscuit or easily savaged food in his pockets – just in case.

Alessio glanced up to find Endlessly Angry glowering disdainfully at his tablemanners. Alessio squared his jaw obstinately and proceeded to eat the rest of his eggs with his hands. So Endlessly Angry kicked him under the table again.

So Alessio took a deep breath, smiled innocently and resumed barraging Endlessly Angry with fluttery flowers. It half occurred to him to try to think what Nithel would think of this. He’d tell me to be nice to this jerk…

He tossed another parchment flower at him.

That’s when Endlessly Angry snapped and threw a plate at him. Alessio reflexively jerked back and caught the plate inches away from his face. But well, he’d never sat in an actual chair before so the action tilted the chair back and knocked him into a contorted position twisted sideways with the handcuffs – earning Alessio a nice bruise on the back of his head.

Ow.

“YOU! I warned you there would be consequences if so much as a piece of glass was chipped!” Arsene snarled, leaping on top of the table. Alessio flinched before realizing Arsene was addressing Endlessly Angry, not him.

Almost as suddenly Arsene/Saga halted and then jumped off the table.

Dazed, Alessio propped himself upright, crosslegged on the floor and rubbed his head. The floor is nice, the floor loves me. He firmly decided against climbing that stupid chair again.

With a squeaking, rolling noise Saga returned wheeling in trays of…pies?

“Long ago, my father told me that in situations like this, a man was obligated to duel to prove his honor.” What…? “Today, everyone has been publicly shamed, thanks to certain people. I won’t mention who.”

Wait…no. It’s a bad idea.

“But now, the day has come. Sherlock, I challenge you to a duel.” He’s joking…right? Saga picked up a pie. On the bright side Alessio finally learned Endlessly Angry’s name.

“I hope you like almonds.” What are almonds?

“I don’t.” Sherlock snapped

“Well, that’s too bad.” Saga said hurling a pie at Sherlock’s face. Alessio stared at the pie he’d just wasted…wastefully. Although he did feel avenged now, but…that was food, food was hard to come by, and there was enough on this table to feed him for months-! Why don’t you throw knifes at each other it’ll be far less wasteful!?!

“A food fight? For real, Arsene? You can’t expect me to…!” His words were interrupted with a pie square in the face. Alessio’s eyes widened, suddenly he ducked his head, trying hard to stifle a grin – slightly panicking because he knew he’d get in trouble for laughing!!

In an instant, Sherlock hurled a pie at him. Alessio dodged at it hit…it hit Sir Scary. A laugh escaped before he could stop himself, he smothered more laughter unsuccessfully, staring in horror at his would-be assassin. Who slammed the table and then through a plate of scrambled eggs at Sherlock so hard he fell to the ground.

Alessio took this opportunity to snatch some more breakfast and stuff it in his pockets. The only trouble was…he was now out of pockets.

Alessio stared at Sir Scary’s pockets knowing what a bad idea that was and knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt he was going to do it anyway.

“How dare you hit a lady!” – Oh devils, Leana, was Leana ok?! – “Don’t worry ma’am, I’ll avenge you!”

Alessio hurled a pie plate at Sherlock like it was a knife or a frisbee. He also slipped a half of a biscuit in Sir Scary’s pocket. Sir Scary glared at him through the mask before he got his hand out. Alessio did the only dumb thing he could think of and hit Sir Scary with a pie. In hindsight, not the best idea seeing as they were handcuffed together and he had no escape contingency.

Luckily for Alessio, unluckily for Sir Scary, another pie hit him. So Alessio ducked out of the way (mostly) while Sir Scary was preoccupied. Leana was coated in some frosting from Sherlock.

“I am so sorry, are you ok!?” He stammered. And got hit with another pie in the side of his face. It tasted yummy. A bit of a dumb smirk crept on his face, as he grabbed another pie and spun in the direction of the attack.