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@r-j-karas I think it looks great! I really like it. I love the way you tied it together with Ecclesiastes. And guys, I love the fact that it’s just a given that fish have short term memory loss XD

I gave you a few suggestions that might make it read more smoothly. I was mainly looking for little grammatical clarifications, and trying to let expressions echo without overusing them. Feel free to take them or leave them. I’m not super experienced– do whatever you think:)

I’m headed out of town and won’t be around much until Thursday, but I’ll check periodically to see the progress. Have fun with it, everyone! Cheers!