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@emma-starr I think it’s lovely.   I think you have some great images in there, but you could, as @sir-leeds said, “embellish” it a bit.  For example, try not to use trite expressions.  We know that winter is grey and cold, now let us see it in a new way.  So instead of saying the tea is cold, you could say it has “lost its warmth, lost its soul”.   Maybe that’s a little weird, but you get the idea. xD  Use vivid verbs and nouns instead of is/was +adjective combinations.  Also, cartoonish does seem a little out of place… maybe “playful caricature”?

Overall, I really like it.  You paint clear pictures that I can see in my mind, now just try to enhance those pictures.  I hope this helps!