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@the-fledgling-artist Thank you! *bows* 😉

Do I feel pressured at all to get back into my previous headspace? Not really actually. Which is the surprising part. There have been countless times over the past eight-ish years of writing where I give up in a huff and throw my story across the room and vow never to touch it again… always breaking that after a week and a half or so when I realize, I might hate writing here and there but I hate not writing even more. And cooling off and realizing I can get better if I stick to it and work out problems. But this time it was a more subtle quiet thing and as it stands, the story I have is something different than any other story I’ve written. I have written half a draft, threw that out the window and completely reworked it and finish a complete draft and now I have this feeling that its the story I wouldn’t mind spending years working on, writing, rewriting, rethinking, trashing, brainstorming, refashioning, etc. I’m at the point where I love the story and the characters enough that I don’t give up on them, but I want them to be their best and the book to be paced and woven perfectly. I could see myself continually adding and chipping away and rewriting for the next five years depending on if I go to college. Then just delay those five years until after I graduate and get a 9 to 5 job. Who knows if it would ever get anywhere, but that’s where it’s different than before. I don’t mind much anymore. I have been rewarded so richly from this past year and a half that I have been forming this story, but at this point I’m no longer pretending like I’m not – but truly and secretly on the side – researching and worrying about marketing or publishing or anything of that type. It’s very strange but lovely I think. I’ve always (and when I say always I mean it… like since I was about five) automatically “known” I was going to be an author. I’m not sure where it started, in fact I don’t remember a time I didn’t “know” that. And that has always been the case ever since then until now. A year ago I began questioning that to the very core like I had never before done, and the result is that I realized I’m not sure what I want to be/do anymore. It had been hard having my mind set on writing for a living my entire life because in the growing stage (which hasn’t ended, but I mean the huge growing stage where I was learning to read and write and then began writing little stories) I would keep going back and realizing how bad my stories where, it went to my heart. Ouch. I’m a writer. That’s why I’m here. I’m here for nothing else. My entire life. And now I’m a failure.

That would happen again and again and I would get so depressed and mad and throw the story across the room or rip it or lock it away. But this time it’s different.

I’m definitely out of practice (yes writing is a practice) and a couple weeks ago when I actually had the time to write and the longing, when I sat down I found my mind had fallen back into it’s lazy ways and my fingers were (figuratively and somewhat literally) out of gear and clumsy.  I got nothing and I knew I didn’t have the time to begin working back up to where I could write two to three thousand words every morning before school.

Anyways. All that to say, I don’t feel any pressure for returning. Now I just love it and I don’t think I could ever truly stop.

Yeah. Well. I feel like that was a little “writer testimony” haha 😆

Eyyy. I loved that project! 😀 I really hope it’s going well. It looks amazing and every once and a while I get on Instagram and stalk your art profiles to try and find updates.  I bet it’s been amazing and that you have been learning a lot through that! I don’t think I could manage a group project unless it was with the right people. (Been there, tried that. 😛 )

As to your second, that sounds so exciting! I don’t know if you picked up on this, but for the past year or so I’ve developed this love of experimenting with styles and stories and plots and trying to think of new ways to tell them. So I would definitely suggest trying something new and trying a new medium of story.  😉