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@adnyole

I have a few thoughts!

Umm…so HUGE ramble incoming XD

So, I’m actually in a (kind of?) similar boat here – A few months ago, I realized that the love interest of my story, Kit, is bisexual – AND TO BE CLEAR I’m also trying to pursue this carefully, and from a Biblical perspective (that homosexuality is a sin.)  Like you, I’ve prayed about this, and also sought guidance and advice from other Christian writers (Cathy actually helped me a lot here!)

Here’s a few things that really helped me, and might help you as well!

1. Establish the character’s view of the situation – Kit is very determined to not act on this temptation, and that honestly REALLY cut a lot of stickiness out of the situation.  It’s a lot easier to write about something hard when the character isn’t running headfirst into a lie/sin

2. Establish the other characters’ views of the situation – One issue that I explored with Kit was the lack of real support he had – his close friend Cecil seemed sympathetic at first and very eager to support him and his strong moral code, but Kit later realized that Cecil really just wanted to help him “hide it” because he was ashamed of him (Cecil would go on to accidentally betray his trust in a moment of weakness, which eventually got Kit ostracized.)  One of the antagonists, Sebastian, was initially very friendly and supportive towards Kit in the aftermath, but later mocked him when he found out that Kit was opposed to even considering acting on it (Sebastian is also interesting to me because he’s a hedonist with no morals, but because he lacks any sort of attraction or interest in relationships he’s not promiscuous at all.  I think he thinks Kit is stupid more than anything.)  On the other hand, he’s also got a genuine, solid support system in his brothers and in his love interest, Val (the MC)

Also @this-is-not-an-alien don’t worry I’ve got some really amazing ace characters and Sebastian is NOT representative of them all XD

3. Understand that you’ll ruffle some feathers – this has been a really hard pill for me to swallow tbh, because I’m very sensitive to conflict.  Obviously, this kind of story won’t go over well in the current cultural climate we’re in, where homosexuality is celebrated as something to be proud of.  On the other hand, a lot of Christians might feel very uncomfortable reading a story like this.  Obviously, convictions are important and I respect that!  And I think this applies to your story too – in this cultural climate, people would wonder why Lydia wouldn’t turn to abortion.  I think it’s also just a topic that could be disturbing to a lot of people, and honestly as long as you give proper build up and warnings…it’s not really something you can control.  I don’t think we should shy away from tough topics just because they could be disturbing to people, but we should try to handle them with grace and dignity!

I think one of the things that I was mildly concerned about is that Kit’s fashion sense and personality are…well…kind of stereotypically queer tbh – he’s flamboyant, very stylish, and spends the majority of the story running around with bubblegum pink hair.  It’s not something I included intentionally – he was always like this, even before I knew about this aspect of his character.  However, I know that this will be very off putting and uncomfortable for some Christians, because in our culture, we associate this kind of personality with queer guys, and therefore with a person in a sinful lifestyle.

But when you think about it, is there anything morally wrong with being dramatic and stylish?  Is there anything inherently sinful about a man having pink hair?  Obviously, this depends on the cultural context, but in this culture, I wouldn’t say it’d be viewed as sinful (maybe a bit odd and ugly XD)

Also, it’s not like Kit is effeminate in any way – in fact, he’s got one of the most masculine roles/behavior in the whole cast of characters.  Which honestly opened up a lot of room for discussion and exploration within the story – is Kit any less of a man because he struggles this way?  Would his personality and fashion sense be an issue if he didn’t have this struggle?

Which I think is applicable to your story as well.  I think when you include something touchy, you can’t just include it and leave.  It has to be impactful and “present” in the story to be worth including, and for me that looks like exploring the questions and topics related to it.  Is Lydia ever tempted to want to abort her baby?  Does she wish she wasn’t pregnant?  Does she maybe resent her husband for not being able to protect her?  Does she fear she won’t be able to provide the baby with the love and affection they deserve?  Is she attached to the baby, but maybe fears that her husband will never be?  How long does it take for her to become attached to her baby?  Does she resent the baby?  Does she feel guilt over what happened?  Some of these are tough questions, and honestly I completely understand if you don’t want to explore them (I wouldn’t want to explore them myself tbh), and if you do explore them you have to be sensitive and try to avoid making it disturbing.  However, I do think that exploring hard questions makes it feel much more real, and it also makes the morally right decisions the character makes feel much more impactful and weighty (as well as realistic.)

As for Kit, of course I had to keep his personality and style!  There’s nothing morally wrong with it, it’s not inherently linked to his struggle in any way (I actually think it’s related to his ADHD tbh – sensory seeking and all that XD), and he’d just be sad and boring and bland without it.  I needed that part of him to inject that much needed levity and joy into a frankly dark and dismal setting.

Which brings me to my next two points:

4. I think that it’s so, so important to include humor in dark stories!  My story, Spire, is honestly very bleak at times, which has lent a rather dark and dry humor to my writing.  Now, this likely varies depending on taste and convictions, and I do believe there are some hard lines that shouldn’t be crossed – I don’t ever make jokes about people dying, for example.  However, I’ve been told that this element of my writing makes it easier to stomach some of the darker parts, which seems counterintuitive but it really does work!

Also, just plain old funny humor.  For all of the dark or emotionally trying moments in Spire, there’s tons of banter between Kit and his brothers, and plenty of good old fashioned romantic tension and between him and Val!

5. Don’t make a spectacle of the situation – I don’t think anyone does this deliberately, but it’s so easy to let it creep in.  So, for Kit, I don’t want to add too much angst surrounding this struggle, and I don’t want to pry too deeply into how this looks for him – it’s a deeply personal issue and he deserves privacy and respect, and I don’t want to disturb any readers.  So, the readers see how Kit deals with the struggle, but the struggle itself is kind of veiled, if that makes sense.  You’ve already mentioned that you don’t want to be graphic or too detailed, and I think that’s a very wise decision.

I’ve also avoided turning Kit into a stereotype, which I mentioned before.  I think that these more “stereotypical” aspects of his character are only problematic if you think that they’re inherently linked to his struggle – meaning that it defines him and his personality (which it doesn’t.)  I think this is important for Lydia’s arc too.  This trauma affects her deeply, but it doesn’t define her!

I actually think the main issue here would be the pregnancy itself tbh.  I think the main issue that I see is that a lot of the good that comes out of the pregnancy seems to benefit the people around her, but not herself.  This may sound selfish, but I think that it’s important that the character who deals with the trauma personally experience the good that comes out of it.

So, Kit was ostracized because of this struggle, but in the process lost a very toxic and hypocritical social circle, and let go of a lot of damaging behaviors that he’d picked up to try to hide the fact that he’s struggling (he flirted incessantly with girls to convince people he was straight…as well as for social stimulation because he’s horrible like that.)

Which is also interesting because part of this was related to his ADHD too – his style change is actually kind of symbolism for him dropping the “mask” he’d adopted to blend into this social circle, and now that he’s not being held to their standard, he’s free to enjoy the creative mind he’d been suppressing (neurodivergency is actually a pretty big aspect of this story – Val is one of many autistic characters in the story, and it’s going to take a while for her to let go of her mask)

So although this had a negative impact at first, it’s satisfying because he grew from it, and he’s stronger and a healthier person as a result (of course, this doesn’t negate the very real trauma he experienced.)  If it’d only impacted other people, I think it would’ve been incredibly unsatisfying.

I also think that if I were you, I’d actually avoid giving Lydia a traumatic birth.  Again, absolutely pray about this!  But again, this is a very personal trauma, and I just feel like the traumatic birth could really start to feel like a bit too much – especially because it only serves to help the others in the party, but not so much herself.

I also think it’d really help to give her some female companions – maybe even women who’ve experienced this same trauma!  I think that would make her birth way less traumatic because she would have women to help her and give her privacy, since right now the whole party is male and I think that would just add to the trauma tbh.  I also think it could be very healing and therapeutic for her to talk and confide with them 🙂

These are just my thoughts!  I’m interested to hear what you have to say!