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@rose-colored-fancy

I read Faye – it is wonderful. I love the character introductions; all have their quirks yet they interact nicely.

1. Intriging:

With that, Juni finally sat. Her moment of glory was over.

I loved that her moment was to deliver ‘big news’ as opposed to the news itself.

2. Mood:

[[A warm brown with sparks of colour that nestled in snug & comfortable.]]

3. Characters I’d like to know more about:

All of them? Mostly Faye (what is her role in the family), the twins (they seem an interesting pair, I love the individuality of them so far – I also want to see how close they are (or aren’t)), and Juni (she’s just a ball of fun).

4. Empathy towards:

Faye? I get the feeling she is an older sibling… I am eldest of 5, so yeah, I can relate to bunch of kids coming in all wanting to steal the spotlight.

5. What I’d like more developed:

I quite liked it. But am unsure how Faye relates to all the family members.

6. Dialogue:

I have struggled with multiple characters being introduced at once, and I think you have done wonderfully.

8. Want to read more scenes?

Yes! Loved the characters (as said above), but also the hints of an isolated environment that may not stay that way ??

9. Not belong:

I wasn’t sure who Isa was- I thought she might be Raisa’s nickname at first.

10. Favourite:

Besides, you fixed it last time.

Sage interjected, purely for the sake of aggravating Juni.

Both interactions were very realistic in a family setting, lol. Nostalgia feels to when I was living with my siblings & parents.

11. Any changes:

I want to know where Faye fits in the family (but that may be in other scenes, which probs works fine~)

Was Isa already in the house with Faye?

12. Wouldn’t have noticed if only read it and not listened:

Hearing it is nice, being able to pick up on the emphasis of words better.

 

Super job 🙂 It’s a nice scene and it was lovely to hear it too!