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@katthewriter There’s nothing wrong with being sad about someone just up and leaving, and there’s nothing wrong with reaching out to a person or your guild (though I guess those aren’t so much a thing now) about something you’re struggling with. That’s kind of the whole point of community. The thing you probably should stop is just bringing it up in random threads. That is, if it really isn’t something you think is a big deal. If you’re truly struggling with dealing with it, please do get in touch with someone whose job it is to help people struggling.

And no. My friend’s life crumbled in a way I have no right to discuss in public. I’ve seen her a few times since then, but she didn’t recognize me.

As for the stuff with life? I think I know to some extent where you’re coming from. I wasn’t where a person should be at 18 either. I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 20. I didn’t move out of my parents’ house until I was 23. I used to make my mom cry and my dad rage because I wasn’t the kind of son they wanted and felt like they deserved. Even today I work a terrible factory job and reject filial duty in self-imposed solitude while my friends are married homeowners with professional careers. Even if I don’t know it in the same way you do, I know what it’s like to feel you’re not in the place you’re “supposed” to be.

Regarding humility, I don’t think you are humble. Humility is honest. It doesn’t feel self-pity for failing to be as good as some arbitrary standard. A humble person looks at where they stand and doesn’t overestimate or underestimate theirself. If you want to grow as a writer, you can’t attach your sense of self-worth to your work.

And yes. I distinctly remember someone claiming you made some mistake regarding the horse aspect of your story. Rather than ask what they felt the issue was, hoping to at least get another perspective, even if it was wrong, you shut them down completely and claimed you did indeed know what you were talking about. You absolutely cannot do that if you want to grow and improve, no matter how right you know you are. Even wrong opinions are worth hearing if they give you a better idea what a potential reader might think.

No, I don’t think I can help you. If you don’t think you can grow, there’s no point in trying, because you’ll never let yourself. If you can find the strength to align yourself better with true humility, if God will give you that strength, please hit me up again and I’ll be overjoyed to help how I can.