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@mckinley

Hey! Looks like you’ve already gotten some really great advice on this and I’m not a guy, but just thought I’d throw this in here in case.

I totally agree with everyone that singing and writing poetry isn’t girly. In fact I think it’s super manly, ’cause those are very passionate, deep, driven pursuits. (Not that girls are not passionate, deep, or driven either. But it’s a different flavor than when guys do it, and it’s a flavor that should not be lost).

Like others mentioned, I think you’re going to want to work on his personality, not his pursuits. However, sometimes I know fixing those personality elements can be hard. I think the difference between guy and girl personalities is almost intangible. We all know exactly what those differences are, but when we try to put names to them, it doesn’t work somehow. For instance, in the paragraph above, I started off by saying poetry was manly because it required manly traits, like passion, depth and drive. But then, after I started thinking about it more, I realized, no. Those are feminine traits too. But they feel different on a girl than a guy. What is that difference?

This is going to sound strange, but I wonder if the difference is actually the visual component of our imaginations. The things we see when we look at our characters from the outside and kind of “sense” radiating from inside of them. It’s things like body language and stance and the tones of their voice and the shape of their eyes. When you look at your character in your mind’s eye and watch them do things, you’ll be able to subconsciously detect when they are starting to feel like the wrong gender because their essence starts to shift somehow. Again, it’s not really something you can put your finger on. It’s just something we all /know/. I hope this makes any sense!

As far as practically applying this, if you haven’t already, try visualizing your character in your mind, from the outside, and feeling their essence. Then try visualizing the character again, but this time, do a version of them as the opposite gender. Does their essence change if you do that? Does it feel like, “Wait. This is a new character, new story.” I propose that if it does, that’s good. A person’s gender is a massive part of who they are and you want it to feel like they would be a different person if you changed that. If you don’t really feel a change–if it in fact it feels like the new gender actually fits your character better–then that may mean that you are subconsciously letting your own gender morph your character and you need to start rethinking them.

So, that’s just a theory and I hope it works. XD I really hope your story goes well! I had this same problem with my first novel and it was miserable, but it is not insurmountable. 😉