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Okay, so I read over the prologue and first two chapters again, and here’s some thoughts I hope will help…

1. I’m actually not sure about this one. Are you concerned that the characters are coming across clearly or that they need to be described more?
2. The description of Miss Lucorrel’s garden has a lot of details but also feels hurried, which makes this section read more like a list of items and therefore seem wordy. There’s also some repeated information (such as the name of the town being repeated at the end of the Prologue and beginning of Chapter 1) as well as some information that isn’t pertinent to the story at the moment (such as Sir Jaden’s introduction) that make some of the passages feel wordy.
3. In Chapter 1, Chloe slams the door in Nicholas’s face, yet he still addresses Allison as if he’s face-to-face with her; is he talking through the door, and if he is, how would Allison or Chloe know whether he’s smirking or not?  Also, when Allison gives Chloe the invitation in Chapter 2, Chloe says about Eric, “Oh, him? He’s my friend.” This sounds like an explanation to Allison about who Eric is, yet it also seems like Allison and Dominic already know who Eric is, so why would Chloe say this? Also, later on when Chloe meets Eric, he points to a wooden building that “they” are building yet it appears that only Eric is working on it. Are Chloe and Eric building it together, or are there other workers that aren’t mentioned?

I hope that makes sense; if not, I’ll be happy to elaborate on any of the points if you’d like. 🙂