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@myclipboardismyviolin Welcome to Story Embers! I’m sure you recognize me. (I would say something, like, heart-warming after reading your whole intro but my brain is porridge right now but I just wanted to let you know that I’m touched. . . annnnd yah. Sorry)

Thank you, Sir Dekreel. (Or should I say Miss Dekreel? I think Dekreel is a he, right?)

If there are any spirits behind this, they are long gone. I’m actually in a good mood these days, thanks to God’s power and love of me and others.

While demons can be an influence in our lives and the things that happen to us, I maintain that they can’t live in us. We have the Holy Spirit in us as believers and that is more powerful than any demon. In my case, my depression appears to have been caused by my own sin nature under the influence of the sin natures of others, which means that I was able to apply Scripture to my life to remove it. However, I also maintain that this can be a slow process of fighting one spiritual battle after another, so I don’t blame other people for their depression either – in fact I had people doing that when I took steps to end the abuse and go back to writing school.

The alternative is living in fear of demons and angelic beings, and God has not given us a spirit of fear. Also, depression (if not medically caused) is often because of feelings of worthlessness and that your life is meaningless and doomed to failure. Your sin nature is actually meaningless, worthless, and doomed to failure, but you are not your sin nature anymore- you have been saved by grace through faith. You have potential to accomplish things for God’s glory and honor, and you have intrinsic value as a human being, even if you never do anything else for your entire life. See Psalm 139. Also: look to the cross – God died for you. There is something worth saving.

I read your intro post about the illnesses and the depression, so this isn’t intended as a heavy-handed criticism. I want to encourage you to keep going, because while physical concerns might preclude you from some things, they might also open doors. My suffering with my father helped some transgender people to relate to me which allowed me to present the Gospel to them, for example. Again, getting out of depression can be a long process, so I don’t expect this to happen overnight, but I would really discourage blaming demons for your trials. That’s actually probably going to contribute to more feelings of helplessness and if your depression is caused by the sin nature like mine, you’ll be stuck in it longer.

I appreciate the thought, however, and I will be praying for you.