Activity

@taylorclogston, WOW thank you so much! this is exactly the kind of critiques I need. I could see and tell that there are things that need to be fixed, but it’s hard for me to see them. I have not really had someone, other than myself as a writer, edit it. How coincidental is it that you work in a factory. On that note, how did I do with the whole factory stuff? And if I may ask, what is a typical factory day/ inspection day for you? I know one of my biggest flaws is my tendency to generalize and lead the story rather than show it. What are your thoughts on the characters? Were they relatable or at least somewhat believable?

With Chapters, should I shorten the number but make the chapters themselves longer?

Again thank you for your input.