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@consciousdreamer

1. The Characteristic Moment

Oooh, I like this idea. It allows for the reader to see a bit of an interesting way of thinking, kinda like Szeth in The Way of Kings. (Brandon Sanderson again)

Seems to be a strong Characteristic Moment, so yay!

2. The Inciting Incident

Ah, nice. *nodnod* That definitely helps make her get going, but cooould be merging a bit with the Moment of Truth…

Is there a point in which she’s forced to act, but keeps with her first way of living? Does she have someone talk her into it, but she’s a bit scared of having to change?

3. The Moment of Truth

Hm. I feeeeel that this should be a bit more decisive. Ideally, it should be going 100% against her instincts. Maybe weave that in a bit more to make it stronger and keep the readers hooked? Try maybe pointing out more that she really had to fight within herself to trust that she would be able to do that. Have her struggle more with the idea.

4. The Period of Despair

Oh dear. *hugs her*

5. The Surge of Strength

Ooooooh, nice. Part of this still is very much in the Moment of Despair, but it still fits because she has gained a resolve.

6. The Denouement

(Woot! Go you! *hands you coffee*)

Yeeeeeup. Sort of fits for an ending, Probably will work better once you write it and know for certain what you’re doing.. 😛

 

 

Nice work! I like it, and it pretty well fits the structure. See if you can heighten the tension at those few points, but otherwise, yay!