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@anne-of-lothlorien

Yes, here in the south I could divide the people into four-ish sections (very generally). There are people who go overboard on the gentleman part, and use it as a cover up, or in a showy way (teaching their children to be that way)… There are people who are true gentlemen and teach their children to be so. There are people who don’t know exactly what to do, but seem to understand that there is something to do. And there are people who are rude (as there always will be in a fallen world). I personally have come across all for of these groups. But even so, I can’t remember ever being treated ill because I was gentlemanly. When you get farther north, east, and west, I see a feminist view that doesn’t want the man to hold the door. I have not seen that here.

Second… Yes… I am six one. But that’s my job! It’s fare… Or at least ideally it’s fare. Because if the bigger men are doing their job, there is far less of a vulnerability in the smaller women. I know you were joking a little… But even so.

Thirdly… When I talk about guys intimidating girls I’m not talking about anything explicit. I’m talking about something that probably flies under the radar for most guys even… And this is where we might look at etiquette. When I walk into a room with a girl for one I work to make sure that there is at least another girl… hopefully more people. Why? Because I don’t want to put her in a position of feeling unsafe. If I am in a room with a girl (an elevator for instance), unless I am actively, I will let her be in the position where she can escape. Not because I expect that she will need to escape, but because if I as the bigger man have the door, she would have to go through me to escape. I don’t want to stand between a girl and safety.

So if a guy and a girl walk in a room together, and he is standing between her and the door he is setting up (even if he doesn’t mean to) a compromising situation. But if they are alone, he should not be between her and the exit. Now of course there are exceptions. If we are in a room that has no exit, and bad guys are coming I will stand between her and the door, so I can intercept the bad guys. But others wise, I will calculate where I stand, so as not be to intimidating.

Forthly… When I play a game with girls I will be more calculative with them (on how I play) than with boys. I’m not going to run into a girl like I would a boy (even within the rules). There is a difference. That doesn’t mean I’m treating them like weaklings, but I am treating them as women.

Fifthly… Dances in their proper format are amazing! And I hope you can go to them some day!

Sixthly… It makes me really mad to hear about you being treated that way. I (being a guy) have never had to deal with that kind of thing, but I would guess that it’s really scary, in which case tree climbing could be very helpful.

Seventhly… I understand not taking medicine, and that mix sounds amazing!

Eighthly… It would be so cool if there was an SE conference!

Ninthly… I cannot legally recommend anything… But in my experience I would look at two things for myself: A) Is my diet healthy. Because medicine cannot make up for a poor diet. B) If my diet is fine (and actually healthy) I would look at something to relax my muscles. I might use lavender directly on the skin… There might be some teas I would use, but I would want to research first. And again… I have not recommended anything 😉