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@anne-of-lothlorien

I couldn’t sleep… so I came back.

And please allow me to explain the idea of chivalry, and why it’s understood as s code that men in particular are to uphold:

The code of chivalry is something that knights were to follow… because they were in a place of power. There was (at least for some time) an understanding that the knight had a duty in that place of power and authority. So a code was set up. A code that when people followed, they were seen as being knightly. Because that’s what a knight was supposed to be. I think we would sum the code of chivalry up by saying, the two greatest commandments that Jesus spoke of.

So the idea is not that women can’t follow it. It’s that men, in their place of power are being knightly when they follow it. They are showing their respect even in power. It’s a way of serving from a place of power. So when a man opens a door for you, he is making a statement that he values your time and resources that you should have to open a door. It’s not that you can’t. Also, think about the context of the family. If the husband opens the door, he is making way for the wife who very well might have a baby in her hand. He is saying how glad he is that she is there to carry and care for his children, and that he is going to sacrifice to enable her to do that. But he is also there at the door making sure everyone makes it in. He is the vanguard.

So what I’m saying is that essentially it is a code that the chivalrous men follow… so that the women don’t have to. Yes, women can be kind, but chivalry refers to a certain aspect of that, which is applied to me.

I hope that adds clarity…

I would argue that the relationship between Faramir and Eowyn is very well set up, and because of the way he wrote the characters, it didn’t require much to sew it together brilliantly.