Activity

@parker Thank you for showing me those places – I didn’t realize there were so many.  Ever since someone told me how many I used to use (and there were a lot more than just these) I have been struggling to change that.  I’m glad you noticed!
I love that Spurgeon quote, too!  So true and so motivating!

@h-jones Yes, Sergio has a backup story.  I would love to write this story sometime, but life is busy right now.  However, I’ll be thinking about it, and hopefully get around to it soon!  Keep me on it!

@taylorclogston Thank you so much for your feedback!  I am so glad you wrote all this down!
I never thought about how much the environment ought to affect the story before, but now you mention it, I realize it’s so true.  I will definitely get around to that!
Yes, I do make use of fillers and adverbs.  They are my weakness, and I still struggle with them a lot.  Are there any places that particularly bothered you – apart from the ones Parker mentioned?
And that line about the man not disappearing does seem really silly. 😛
You’re right.  The “sleek countenance” line I wrote, not because it fit with that passage, but because I liked how it sounded.  You asked me “What does it look like to have terror and rage transform a sleek countenance?”  I could see it in my eyes as I wrote, but I didn’t have my reader in mind.
Thank you so much for taking the time to write all this out for me.  I really appreciate it!  I helps me remember that I’m not the best and it’s teaching me a lot.  Please, if there’s anything else I can work on, please let me know!  Thanks!