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@ethan-leonard

haha. thank you for your interest. It is nothing like the steamy love stories of modern ilk… if that’s what you are asking. It is a love story only in that this is a story of how the parents of my main character for a book series I am writing met… yeah, not confusing, eh… It was meant to be a short story of how my MC’s parents met. lol. 60,000 words later…. I’ve got a full-blown short novel on my hands.

There isn’t even so much as a kiss until the last scene, which is two years after the rest of the book when the two are married. It is a story of adventure where a doctor who is desparately attempting to redeem an evil past meets and attempts to save a war general who is running away from his own evil past – of deeds done during the war – as they slowly fall in love with each other while trying to stay alive.

Here is a link you can use to read my manuscript via google docs…

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1qkFnMaYylWtV0TuCIqZsEq4QaBKswWpt5VW1l11QM48/edit?usp=sharing

@e-n-leonard

I’ve actually got a lot of flack for having the three kids there in that scene. I am thinking of rewriting that whole scene so either there are no kids, or perhaps keep the teenager and the kid but trim it down a lot… not sure. Any suggestions there would be greatly appreciated!

that’s a really good point… as written, it’s more like she gets caught up in the moment. and it’s his life compared to a broken leg, a cough, and a lady in the middle of her pregnancy… so nothing life-threatening or time-sensitive per se…. but without Hanniumm’s tremendous healing ability, he would have died, realistically, even before reaching Aefflaed’s home…

but I think you are on to something there… she destroyed many men’s lives in her sordid past, so when she was saved from that life style, she feels like any failure to save a life is like failing to make up for it and brings back thoughts of her worthlessness and feels she would have to name herself a murderer, I guess. I have to think deeper on that…. it would be good addition to the tension…

lol. glad it doesn’t gag you! lol. Aefflaed isn’t fully aware of her attraction to him at first, then when she realizes it, she fights against it somewhat and weakly… till the end. I firmly believe that true romance is in the relationship, not the sauce. And it’s the relationship that makes the “sauce” so epic when you have a truly beautiful romance. And THAT type of romance is the type that sticks with you and is ever memorable, I think… any who… lol probably preaching to the choir.

Hanniumm’s temper triggering bad memories… that is a good thought… unfortunately, red district and that lifestyle isn’t typically traumatic due to anger issues… If Hanniumm had attempted at any time to reach out and touch Aefflaed for any reason, I could definitely see it triggering her, but for the most part, Aefflaed is the one reaching out to touch Hanniumm – to treat him. She was saved and taught/trained by a doctor, so doctoring is her ‘safe zone’ so to speak. That’s why she can feign strength while doctoring Hanniumm, even though she is secretly insecure.

lol. the diamond incident was something added after the first draft, and I was really happy I added it. lol. It will actually be an important detail in my second Abirami book…(wink wink – foreshadowing…..)

With the essence backfire thing, the first mention of curse was just that, to let the reader know that curses are real in this world. That story is actually not connected to Cairbre at all.

ah. I will have to look at that and reword it. Nicte and Yaxkin are my favorite characters to write, I think… they’re the comedic relief, so to speak. Twins with diametrically opposing personalities (wicked grin).

hmm… erratic in a bad way? I want him to be enigmatic and a bit mysterious to the end… but perhaps it’s not as easily seen, but you may note… his wrath always shows up whenever Aefflaed or Hanniumm put themselves down…. “if I survive the coming battle…” “I don’t deserve…” etc.      The king is another favorite of mine, if only cause of his great wisdom….any advice that would make his character better, I’d love to hear!

YAY!!!! (grin grin grin grin).       They are Abirami’s parents. (grin).

what type of goal?

bingo! yep. it didn’t effect her cause she has no essence to trigger it. Now, it still effected her, but it didn’t kill her cause it triggers death upon essence use, like the first curse that was used on the king’s troops. Plus, she would be contagious, meaning anyone who touched her would be cursed as well, which is why the blessing was necessary…. (this curse/counter curse is actually why Abirami is mixed-blood but is still able to have the abilities of a full blooded Aygiff, while normally a mixed blood would have an extremely weak essence… ie. only able to transform into only one animal at most… an important background fact for Abirami’s book series)

yay! the message got through! I’m glad, cause there are parts where Aefflaed erroneously thinks first that she must earn it, and then after the second encounter with the king thinks she must forgive herself, then realizing she may never reach a position where she can forgive herself, on the third meeting with the king, after the battle, she learns to trust the One who has chosen and forgiven. =)

oh, so glad! I was worried it was kinda short and choppy, separated from the rest of the book like that. so glad it worked for you…

and… the ending is a great segway to the Abirami book series =) called Adventures of the Last Aygiff.

haha. I’ve been considering it but not sure how to separate them out. If I do, I most likely will not be naming the chapters. My books in Adventures of the Last Aygiff do have named chapters… perhaps I didn’t just because I originally planned for Aefflaed’s Weakness to be a short story…. (lol.  In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps…. no? wink wink)