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  • calidris replied to the topic Character Castle 2.0 in the forum Fantasy Writers 3 years, 8 months ago

    @this-is-not-an-alien

    WAIT YOU GOT AN OFFICIAL DIAGNOSIS!?!?!?!?!?!!?!??!

    Yeah!  I was pretty young at the time – I actually can’t remember why my parents got me tested but it’s probably because I was having trouble concentrating at school.

    I actually don’t know the origins of the name

    Hans Asperger was an Austrian scientist who collaborated with the Nazis and sent a lot of disabled/autistic children to their deaths (the Nazis were trying to eradicate disabled people, and obviously they weren’t going to spare kids)

    but I do know I haven’t pursued getting a diagnosis because of ablism – among other reasons – and malpractice.

    SAME ok so when I was younger I was “undiagnosed” with Asperger’s because the psychiatrist probably wasn’t very knowledgeable about autism in girls (honestly a concerning amount of them aren’t.)  Obviously it was a doctors appointment of sorts and I felt very uncomfortable, so I was masking extra hard…so he just thought I wasn’t very autistic.  For a while I wanted to get re-diagnosed, but I heard a lot of stories about autistic women who were basically gaslighted and ignored by psychiatrists, or even diagnosed with personality disorders instead, so I think I won’t try and pursue that.

    Also during Covid there were states that basically issued protocols de-prioritizing disabled people in the case of limited medical resources.  Like, if I had a diagnosis it could actually be used to discriminate against me!  I could (theoretically) lose my life because some people believe that I’m less worthy of life because I’m autistic.  And lets not even get started on the fact that a lot of people want to screen for autism in the womb so they can abort autistic babies 🙁

    Also just the stereotyping?  The fact that a lot of people actually believe that autistic people don’t have emotions (some of us feel SO deeply,) or that media just portrays us as vaguely “weird” without actually exploring why we’re different and all the different aspects of that (and how some of this really is subjective.)  Also not all autistic people are weird?  Like, I know this obviously isn’t the case with all autistic people, but I actually have really good social skills!  This isn’t to say that I’m better than anyone, but it is a (sometimes valid) stereotype and it needs to be addressed and handled better.

    Idk, I just think a lot of people don’t realize how real ableism is, and how it really is a legitimate form of discrimination that’s very socially acceptable right now.  It’s also one reason why I think my neurodivergent characters are so important to me.  It’s not something I originally meant to include, but it just grew organically because I kind of share parts of myself with them and those parts of myself happen to be neurodivergent XD  Tbh I think it’s also a way of exploring some of the painful parts of my past that I’ve experienced because of this while – especially with Val in particular, I just poured a lot of that pain into her and it’s honestly given me a great way to address that and work through that hurt.  It’s been very therapeutic ngl.

    But also, I just get so much joy out of the fact that all of my neurodivergent characters are so, so PRETTY like they could all be models and it makes me so happy :’)

    I actually did have a supremely horrible idea (realization?) that one day Kit will model for something and there’s absolutely nothing I can do to stop him…

    Also autistic characters are always portrayed as so unappealing and frumpy, and it’s sad because we can be attractive too?  And it’s SUCH a prevalent stereotype.  In a lot of ways I guess I’m fortunate because I really don’t fit the stereotype in that sense, like I’m good at masking and I’m pretty, so I think to a lot of people I come across as “normal,” and I get treated pretty well.  I don’t think I’ve ever experienced blatant discrimination, so I’m really blessed in that sense.

    Also no one tell Kit I said he’s pretty, he’ll never let me live it down XD

    Worst fear being put on drugs to “cure” me just for science-experiment for them and then getting drug dependent or certified insane or something super bad like that!!!

    I’m glad you’ve found a system that works well for you!  Personally, I really want to go back on meds because I could actually focus and read, but we’ll see!  Also judging by your posts I’m guessing you’re WAY more hyperactive than I am, so idk if meds would do anything for you because I don’t have that experience, and honestly if you’re thriving without them then you obviously don’t need to be taking them!

    ALSO ALSO ALSO if you have tips on writing ADHD characters I’d love to hear more about your experience!  I feel like Kit’s experience is probably closer to yours than mine, so if you have anything you’d like to share by all means feel free to do so!

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