December 14, 2019 at 5:02 pm #102720Veraza Winterknight@kari-karast
@katthewriter Okay, sounds good! Sometimes people just have mistaken impressions so I just wanted to let you know. XP I’d love to be tagged!
"You can dance with my henchman."December 14, 2019 at 9:55 pm #102739
Okay, cool! Though aftet it you won’t like me with what i do to her 😛 >:)
Btw, if your okay with telling, whats your actual name? I wasnt sure with the name and tagging being different.December 15, 2019 at 12:09 am #102747Veraza Winterknight@kari-karast
Oh dear. XD Consider me warned.
Neither are my real name, actually. Veraza Winterknight is my pen name. Kari Karast is my character’s name. I didn’t want to put my real name up on a forum that anyone wandering the internet could see, but I didn’t have a pen name when I created the account, so I stole my character’s. XP
"You can dance with my henchman."December 17, 2019 at 4:25 am #102844Selah CJW@selah-chelyah
Ok, cool! Tag me when you have it up! 🙂
Assistant Guildmaster of the Phantom Awesome Meraki
~ Created to create ~December 26, 2019 at 5:56 pm #103204Esther Sears@esther-sears
Hey! I might be late to the party, but I read your story and enjoyed it! I’m glad your continuing with it and making it better 🙂 Keep it up!
Lover of Christ, writer (obviously...), fangirl, and a proud Meerkat!January 28, 2020 at 12:06 pm #104627
@taylorclogston this is the story i entered into the contest. Btw the horse stuff is a join up, which is a way to get a horse to want to join with you, to be in your herd.
But like i said i killed it, so would you like me to tag you to the new snippets?February 4, 2020 at 4:30 pm #105300
Hey I’m sorry. I really blew you off cuz i was having a bad day.
I’m willing to here what you thought was wrong in the horse aspect, even if i don’t agree with it.February 4, 2020 at 10:34 pm #105333
Thanks for reconsidering. I just wanted to help.
First of all, I would like to assure you that I’m qualified to say anything at all. While I do not personally own a horse for reasons beyond my control, I do spend around half my summer working personally with them and my winter months are dedicated to studying for hippology contests. If you don’t know what those are, they’re basically entire contest based around knowledge of all equines. They are not easy. Any problems I’ve found most likely wouldn’t be noticeable to anyone who hasn’t spent as much time with horses as I have.
Okay, the things I noticed.
First thing that struck me was when you mentioned how fast the horse was going. You say he’s racing too fast, but then you say he’d cantering. That doesn’t make sense. If you were lunging you’d want him at a canter. If you changed the word canter to gallop that would be fixed.
Second thing. You say that she’s scared, which I perfectly understand. I’ve been on the end of a rope holding a spooked horse. It’s terrifying. Maybe we just process fear differently, but she doesn’t seem to be consistent. One minute she’s calm and collected, the next she’s compulsively repeating words. There is just something that feels wrong to me in her reaction, I’m not sure what. But, I know when I had a horse spook all I could do what babble soothingly until she calmed down. Granted, it was a mare spooking at a sled I was training her to pull. So, I’m not sure if you really need to fix anything here.
Third. I think there would be more clarity if you added a moment where the horse slowed down. The horse should be running, but not in terror. This horse is traumatized, so yes, he’d be out of control in the beginning. But, once he started to trust the girl he’d slow down to a canter, and start asking to stop. Maybe since there didn’t seem to be a breakthrough before she through down the rope this isn’t necessary. But, I think using this you might be able to make it even more powerful.
Lastly, the one big thing I was missing was switching directions. When you’re lunging, or joining up, direction changes are the most important part. When you ask the horse to change directions you’re drawing their attention back to you and trying to appeal to the thinking part of the horse’s brain. If Yuri were to make the bay switch directions a lot it would help him calm down. He’d have to think, not just react.
If you’ve worked with horses you’re whole life and knew all this I’m sorry. But, I really liked the idea behind the story, and I’ve read so many horse books where they don’t get it right that even small problems like the ones I saw here stick out like sore thumbs.
I hope this is the kind of critique you were looking for.
How we chose to fight is just as important as what we fight forFebruary 4, 2020 at 10:42 pm #105334
Hey, I was wondering. I don’t know if your a kid like me or an adult, but you seem to really like horses. I can tell by your story. I really love them too, but I don’t have any friends who understand. Would you talk about them with me? Ignore me if I’m totally off base here, but no one else seems to understand my desperate passion or need to be with horses.
How we chose to fight is just as important as what we fight forFebruary 9, 2020 at 9:14 pm #105692
Sorry! We were traveling, lining at houses where we are going to move.
Ik what those test ate, but i also know the snooty people who do stuff like that but then freak out cyz they’re horse got bit by another horse or rolled in the mud. *rolls eyes* Do they not know what horses actually act like if they’re not cooped up in a stall? ?
1st. She was doing a join up. And yeah i guess. Though i murdered this story so it doesn’t matter.
2nd. She’s getting flashbacks from the past which is what is scaring her. I’ve had a horse rear up near me. And I’ve onpurpose made all 5 of them run.
3rd. Um.. the horse does slow down. .? To a trot, turning an ear towards her, thinking about excepting her as a herd leader.
4th. Oh yeah i guess i did forget changing directions. Thanks. But anywsy this is murdered. In my RIP files.
Not my while life, but have done Parelli Hosemanship the last two years. So liberty, bare back pads, communication is my thing. Though i actually wrote this before i had to do in the pasture join up.
ThanksFebruary 9, 2020 at 9:19 pm #105693
Idk if I’m a kid or an adult either. .. xD I’m 18.
Love horses. No one understands so i never get to talk about the awesome couple hours i spend with them each time. Cuz after a sentence I’ll hear ‘cool’ in the uninterested way. ..
I like being on the ground more than riding. Just all the games, and communications eye to eye. It feels more like we’re working together than I’m making them have to do everything and carry me. And its easier for me to read what they’re saying.February 9, 2020 at 11:19 pm #105706
I understand trashing a story, I had to give up one of mine. I’m much happier with the one I’m working on now.
Yeah, no one understands my love for them either. I come from a family of city people, I don’t think anyone is my family for at least four generations has owned any animal larger than a dog, so my Mom really wasn’t prepared for a horse loving kid. But I can’t give her enough credit for everything she’s done for me.
My entire family has been dragged into my passion, and my sisters are a little sick of it. I come back from just brushing someone elses horses beaming, while they just try to change the subject as quickly as they can. But, overall they’ve been really understanding.
What really bugs me is some of the members of my horse club. There’s this one girl who is on her second horse now, she ruined her first one and he might have been sold as a bucking horse, I’m not sure. She’s been given everything, and she won’t ride alone, and doesn’t come to club rides because it cuts in on her boyfriend time. The horse she’s on now was given to her for free by a mutual friend. The horse has been to several riding clinics and is a beautiful Arabian mare, and all this girl can do is complain about her.
Sorry to be complaining to you, but I haven’t met anyone who I can talk to about this stuff besides you. No one around here seems to understand that it’s possible to love horses and like to ride, instead of loving to ride and liking horses.
How we chose to fight is just as important as what we fight forFebruary 10, 2020 at 1:52 am #105708
No I’m not tasher her story, just that one cuz it was rushed with the word count and everything. I’ll write her a novel one day. But because I don’t want the stress of figuring out how the plot goes and such, with already 2-3 other main projects, I’m just doing short snippets before she was in this home. I have posted 3 that I’ve written. I can tag you to one or two to see if you’ll like them or not. They don’t have horses yet. She’s still scared of ‘big smelly beasts’ as she calls them xD (i have like 20 WIPs btw)
Well my mom grew up with horses. But there’s a 5 year old and 2 year old boys so there’s not much tine left on get mind for horses. ..
Well i mean bucking broncs still do what they like xD. Though not if they went from well trained to that. .cuz he/she is just going into fight/flight mode. (Left brained thinking? Or am i backwards, left that’s more fight flight, right that’s more thinking over? Or vise versa. I haven’t had a Parelli book in so long xD)
Ah, yes. When i move i think i will find lots of snobs like that. You know the ones who get mad at there horse when he doesn’t do absolutely perfect at a show? And usually its their own fault. I mean if i was the horse, and she was always being rude and mean, i wouldn’t listen well. Of course they wouldn’t be in synch becauae they arnt partners. Its a one sided relationship. Is she one of the kind that won’t brush, or wash (bonding) or just hang out with her horse? Or scoop horse poop? XD i do that alot for 5 horses worth in a arena. XD
Its totally okay! I Loooovveee talking about horses!
Oh and when we move there’s this Egyptian Arabian farm that takes internships over the summer, and when i called i think they liked me! !! 😀
Yes just hanging with the horse is more fun then riding. Like hanging with a friend. Lol. I’m better with horses than people.February 11, 2020 at 12:35 am #105736Sink@sarah-inkdragon
Thought I’d just pop in because I too like horses. XD
Btw, Kat, you might try checking out Monty Robert’s video on join up if you ever write it again! He explains it very well and I really like him as a trainer. 🙂 It’s a cool video.
Personally, I don’t really show because I can’t deal with the community of the show world and some of the things that are allowed in it. 😐 I’m planning on getting back into in someday, but for now I’m into endurance racing, which in my opinion is really fun. It’s basically cross-country running for horses, with the shortest distance being 25 miles. I competed in my first LD(25 mile ride) last summer with my Arab X mare and we did pretty well. 😉 I’m currently on the market for a nice Morgan to become my all-around stock horse, and possibly a cutting/reining horse if I decide to get back into showing. (Morgans are handsome XD. I’m not into QH/Paints.)
Until then I’ll be going through an Equine B.S. at a college nearby to get on the way for a vet degree(if I decide to follow that… but for now that’s what I’m planning.) 🙂
*vader vibes*February 11, 2020 at 7:02 pm #105921
Ah, now I understand. I’m not saying this because I don’t care, really I do care, and I don’t want to sound mean. But, I just don’t have time to read the snippets. *drops head on desk* It is so hard to not seem like a monster on the internet.
Yeah, he might enjoy what he does more now. But it really wasn’t fair. He was a good horse when they got him, but when they gave up they tried to take him to these guys who take problem horses, but they wouldn’t keep him because they were afraid he’d kill them.
*reads last part of post* *squeals* Egyptian Arabians. Awesome! There’s an former Arabian breeding facility just outside of my town. I used to go out there and help the owner do light therapy on a pony that belonged to a friend of mine. They had an Egyptian Arabian stallion there named Wings in the Desert. He was tiny, but one of the most beautiful horses I’ve ever seen. But, that one was just boarded there. Their prize stallion is a descendant of the one who played The Black Stallion in the movie.
Nice of you to join us. I don’t like showing either, but since I don’t own a horse and live in such a rural area I don’t have much of a chance anyway.
You endurance ride! Equally awesome. I might be doing my first this summer, we’ll see. I love Arabians, the mare I’ve been riding is one, but I’ve always wanted to ride a Morgan. I’ve never seen one, but I love them anyway.
Quarter horses and Paints make up about 3/4ths of the horses I see. I’m a bit tired of it. But, I can’t help but love paints. The first horse I ever loved was a paint *tears up* his name was Micah. *chokes on the lump in my throat* I don’t know if I have time for that sad story, unless you guys want to hear it.
My current plan for college is to go into horses, and then after college take the classes to become a fully trained librarian.
- This reply was modified 4 months, 4 weeks ago by Kayla Skywriter.
How we chose to fight is just as important as what we fight for
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