- This topic has 580 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 4 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
Heyo! I’ve got another deadline. . . tomorrow. . . so I could use one. 😛 I’m only going to be semi-present, but I’m willing to go if you want to!
Hearts are like matter--they can be beaten down, torn, and burned, but they cannot be destroyed.
@naiya-dyani Awesome! 10 at :50?
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas Beauvallet@anne_the_noob14 Sure!
Hearts are like matter--they can be beaten down, torn, and burned, but they cannot be destroyed.
@naiya-dyani Just now starting it lol. Was helping my mom with a quilt she’s making.
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas Beauvallet@anne_the_noob14 Haha, and I was cleaning up . . . will set my timer soon as I’m able XD
Hearts are like matter--they can be beaten down, torn, and burned, but they cannot be destroyed.
@naiya-dyani XD Alrighty!
I got 143. Not what I was hoping, but progress nonetheless 😛
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas BeauvalletAlso, quick question. How could I rephrase this?
____
Dharin flipped his hood back from his face, revealing a strong jaw and chestnut hair, and leaned his head back against the tree. The moon shone off the soft waves that framed his face.
____
I want to convey that he has a strong jawline and shoulder-length, chestnut-colored hair. But I can’t figure out a non-messy way of putting it. Above is the best thing I’ve come up with so far.
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas BeauvalletHope you don’t mind me popping in, here. 🙂 I read your description and I really like it! It gives me a strong image. I might change up some simple grammar, split the sentences differently, but overall I like the wording! I personally am a huge fan of character description.
"Write the vision, and make it plain on tablets, that he may run who reads it."
Habakkuk 2:2@hope-mcclellan Not at all! 😀 Oh good!! What changes would you make with it?
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas BeauvalletAnother question, for whoever happens to know the answer lol. Is there a specific word for the fight that happens between two people with rapiers? I know it can be called a duel, but that can refer to other types of swordplay as well, can’t it?
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas BeauvalletFrom this: Dharin flipped his hood back from his face, revealing a strong jaw and chestnut hair, and leaned his head back against the tree. The moon shone off the soft waves that framed his face.
To this:
Dharin flipped his hood back, revealing a strong jaw and chestnut hair. As he leaned his head back against the tree, the moon shone off the soft waves that framed his face.
"Write the vision, and make it plain on tablets, that he may run who reads it."
Habakkuk 2:2@hope-mcclellan Ooo I like it 😀 Small changes can sometimes make all the difference in the world lol
"Reck not."
~Sir Nicholas BeauvalletHola! I haven’t been around in a bit (because…I’ll be honest, I haven’t touched a writing project since NaNo ended last November), but April camp and this quarantine business has given me the time and ambition to do some more work. I am sorry, I don’t even know who’s around to tag! but I’m doing a spot of writing and am interested in a war, if anyone wants to join in.
Laura Waldorf. Christian, writer, dreamer, sub-creator of beauty.
Hello! Â I started a project for April camp as well, and totally forgot about it until now! Â I will be available for a word war in about 15-20 minutes or so!
"One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it's worth watching." -Gerard Way
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
