Critique For The Fledgling Poet?

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  • #107318
    The Fledgling Artist
    @the-fledgling-artist

    @evelyn
    The short answer is, I don’t really know yet. *muffled laugh/crying*

    The longer answer, is I don’t really know yet, but,
    it’s a story that takes place in a fantasy world of people who resemble elves, but also kinda resemble fauns. (But more than anything else they just look like people, lol.) There are probably several kingdoms, but there are only two relevant to the story. They’re sister kingdoms that once were one, but for whatever reason (once I figure out said reason, it’ll be rad) they split into the two in the distant past. Now every so often (possibly once every generation, but it might be more like every 3rd  generation?? dk, lol) they have one child from each royal family betrothed to one another as a sort of symbol of their continued unification, even though they’ve been severed. The main character was a girl who’s betrothed to a guy (he was the secondary character) and was going to follow them on an adventure put into motion by the guy character’s brother (who’s kinda angsty and stupid, hehe.) but then I realized he (the stupid/angsty kid) has the biggest change arc, and has the most agency of the three characters, so I think he (who was my antagonist) is now my protagonist?? So the story plot is up in the air, but they’d be doing all sorts of fantasy quest junk, whilst the main story was actually about the relationship between the two brothers/kinda also the girl too, because she’s significant.
    That makes no sense, but that’s a messy summery.
    Oh yeah, and there’d be fuzzy mountain snowcat things, cloud dragons, and this cool mapstone thing. C:
    It’s weird, ’cause the previous protagonist has existed for almost 3 years now, but her story has changed so much. And now she isn’t even a protagonist anymore. x’D Funny how that happens. I don’t doubt things will change a lot in the next 3- or maybe even 13 years. Who knows how long this thing will simmer before it’s good to go, yk?

    Hehe, now, did you really expect to get away with asking that question without me asking you back? What’s your story about? The one you really really care about?

    I might have a drawing of my use-to-be-protagonist… (Oh yeah, and her name has changed in the past few weeks, haha. For years it was Aspen, but now it’s Ansley.)

    "Though I'm not yet who I will be, I'm no longer who I was."

    #107319
    The Fledgling Artist
    @the-fledgling-artist


    *boops*

    "Though I'm not yet who I will be, I'm no longer who I was."

    #107363
    Evelyn
    @evelyn

    @the-fledgling-artist THAT CHARACTER

    Your art ssrly tho. I can never ever get over it. <3 <3 <3

    Awww, the story sounds amazing.

    Oh yeah, and there’d be fuzzy mountain snowcat things, cloud dragons, and this cool mapstone thing

    Okie. I’m really sold now. O.o

    Hehe, now, did you really expect to get away with asking that question without me asking you back?

    Heh heh. I hadn’t thought about that. Thanks a lot. 😆

    I can try to give a good overview. I’ve been trying to improve on my summaries. 😛 (Because all my stories sound especially stupid when someone asks about them…*facepalm*)

    So it’s called 51 and I kinda adore all the characters but it’s a huge experiment in style and storytelling, especially since it’s a sci-fi/dystopian/action thing, genres I’ve never really written in. (I hesitate to say sci-fi tho because that always makes me think spaceships, but no, no spaceships, just time-travel. 😛 ) It all started with wondering how it would effect someone’s stability and emotional and mental state to be able to time-travel. So it starts out with this young man named Zeb who lives in the future, had a tough childhood in a poor side of town, and is on his way to a ivy league school he somehow got accepted to. However, the day before he leaves, his father is randomly shot at a concert and the murderer disappears without a trace. Suddenly Zeb gets all these notes that are warning him about the school and telling me to stay away or else. Nervously, he ignores the weird notes, shrugging them off as some kind of scam, but once he gets to the university, he gets kidnapped and realizes he for some reason became a pawn in this time-traveling war. So he meets a lot of people, goes a lot of places, and has to learn to deal with some stuff.

    There’s all this intrigue and interesting scenes and places and this whole time-travelling culture, but I don’t want to spoil it. 😉

    Right now I have the book chopped up in big chunks, each told in first person perspective by a different character. And the times all loop and overlap and stuff.

    *clears throat*

    Something like that. (:

    #107413
    The Fledgling Artist
    @the-fledgling-artist

    @evelyn oohhh! That sounds awesome! It’s definitely something I would read. C: Good summery, haha. Maybe someday I’ll learn enough about my story to summarize it in a way that makes sense. 😆

    "Though I'm not yet who I will be, I'm no longer who I was."

    #107419
    Evelyn
    @evelyn

    @the-fledgling-artist haha thanks. Every time I write up a summary I look back at my book and think. “Wow if only it was that cool.” 😆

    It helps me get back on track sometimes tho and remember to step back and look at the story from a reader’s POV.

    #107445
    The Fledgling Artist
    @the-fledgling-artist

    @evelyn Oh hush you. 😛 No need for self depreciation here. In my humble opinion, it likely is that cool. 😉😉
    Isn’t it funny how creative types are often so hard on themselves? Do try to be nice to yourself, or else I’ll have to resort to most unpleasant measures! Idk what those measures are, lol, but mark my words. They will be moST unpleasant indeed!

    "Though I'm not yet who I will be, I'm no longer who I was."

    #107964
    Evelyn
    @evelyn

    @the-fledgling-artist Hahaha okie then. 😆

    I actually have some theories about this topic from interacting with some friends.

    1. They are immersed in watching “the best of the best” and so they have high standards that they don’t reach.
    2. They want real heart-felt compliments, but they don’t trust people, so they hate compliments and refuse to accept them.
    3. They have trained themselves to look forward, not backward, and so are focused on growing, not how much they have grown.
    4. They frequently see other people’s best, but not other people’s worst.
    5. They are impatient with themselves and they funnel frustration into degrading comments in a type of self-pity.
    6. They have context to their work and can see the “mistakes.” Especially when trying to copy a work.

    …a couple of my ideas behind low self-esteem in artists. 😛

    #108548
    The Fledgling Artist
    @the-fledgling-artist

    @evelyn
    ouch
    😅😅😂

    "Though I'm not yet who I will be, I'm no longer who I was."

    #108554
    Evelyn
    @evelyn

    @the-fledgling-artist Aaaam I wrong though?? 😂🤔

    #108558
    The Fledgling Artist
    @the-fledgling-artist

    @evelyn
    Not at all, 😂😅😅
    That’s why it hurts, lol 😥😥😂

    "Though I'm not yet who I will be, I'm no longer who I was."

    #108582
    Evelyn
    @evelyn

    @the-fledgling-artist Exactly. 😆 You’re welcome. 😉

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