fb

Concept Feedback

Forums Fiction General Writing Discussions Concept Feedback

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 18 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #123113
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    Hi all! IΒ might have yet another question. Ahem. πŸ™‚

    So I recently did a webinar with the amazing Brett Harris on a good publishing path, and one thing he mentioned was having multiple stories to show an agent or whatever when you’re trying to get published. I realized I really only had one, possibly two ideas, so I started coming up with more.

    Another thing that he said (and that was repeated in the newsletter, I think) was that getting feedback on a story’s concept before writing it. So here’s a concept that I’d like feedback on! (Also, anyone else feel free to post concepts you’d like feedback on here too!)

    Leaper:

    A story about a girl from Earth gets a visit from someone from another world asking for her help. She finds out that she has the power to “leap” from world to world, and that there are 2 (or maybe 4, I can’t decide yet) other talented people out there in the worlds that she needs to connect. The villain has managed to somehow clone or something 3 (or 5) people with the exact same talents as said Leaper and pals, and he uses them to try and stop them (for what nefarious purposes I haven’t yet figured out.)

    As you can see, it needs some more brainstorming. πŸ™‚ But from that little bit, what do y’all think?


    @mischievous-thwapling


    @zee


    @crazywriter


    @wingiby-iggiby


    @rusted-knight


    @this-is-not-an-alien

    Thank you!

    "Lacho calad! Drego morn!"

    #123118
    Beth Darlene
    @beth20

    Hey,

    I think that sounds like a good concept so far! The only thing, you’ll have to be really careful not being to cliche. Books and movies and stuff dealing with people from earth, and other people from other planets or worlds seem to be the same thing…

    But, what you have so far doesn’t seem cliche!

    Hope that helps lol!

    Jominkreesa! For the weirdos who know what it means! πŸ˜‰ I love you guys!

    #123120
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    @beth20,

    Cliches are something I really really really struggle with, so thanks for the warning (and the feedback)! πŸ™‚

    "Lacho calad! Drego morn!"

    #123187
    Beth Darlene
    @beth20

    @joelle-stone

    Yeah!

    Well, if you ever have an idea that you want to ask if it’s cliche in any way, feel free to ask!

    Jominkreesa! For the weirdos who know what it means! πŸ˜‰ I love you guys!

    #123198
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    @beth20,

    Will do, thanks! πŸ™‚

    "Lacho calad! Drego morn!"

    #123199
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    @this-is-not-an-alien,

    Ooh, excellent points! I actually haven’t really thought about it a lot, but one of my siblings pointed out that he/she found a book online that had almost the exact same stuff for the villain. So now we’re coming up with family members (so the genetic powers of Leaping (world travel, as you already know), Reading (reading animals’ minds or the memories of rocks, IDK which yet), and Shading (being able to see ultraviolet and whatever the red light is called, along with having something else to do with colors) are passed down) that were taken as babies or whatever by the villain to be used for whatever nefarious purposes I can come up with. πŸ™‚

    And the person picked the girl from Earth because she has the power to leap between worlds, and he needed her to gather Reader and Shader together. πŸ™‚ Still haven’t figured out why. πŸ˜› Will come up with it eventually.

    Soooo hopefully that wasn’t too terribly confusing. πŸ™‚ Thx for the feedback!

    "Lacho calad! Drego morn!"

    #123224
    claire
    @claire-h

    @joelle-stone

    Yes, I got that email too! A very helpful idea… And I can totally relate about things getting too clichΓ©. It’s so easy to fall into the common “groove” of a genre.

    I like how you are trying to brainstorm fresh ideas to change things up. It seems like concepts always sound more clichΓ© than the fully fleshed out idea, so I’m sure you will find more ways to make it unique! πŸ™‚

    My concept right now is one that I’ve been mulling over for a while now. I would love it if you guys could give me some feedback. Tagging a few people: @beth20 @olivia @arindown @zee @the-inkspiller

    It’s a futuristic story set in the jungle of Peru. The main character Rubi lives in the Sanctum Settlement, a special settlement dedicated to seeking out and preserving rare species in the jungle. The atmosphere is a combo of a vibrant Peruvian village and a futuristic town with advanced technology. Rubi’s adoptive father Dren found her alone in the jungle as a child. Rubi’s memory was wiped as a child because of the traumatic event that left her stranded in the jungle. But she doesn’t know what that was. Rubi has wanted answers ever since she learned she had a memory wipe. So when her Ikal, her new trainee in the Sanctum, mentions rumors of a memory bank, it reawakens the questions that have never left her.

    I have a lot more brainstormed. That is mainly just the rough setting and inciting event, so if anyone is confused / wants more info please let me know. Also I’ve been having trouble developing an antagonist so if anyone has any suggestions… XD Just a note: I’ve been trying to come up with more unique names to replace “memory wipe” and “memory bank”, so those are just placeholders right now.

    • This reply was modified 3 months, 2 weeks ago by claire.

    a flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it.
    it just blooms.

    #123238
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    @claire-h,

    Thanks for the feedback! And you were at the webinar? Cool. πŸ™‚

    Ooh, I have never ever heard anything like that before, which of course makes it unique. I think it’s a very very good idea that will turn out well if you get your facts right. Putting Peru into the future will make things a lot easier. πŸ™‚ As long as you make sure you know what the jungles of Peru are like, I think it’ll turn out nicely. πŸ™‚ Good luck!

    "Lacho calad! Drego morn!"

    #123274
    Zee
    @zee

    My personal opinion is that any story, however familiar or even borderline “cliche” can be great if it’s written well. It’s not the original idea that’s important so much as the original execution of a familiar idea.

    That being said, I think your initial concept has promise, but I’d want to know more about it before I could pass judgement on whether or not I thought the story would be a good one. Specifically, I’d want to know what motivates your main character/s and your villain/s to do what they do.

    #123276
    Ella
    @writergirl101

    @joelle-stone

    That’s an interesting concept.Β  It kind of reminds me of Keeper of the Lost Cities by Shannon Hale.Β  I like memories of rocks… 😁  I would personally read it!

     

     

    Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

    #123277
    Ella
    @writergirl101

    @claire-h

    I love that idea!Β  I’d always read books about wiped memories/amnesia, lol!!Β  πŸ˜†Β  It’s a cool setting, too.

    Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

    #123291
    Joelle Stone
    @joelle-stone

    @writergirl101,

    Keeper of the Lost Cities? I’ve heard glowing reports of that book, but I’ve never actually read it. πŸ™‚ Maybe I should… thx for the idea! BTW, I love your signature. πŸ™‚


    @zee
    ,

    Thank you for your feedback! I have a few idea as to the motives for the villain:

    1. He knows that other worlds exist and is trying to keep everyone else from figuring that out, because he thinks it’s safer that way.
    2. He thinks a long-lost family member is in another world and wants to find him/her (hence the person showing up at the main character’s door – he’s either the villain’s servant or the villain himself).
    3. He thinks having talents like Leaper, Reader, and Shader’s are too powerful and therefore a threat to his kingdom/country/world.

    In any of those, the villain’s motives are pretty good, but the way he goes about them aren’t. That’s what I’m going for with him.

    Here are some motives for the main character:

    1. Person at her door needs her help, and, as a naturally compassionate person, she agrees after making sure it’s safe (mostly).
    2. She doesn’t really believe him but plays along for the fun of it (then is caught up in an adventure while trying to figure everything out).
    3. Person at her door threatens to hurt/kill someone she loves if she doesn’t go along with him.

    #3 has problems b/c then she’d probably realize that PAD (person at door) is the villain and that would get rid of the surprise factor: “Tada, I’m actually your worst enemy! *cue evil laugh*”

    As you can see, I’m thinking out loud here. πŸ™‚ Which of these do you think works best? Do you have any ideas of your own?

    "Lacho calad! Drego morn!"

    #123292
    Ella
    @writergirl101

    @joelle-stone

    Yassss, read it!!! It’s so good! 😍  And thanks, I like my signature too.

    Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

    #123345
    claire
    @claire-h

    @joelle-stone Thanks for the feedback! No I didn’t have time to attend the webinar… πŸ™ I just saw this idea in his newsletter.


    @zee
    Very true… I’ve been really digging into my characters’ motives, fears, and flaws lately so hopefully I will be able to post those for feedback soon! There are so many layers to developing a concept, lol.


    @writergirl101
    Thank you! πŸ™‚

     

    a flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it.
    it just blooms.

    #123392
    Zee
    @zee

    @joelle-stone, looks like you’ve got a pretty solid set of potential motives for your villain. Any one, or combination of them, could create quite a strong story for him, I think.

    As for your protagonist, I think what you’ve got listed are less goals/motivations and more like what are sometimes called “inciting incidents” the event that forces the character out of his/her normal life into an adventure. They’re all legitimate too, depending on what kind of person your protagonist is, but I like number one the best, probably because it’s the one I’d be most likely to fall for.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 18 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
Story Embers

Pin It on Pinterest