Forums › Fiction › General Writing Discussions › Beta Readers Wanted For My HF Kids’ Short Story
Tagged: Beta Readers, historical fiction, short story, WWI, WWII
- This topic has 7 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 3 years, 9 months ago by
Abigail Rebekah.
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February 7, 2020 at 11:09 pm #105592
Abigail Rebekah
@abigail-rebekahHi fellow writers,
So…I’ve finished writing my first kids’ short story (the age range is 8+), and I would love for some people to beta read it for me if you want to xD
The story is historical fiction, and is about a young boy who is given a poppy seed for his birthday. A couple years later, WWI starts, and he enlists underage. The story journeys through his experiences in both WWI and WWII, and weaves the theme of a poppy throughout the book, as he leaves a poppy seed in every blood-stained battlefield that he fights on, as a tribute to his fallen comrades.
Oh, yeah…and it’s calledΒ The PoppyΒ btw π
The main things I would appreciate getting feedback on would be the flow of the story, theme, if the end is easy to understand, and the main character.
Please feel free to give any other suggestions π
Here’s the link to it…you will have to ask for access tho, btw.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1IKH2XEx16mvUQ4z_I8W4tm-eSsyKEmBxTAKe_Uy02dU/edit
~ Laugh. Drink Coffee. Smile. And Write ~
February 8, 2020 at 11:39 am #105607Jenna Terese
@jenwriter17Hi, @abigail-rebekah! Thanks for letting me know about your story! I was actually going to graciously decline (on account of another beta reading project and other things that are taking up my time), but you’re story sounds too interesting! π I’d love to read it! I just requested access, if that’s okay. π
"If you want to change the world, pick up your pen and write." -Martin Luther
www.jennaterese.comFebruary 8, 2020 at 8:47 pm #105637Abigail Rebekah
@abigail-rebekahAw thanks so much π I really appreciate you doing that.
No worries though if you don’t get to tho π
Yes, that’s totally fine…I granted access btw.
~ Laugh. Drink Coffee. Smile. And Write ~
February 8, 2020 at 11:32 pm #105640Caseybold
@caseybold@abigail-rebekah Ooh congratulations! I’m excited to beta read this ππ Requesting permission now π
I'm nobody, Who are you? -Emily Dickinson λ»μ΄ μλ κ³³μ κΈΈμ΄ μλ€.
February 8, 2020 at 11:43 pm #105641Abigail Rebekah
@abigail-rebekahFebruary 11, 2020 at 2:41 am #105738Abigail Rebekah
@abigail-rebekahThanks so much to both of you for being happy to beta read my story π I really appreciate it, and especially all the helpful feedback you both gave.
Quick question –
Did either of you find it confusing when near the end of the book it changes from first person to third person? I have had a few people say it was confusing, however, one of those was translating the story into tok pisin (PNG language) for missionary purposes, so that was probably making it harder to translate. So…was it confusing or did you understand the change of view?
Also, @jenwriter17, regarding what you said about more dialogue and “show don’t tell” – thanks, that made sense. I’m working on adding more of that in atm π However, I am planning to turn this story into a novel (this one is just the kids’ version π ), so that would hopefully have a lot more of that stuff in π
Anyway, thanks again for reading it for me π
~ Laugh. Drink Coffee. Smile. And Write ~
February 11, 2020 at 11:50 am #105793Jenna Terese
@jenwriter17You’re so welcome! Thanks for contacting me about it. π
I personally didn’t think that switch was confusing, since there was a clear break with the “***”. I actually liked it quite a bit.
Okay, awesome! π Thanks again!
"If you want to change the world, pick up your pen and write." -Martin Luther
www.jennaterese.comFebruary 13, 2020 at 3:45 am #106092Abigail Rebekah
@abigail-rebekahAw thanks π
That’s good to hear…I’m glad you didn’t find it confusing xD
~ Laugh. Drink Coffee. Smile. And Write ~
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