@thewirelessblade That’s a really tough question. I appreciate the courage in bringing it up.
Are you afraid of learning what you believe about the topic through writing it, or are you worried about creating a story for other people to read, and worried that you won’t handle it maturely enough? Or are you worried about something else entirely?
If this is the theme that naturally arises from your story, you’re expressing something really important to your inner self, whether you’re conscious of that or not. It’s something your subconscious mind decided needed to come out.
You can simply pursue the story as an exercise in journaling and self-discovery, deciding now that you’ll be as honest with yourself as possible and then setting it aside without ever intending to show it to another human being.
You can also decide to change it now and avoid it because you really don’t feel ready to engage with the topic.
You can also hope the story changes of its own accord, but from experience, I wouldn’t bet on that happening once you’ve stumbled onto something you can recognize as theme.
No matter what you do, you should pray about it, and do concordance research to refresh yourself as to how the Bible deals with your theme. Maybe even talk with a pastor or people you trust (who understand and respect how personal and meaningful writing is and won’t just dismiss it) about it.
Is any of that helpful?
"...the one with whom he so sought to talk has already interceded for him." -The Master and Margarita