Hi Zee, thank you so much for the advice! Great minds must think alike because Unnamed Character is indeed a minor villain who’s constantly getting in Liorah’s way. He has a lot more ‘screen-time’ than Hakan, so that helps. I actually have several antagonists, (not all villains, some mean well, they just get in Liorah’s way.) and I was afraid Hakan isn’t doing enough because he feels a bit impersonal, but I have several of his subordinates that are ‘antagonizing’ on a much more personal level.
Epic rivalries between kingdoms make cool backdrops for stories, but it’s the trials and triumphs of well-written characters that make a story one I want to keep reading. Your heroine’s struggle should be focused, clear, personal and immediate, and so should that of your villain.
That’s brilliant advice! Thank you so much, I’ll definitely keep it in mind!
I read your question and found myself quite intrigued with your story and problem.
On a side note, your story sounds amazing, and I’m not saying that lightly. When I first started reading to see if I could help you at all, I got drawn into the world you described in a few sentences. Sounds amazing, and I wish you well on it!
Thank you so, so much! Your kind comment made my day!
I saw the premise of your WIP on your profile and I love the idea! It sounds like a really fun book.
That’s a great idea! I actually have a few chapters in different POVs, including a character who knows about Hakan’s backstory, so I could just incorporate it! I have no idea why I didn’t think of that, it’ll work perfectly! Thank you, that helped a lot!
That’s an amazing idea! I actually have an interrogation scene where it’ll fit perfectly! Especially since you mentioned Liorah doesn’t have to believe it. (She’s terribly stubborn. XD) Thank you!
Thank you so much for the advice!
As for how to reveal it, my suggestion is to have the main character think they have him figured out and get surprised when he moves to phase two.
I love that idea! I’m totally going to use that, it’ll create a spectacular twist! I love making my characters have a perfectly set up plan and then there’s a shift that throws it out the window. Thank you!
If anyone has any more ideas, I’d love to hear them!
"I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right." ~The Book Thief