Reply To: Revealing villain motivations?

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@rose-colored-fancy, sounds like you have a very complex story going. I’m impressed!

I wonder if part of the difficulty lies in the fact that the plot of your story is on such an epic scale, tribes clashing, royal rivalries, etc. Hakan might be the main villain at the back of all the other wars and villanies, but since he is out of the picture for most of the story, I wonder if you might not have a smaller-scale villain, who is in closer contact with Liorah and is trying to hurt or thwart her on a more “personal” level, if you know what I mean.

Perhaps he’s an acting as an agent of the enemy king, but he also has reasons of his own for hating Liorah and her family. I don’t know all the details, but you might be able to make this work with the (unnamed) character you already have, which would be great, because it sounds like your character roster is already pretty long.

Epic rivalries between kingdoms make cool backdrops for stories, but it’s the trials and triumphs of well-written characters that make a story one I want to keep reading. Your heroine’s struggle should be focused, clear, personal and immediate, and so should that of your villain.

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